xxx: reinstalled in the office system, assembly based on XP. scratched the whole department.
YYY : Why?
xxx: the boss came, saw on the desk the default in the assembly picture with the cows of God
xxx: and stated: "Juck of the Lord".

In a lonely old age and undercover, Zhukova is a favorite granddaughter. Nick Blue

One of my acquaintances worked in the Russian government in the early 1990s. And here happened to them a park - on their nose the coronation of Yeltsin, that is, the inauguration. I should swear by him, not by what. The Bible doesn’t fit – Muslims won’t understand. He will swear by the Constitution of Russia.
Have you seen this Constitution? She is thin. In all countries, leaders swear on thick-walled Talmuds, and Yeltsin as a pioneer, on the notebook. They decided to put the constitution with comments to make the embassy look.
But not found. The deadlines are already pushing up. Someone has stumbled here. Yeltsin is not allowed to read a book! We need to find a tomic ambassador, thick and tight. He holds a pen on him, and that’s all. Started to search. Obviously, no one had books with him, only the operator took the book to the child. Yeltsin took an oath on her.
Now, over time, we begin to ask ourselves: did Russia have no other way? Why does the hard, oligarchic, ridiculous capitalism we have built seem to have embraced all the vices that have long been cured by Western countries? The liner opens easily. The spiritual leader of the nation, a man to whom the majority of Russians trusted at the time, during his entry into office, when heaven listened most to his words, vowed to honor and observe Nosov’s book “The Unknown on the Moon”. It became so.

The men! If you have a bad mood in the morning, it means that you woke up with the wrong... well... not the one you woke up with...

I work in the visa department of a tourist company.
I fill out the questionnaire for India, a man, the previous profession of a gas welder, and the profession is now a HEALTHER, mla, what did the burner squeeze him?))))))))))

*from the discussion of the "accidental" 3000 player battle in EVE*

X: I’m more interested in how it all was able to handle their cluster, did not bend, did the players feel normal?
y: There is an interesting technology used - when the cluster brakes, the game time is artificially stretched. Thus e. If before one second in the game mechanics was = 1 second in life, then there begins the stretching of time. Thus e. One game second can stretch up to 10 real and everything happens very much. Thus, the cluster has time to answer all requests, even if they are very many, at the expense of slowing down time.
z: You won’t believe, but my first PC mastered this technology on its own, somewhere in the 1990s.

My dad works as a programming teacher.
XXX: He was returning from a trip to Nagan. I was on the train and missed it.
xxx: found a newspaper with a bunch of sudoku, in two hours wrote a program to resolve.
xxx: decided all sudoku, I was on the train, missed it.

Comments from Habr:

Thank you to the Donbass people.
Tagged in: Karabakh-Barabakh
Zzz: I saw we in the Donbass T-shirts with the inscription “Please.”

very accurate! You have the right to take children from kindergarten and laundry from the laundry room, cook dinner, feed everyone, repair the juicer. Ask the faithful woman: does she need a new shirt (shoes, sweaters, bikes). Live to 60. And to die.

It’s an ordinary system administrator’s day. The accountant enters with the rubbish of receipts and ticks the pen into one of the names (MFU Brother):
BB: What is a browser, what is it for the Internet?
Q: Do you know what the MFC is?
BB: No
CA: This is a printer, copy and scanner in one device
BB: Oh you, now I’ll know.
BB: I’ll go a few more times and I’ll be very smart! + and)))

Nietzscheaner: Trolling friends on the Internet is like coming in for a visit and chanting at the corner of a carpet during a friendly conversation.

XXX: Did you see it? Melhar: When creating new characters in MMO, we often encounter the fact that the desired name is already occupied, and another is usually hard to come up with... I found the solution! The Ikea catalogue. The Godmoron! and ectorp! and Isaiah! and Molger! The Torah! The Aspen! The Warehouse!
NN: Oh, the MMO worlds have just been filled with new beds, taburets and tea shops.

XHH: Roma, what happened to the last dildo?
Theme: by Buddha
XHHH: Figase of the imprisonment...
Yes, it was Epic Fail. You called him right.

Before sending the young man to the store, she asked to buy grapefruit and gave advice on how to distinguish bad from good... Bringed oranges... the next time it was worth starting to explain from a distance..

Romance... I remember, I’m in the bus, I’ve laid off the fresh-washed hair, invited the beard and here she enters the salon, red-washed and looks straight into my eyes. And I look at her, with such a challenge, and she doesn’t look away. This is my day! But already my stop, I go to the exit, she digs into the bag, quickly writes on the paper the phone number and stretches me. I fly home, I wait for an hour, to be sure, I am well expelled, so that I don't fall, I carefully pick the desired number... Hairdresser :(

I work as a programmer. A week replaced admin - now I suffer from a mania of greatness

It was recently:
There is a crowd on the street "children of the mountains", something there discusses on its own. Behind them goes a 20-year-old boy with a thin hose for a crane, tall and in a barrel.The hills show him a skinhead shell and a barrel. The guy stumbled for a second and burned out angrily, pointing to the goat:" sanitary, fucking, and you're going to fuck up - I'll calculate where you live and close the water to the herams!" and quickly went on, until the mountaineers hesitated :D

Men are so worried about the size of the whore that they have to go to war for it.
YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
XXX: All by Guest
yyy:"Advertised by" ;)
Zzz: no one will believe here without a prupic
Yyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy
zzz: drizzle, don't forget to set up the ambulance
YYY: If you apply the line, the calculation will not be accurate. Better to do so, take a thread / rope, and measure from the base to the head, then apply to the line :)
ZZZ is wrong? It’s also wrong – you’ll have to count the derivative.
yyy: The relationship of the increase of function to the increase of argument?
Zzzz: Well if you have a flat...
YYY: Is that about it?
zzz: Member to three-dimensional - need a derivative from the function of three arguments
xxx:thank you for the hide - "how to measure the penis", very late, idiots

From the archaeologists on the point of reference of military conflicts:

"It seems to me that you have some special understanding of the term "world war". But the fact that you intended to build a political map of the upper paleolithic, I remember.

XXX: Ghbdtn
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