bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №87834
 03.10.2013
Description of the film "Two Captains" on the trailer :
"Fight to seek, find and not give up" - this romantic oath, given in his childhood by Sanay Grigoriev, for many years led him to realize his long-held dream: to become a polar pilot and find the traces of the missing Arctic expedition of Captain Tatarinov.
Commentary on the film:
Don_Butadeus
Some wrong films have been made before. People on such films grew up, were raised, and now live and suffer. It was necessary to film how Sanya Grigoriev swears to become a top manager in the gas industry or a deputy in the parliament, then he grows up, drinks the budget, steals pensions from the elderly, dismisses polar pilots and closes the financing of Arctic expeditions. Life has succeeded!

[ + 46 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №87833
 03.10.2013
I found an interesting idea!
"System "AntiTrolls" In short, the point is that when a person is bathed his account is not blocked, he can read all messages and write answers to them, but his messages will not be seen by anyone. Thus e. he "participates" in the life of the forum, but all users ignore it for quite understandable technical reasons. Unable to withstand complete indifference, the troll goes away." (c) Zeratyl

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №87832
 03.10.2013
The artist sings before the trip:
Let the fate call me far away, let me go!
Don’t let anyone in the base.
I will follow strictly.
I see everything in the logs, you know!

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №87831
 03.10.2013
Valery
Only in dialogue (also in dialogue!) Students talked about burning the universe. I laughed " it will be warmer", and then "but we will not run off on gasoline and fireworks".

Then came what I predicted.

day
Valery Viktorovich, this is a general dialogue!!! to

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №87830
 03.10.2013
My father is a man of uncertain character, and any little problem he solves, consulting with my mother. I have never called the police in my life, when the neighbors were bullshit, I do not remember to argue with them at least once - my mother always dealt with such issues.
There is such an observation that the daughter chooses a husband similar in character to her father. I think there is a part of truth in that.
I sit with my parents and drink tea. Calls my faithful - filled the neighbors. I tell him what he should do, and at the same time ask how to clean up the brains of the neighbors. He doesn’t want to do anything without me. I call the mother-in-law with the same requests - the one: yes, he likes to hide behind other people's backs, but don't worry, say, I'll put it in order.
So why am I: it was funny from Bati then to hear that my husband is not a man.

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №87829
 03.10.2013
xxx: so strange to suddenly remember your existence
YYY: Hi, I haven’t received a better message in my life.)

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №87828
 03.10.2013
Obama’s meeting with Congress leaders ended unsuccessfully.

The light of savings was not included. Obama was not found in the dark.

[ + 40 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №87827
 03.10.2013
What we did not see here! Our guide Sergey. - Probably, the champion in stupidity was a tourist from Moscow, who came to Pripyat to sunbath. I went on a tour, I looked around, one man was missing, a young woman. We started looking, we see — she split up to the swimsuit and lay down on the moss, the place where radiation accumulates most. The dosimeter, when I brought it up to the mouth, slaps. And the tourist refuses to move from the spot, says that her friends told her that the Chernobyl sunburn, especially if lying on a mouthpiece, is not washed off for a whole year.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №87826
 03.10.2013
-Then tell me, 1 or 2 numbers I'm leaving, what is better for me to fly, in shorts or jeans?
In the plane

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №87825
 03.10.2013
From the Metro Construction Forum:

and Nadezda:
They did not begin to dig. There they forged a hole, pumped cement, as if they strengthened the soil, then one installation failed in the so-called soil, it was taken, the hole was done and nothing else was touched there.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №87824
 03.10.2013
OPG: The acquaintances told here, how in their work an employee, a fierce vegetarian, who read them constantly lectures about the horrors of killing animals and about how much negativity in their dead flesh, was at the same time a great amateur to chew the hematogen, considering it just useful chocolates.
In general, they did not withstand another lecture and told her what and how hematogen is produced. The girl fled for a long time in the direction of the sorting, and soon resigned from this job.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №87823
 03.10.2013
XHH: Comrade, be tolerant to people coming out to the forum from the telephone.

Anonymously...

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №87822
 03.10.2013
Here's how you go to read the news on RBC - and you immediately understand how things are going in the country:
FSB: Sochi will not be transformed into a concentration camp on the days of the Olympics

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №87821
 03.10.2013
XX: If you have once juvenile, do you mean an onanist? What is logic? So if you once drank champagne, do you mean you’re hungry?
Yyy: If he killed a person once, is he a criminal?
Zzzz: If a member, then not!

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №87820
 03.10.2013
The story was told to me by eyewitnesses, but I do not guarantee 100% truthfulness. In the era of my youth, a starman named Decl burned) The older boys roared over him openly, and the young man dragged.)) And then one day came to us in the city of Dolphin, and on the heating he was allowed Decla, and performed in the circus.) They scream, they do their business. Decla hit it, started screaming in the microphone, like you say that Decl is back, and what is it bad in the face to say? Go down if you are cool. At this time from the rear rows a few strong boys in skins rise up and begin to descend. Immediately the music played and Decl escaped to the other side of the arena under his own song.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №87819
 03.10.2013
When will you be comfortable to meet?
YYY: What options do I have?
XXX on Saturday?
Okay then I choose Saturday.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №87818
 03.10.2013
This is the teacher:

I work in a private kindergarten. Go out for a walk with the kids. One girl, cute, in pink rushes, is digging in a sandbox. (D is a girl, I am me)
D: I’m going to dig a hole with a spade!
I: It is great!
D is deep! And when the elders come out and enter the pit, I will throw them into the sand, and they will remain in the pit.

carefully find out from the child whether her children from the older group or older brothers and sisters are offended. Everything happens.
without a joke.

[ + 42 - ] Comment quote №87817
 03.10.2013
You didn’t stand for me yesterday.
Yyy: Clear pen, you are not my wife but his) Plus I am adequate.
XXX: Here, and he gave in the face of the naked! I drove him and his girlfriend. He is also adictive!
YYY: Is it adequate? Nothing he provoked before?
xxx said a few words.
YYY: Yes, I even recorded it on the video, do you want a quote? "You shall be naked with your foolishness to rot in hell, or you shall get into the dirt, a fucking bag of shit, a slayer's piece of shit, a fucking cock."
Better to give advice on how to get rid of it :(

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №87816
 03.10.2013
I often meet with Finns at work.
At one of the meetings during the recourse with Finnish colleagues named Yari, Irmeli and Peck, a conversation occurs about accents and slang. We discuss the way our translator talks. And then one of the Finns says: “I generally thought she was Finnka until I heard her strange name Victoria.”
The rest of the day was with a smile.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №87815
 03.10.2013
The news:
Windows XP leaves positions under pressure of Windows 8
The comments:
Windows 98 is all right.
222: What's not on DOS, is also a good thing
333 and Linux.
444:no why go to the extreme, windows 3.11 is the choice of a real guy.
555: There are still old believers.

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