bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 72 - ] Comment quote №92706
 19.01.2014
The xxx:
In connection with the law of insulting the feelings of believers, I would like to say. I am a deeply believing person. I believe in the triunity of electrons, protons and neutrons. I respect Newton’s three laws and the theory of relativity. I like the temples. Temple of Science. Only in them can I find answers to most of the questions that arise in my brain. In studying theorems and their evidence, relying on axioms, I lay no hope on other ephemeral dogmatic judgments. My faith and knowledge allow me to explain or at least understand everything that happens in our nature.
My believing feelings are offended by people who try to fight with common sense. I am offended by their desire to forcefully invade my life with their fantasies and myths. I am a thinking person and I want to choose what I believe in. I made my choice.

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №92705
 19.01.2014
to this:
"Where could my cat go? I searched all day. Together with the bed he turned it and put it in the closet. I’m sorry for you"

OOO OOO! We had two cats: a big red and a small black, friends crazy.))) Someday a red half-day made everyone crazy, rushing from us to the closet, wildly cuddling at the same time, until somebody remembered - and where was the small? She is in her closet (

[ + 45 - ] Comment quote №92704
 19.01.2014
Comments on the article "Gay jogger goes to the Olympics"

The Olympics will be
Triumph for Michael
of Boyarsky. He will be two
weeks of flaming
Foreign athletes and
To say to them, “You are all p@races, and I am Darthan.”
He has full right :)

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №92703
 19.01.2014
Previous: Why don’t you call me drunk? Did you stop drinking or call?

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №92702
 19.01.2014
Do you know what is thrown into the new washing machine first? Some powder is special.
Ben: Traditionally, the cat is launched first.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №92701
 19.01.2014
In the contact area:

In Ovir of the Krasnoyarsk district, there are purely Russian officials sitting in all their beauty!!! With gigantic ambitions, imperial significance and endowed with unlimited power!!! And nothing is in their power to remove their nymph! And there was one of the dead who was able to call us. 730 XXXX, I think he did his deed!!! to

— — —
Take off a nymph. not expensive


[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №92700
 19.01.2014
It’s not the first time I’ve read a post about "Dressing in the bedroom..."

What do you have for the bedrooms? I am a girl, 10 years engaged in tourism-alpinism, was on high-altitude climbs, and in caves, and on alloys, and on slopes and in which only bedrooms did not sleep... and "dressed" in the late 90s, and modern "cocons", and in the high-altitude... so even if 2 bedrooms are attached together, it is just impossible to separate someone unnoticed there, of course if a person is not in an alcoholic coma (but this is another story). Getting someone in one bedroom. The mind is incomprehensible) for a joke people were stuck in our bedroom two by two, but not without the help of the third, and breathing them there inside was so self-sufficient... in a tight bedroom even to change yourself - this is the acrobatic etud =)

Finally, reveal to me the mystery of what do you have for bedrooms such "bottomless"?

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №92699
 19.01.2014
This is not a beard, it is a 30-day chest.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №92698
 18.01.2014
The class!

Let us immediately call the fools, idiots, fools and puzzles of everyone with whose point of view we disagree! Let everyone see our education, intelligence and vocabulary.

The world will be better!

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №92697
 18.01.2014
Petrenko did not release passengers from the gazelle unless they applauded him after every successful manoeuvre on the road.

[ + 46 - ] Comment quote №92696
 18.01.2014
by bogomol78
my recipe: I pour boiling water couscous, crush algae there for sushi, add olive oil, soy sauce and voila, no wife needs

The Aist:
Do you have sex, and how do you meet your other needs? Eating well, for example?

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №92695
 18.01.2014
C "Listened to"

Usually, when people fall asleep, they shake because they are supposedly “retarding.” When I am almost asleep, I feel like a ball is flying in my face. I am a volleyball player

[ + 29 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №92694
 18.01.2014
H: Well, it’s simple, because with Snow White in the head, that gnome is a cute, hard-working shortcut, a rookie in a hood, an ornament of a lawn. And not a armored greedy mountain devil with an explosive character and a steel kiwi.
= is
In fact, those dwarfs that are with Snow White are gnomes, small, mimic and decorative peat. And the Tolkien - they are dwarves, "dwarves", directly from the Scandinavian myths, greedy, hard-working mountain swallows with an oppressive character, brutal appearance and a tendency to cut off the legs at the knee of everyone who looks at them from high. Do not confuse.

[ + 28 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №92693
 18.01.2014
to this
How I love these women’s games: “Guess why I’m offended by you. And to be even more interesting, I’m not talking to you.”

You know women, of course, are different, but often "offended" and "not talking" are the last measures. And before that it was already "named", " openly spoke" and in some cases even demanded on hanging tones". You’re reminded of what your wife was talking to you for a week before she stopped talking. Funny but men prefer not to do anything at all while you talk to him about the problem, but in two minutes everyone decides when the wife is already in a position " I can't talk to him anymore, still hears nothing".

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №92692
 18.01.2014
And we called for mathematics.
From that world?
Roxyandry Nnet From any point of the Lyceum (our school was proudly called Lyceum). We called him Merlin because of his resemblance to the actor. And for the call it was necessary to draw a satanic star, to write the sinus, cosinus, logarithm, root and integral on the sides - and then to ring "SINUS-COSINUS, SECANCE-COSECANCE, MERLIN, COME, COUNT TO FIVE!" and he appeared.


[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №92691
 18.01.2014
Google Answers on the Duration of Sexual Acts:

xxx: My friend bought "Priora", sexual intercourse lasted for 2 years.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №92690
 18.01.2014
For the teachers:

Laughter and rancor over the mistakes of a child will not teach him anything good. Thus, complex vulnerable nudes grow, who then write long angry comments on a humorous site, with a mouth foam proving the obvious.
Snoopers like you. And there, like me.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №92689
 18.01.2014
to this
______
This girl:
_______ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___
Not a fool?

Beginning of Citation
The Idiot:
...
to this:

This is:
and ******
The Hidden Pebble:
____________________
This is:

here here :
to this:
**************
to this
______
To all these:
" to this:
= = = = = = = = = = = = = =
Fighting with the system:
_________________________
What we have as a result:

Go to HER. Please please.

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №92688
 18.01.2014
I don’t know, maybe it will be true (let me physiologists or physiologists correct):

A cat came and sat on my stomach. Then close up. Then it completely broke down. And the more he relaxes - the more noticeably it becomes difficult! Is that how he does it?! to

My father told me as a child that it was easier to carry the living than the dead and the unconscious. And the whole thing is that the body of the most ordinary untrained living person in consciousness cannot be absolutely relaxed. Inadvertently, some muscles are strained and redistribute weight so that the carrier becomes easier. And when it is a corpse, there is no such effect, the corpse seems to be heavier. By the way, there are still trained people who in a special way know how to distribute their weight (acrobates, gymnasts, etc.).) is
Your cat on the pulse gradually falls asleep and turns off, goes into an unconscious state, so I think all the same mechanisms are working here.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №92687
 18.01.2014
Drink and don’t send SMS. Get your computer, social networks confused! Write your thoughts on paper and postpone them for tomorrow. It will be the morning of the coming day for the shredder of your food.

Or something all the cotte, odmin... and about the shredder all forgotten ) By the way, the mantra has been tested in practice. From the morning, only you and the shredder know how drunk you are.

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna