bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 54 - ] Comment quote №58801
 18.01.2012
I go from training I see two rats fighting and a nearby cat is sitting in the wall
He looks at them with horror.
Maybe the cat shared.

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №58800
 18.01.2012
Comment to photo

by Alexei:
Horizon is broken

by Alexander:
You were not asked, level fucking.

[ + 45 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №58799
 18.01.2012
Gradually began to overheat the note on heavy toys, after an hour of play cut off. I found it, I see it, and it is - the thermopast died on the sight. I come to my favorite computer store next to the house, there a new lady polishes the nails.

“Hello,” I said, “Do you have a thermometer?
No girl, what are you? (In the eyes of righteous indignation)
What is it?
It is not released separately. It’s now on the computers right away!!! to

X_X (Take away all of them)

P.S She went into the room to the owner, where the discs cut and pressed the cable. The thermopasta, of course, was, just the girl decided to shine with knowledge and put on the place of the nasty user.

[ + 45 - ] Comment quote №58798
 18.01.2012
The water has been turned off.
HH: Long time ago
What kind of shit he took and shook in the shock.
Whoever covered the paper and left?
WOW at work? Or at home?
What do you think if I live alone?? to

[ + 43 - ] Comment quote №58797
 18.01.2012
From Habr:
"In long-distance trains will appear the Internet..."
The first comment:
"Interestingly, and when long-distance trains will appear at least sockets to start..."

[ + 25 - ] [8 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №58796
 18.01.2012
Dear girls, I speak to you on behalf of all the guys. Many of you think that guys treat you like a toy. and itself...
I’m not going to write about other aspects, since I’m going to write only about one. Why if you have a guy, then you think it’s normal to take pleasures from others, and long enough, and when it’s already obvious that the guy isn’t just chatting out of boredom he wanted? Well, what I have, that every friend of mine has a couple of such stories, and, believe me, for us such stories are not very pleasant. Moreover, those who suffer from such disorders are not those who want to drag you to bed for one night faster, for such such disorders - in order of things and are easily carried out, like a mosquito bite, but those who want something more serious. The longer you communicate with a girl and her, the stronger she enters the heart and the harder to get rid of it. But for you, it’s just a game, you’re enjoying being glued to you.
What do we, in a direct text, when acquainted with the state of the personal front to ask, what?

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №58795
 18.01.2012
XXX: Dolled PMS
WOW: What is it?
Yesterday I barely found it possible to offend Sasha. When I finally found it, I was offended for so long that I forgot what I was offended for.
WOW :D

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №58794
 18.01.2012
by Facebook
Yyy: Happiness is much easier than it seems.
XX: Are you drunk?

[ + 40 - ] [17 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №58793
 18.01.2012
In the pharmacies of the city brought discs with the album of Stas Mikhailov. It is sold as a vomiting, patients are delighted.

[ + 45 - ] Comment quote №58792
 18.01.2012
Forecast: in 2012, the third Friday the 13th is expected to be the end of the world. Places are troubled...

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №58791
 18.01.2012
We go somehow with a friend (D) to Brooklyn and he says:
A friend of mine is out of prison today.
Why was he jailed?? to
He crashed into a yacht in a car.
I am how?? to
D - Yes, he was drunk from the police, and decided right on the car
drop into the water to immediately get to the hospital and not to pass the test
On to alcohol! Because in America for driving in a drunk state are sent to jail and for a long time! And near the pier, the yacht was unfortunately parked. In the end
He flew into the yacht, swallowed water and did not pass any tests. He was sentenced to prison for dangerous driving.

[ + 50 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №58790
 18.01.2012
by torrent
The PDD. Instructional guidance for auto schools. Driving

>> How realistic is it? The instructor? Pid@r@s are cut off on the accord? When is the light on the back of the bikini? Where should the instructor go?

[ + 42 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №58789
 18.01.2012
My cat has one "strange thing" - after eating does not eat everything and tries to bite bite. Naturally, it is not possible to bury something on the linoleum, the cat scratches a little on the floor and goes away to wash. He washes, returns back to check - op-pa nihuya magical food in the place buried, you need to eat. And so every time.

[ + 45 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №58788
 18.01.2012
To smoke less, you need not willpower, but the absence of a smoker in the office and -25 on the street.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №58787
 18.01.2012
A friend has a cellular operator MTS, he receives a SMS about the fact that 50 rubles have been removed from him, he calls the operator and asks why?
- You have received a notification about the withdrawal of funds in the amount of 50 rubles, for the notification that you have been withdrawn 50 rubles.

The closed circle turns out :-) Long rusted when you heard this by loud communication :-)

[ + 35 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №58786
 18.01.2012
These tips on how to find a wife and husband are similar to the option of "let's get married" among the misanthropes of the office plankton. You have to marry for love. Ostoherrelo already about mines on demand and men at the plate to read.

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №58785
 18.01.2012
When you have a hammer in your hands, everything around you looks like nails.

[ + 43 - ] Comment quote №58784
 18.01.2012
XHH: With her luck, if she stumbles at something, it will surely be a gold pile!
I believe it)
XHH: But with her character, if she stumbles at him, then she will cringe out of anger, cut off her leg and leave dissatisfied!)) and r

[ + 40 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №58783
 18.01.2012
Comments on Sherlock/Sherlock:
The respectable company BBC (British Broadcasting Corporation) and Paul McGagan. In 2012, according to mass sources, we are promised the end of the world. With this fact, I and many TV viewers would like to watch the third season of Sherlock/Sherlock. Be human, let the end of the world be met with satisfied curiosity.

[ + 61 - ] [6 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №58782
 18.01.2012
It seems like it’s time to remind people what they shouldn’t do =)

Do not turn your eyes into a working vacuum cleaner.
Do not swipe a spoon in the USB port.
Do not remove the gas from the gas plate.
Do not wear a gauge/glass bottle on the penis.
Do not pour water on boiling oil.
Do not try to change the eggs in the scrotum.

Try not to get the Darwin Prize after reading these lines. =) is

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