bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №89074
 31.10.2013
Yesterday I cooked the chicken on the bottle :D
Anastasia: the chicken was raped with three different diameters))
Anastasia: She did not fit in any of the oven
Anastasia: I baked the ugly chicken in a natural position)))

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №89073
 31.10.2013
In the file, select the desired rate.
and GM. But there is only one tariff, 194 rubles. Did I read the document incorrectly?
Yes, there is only one tariff. Thank you for choosing the price of 194 rubles.

(from communication with Technopark Monopoly)

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №89072
 31.10.2013

XX: How I hate the word Get Rid of It! They say it everywhere! What is stupid fashion? These pictures of fucking animals are crazy! I hate it!!! to
YYY: Get rid of it, please!

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №89071
 31.10.2013
They realized the need to rename the department. Support in the "Relationship":
But technical support? Nothing works for us!! to
We also have...

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №89070
 30.10.2013
In the last three years, the main sign of the New Year has not been the smell of mandarins, not the festive incentive, but the gas conflict with Ukraine. So you will hear in the news "gas, payment, Ukraine"- and you will meet the New Year soon!

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №89069
 30.10.2013
to this:
People are pigs.
They came from monkeys.
The evolutionary paradox
— — —
The multiple inheritance.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №89068
 30.10.2013
One known Kazakh in Spain was named the Russian-speaking Japanese, similar to a Mexican, and also a Muslim and with a Persian name.

[ + 48 - ] Comment quote №89067
 30.10.2013
From a familiar website:
I’m a guitarist, and when I bring a guitar to school, all the girls cry that I don’t know how to play famous songs, well, as a true gentleman, I decided to learn to play Max Corge. During the process of playing the guitar, the string broke and hit me in the face. Sorry, Guitar, I’m not going to torture you like that anymore.

[ + 40 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №89066
 30.10.2013
(A post with a naked girl)
Kaesse: I wonder why people are constantly “requiring the name of Nash”?
RaccoonEfistafi: You need to know the name before shaking. The gentleman principle

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №89065
 30.10.2013
c Habr, Doctor_Gradus
There is such a phenomenon: “perforator syndrome”. This is when a person buys a perforator and it seems to him that now any construction and repair task can be solved by a perforator.

[ + 70 - ] Comment quote №89064
 30.10.2013
The Belgian:
When I was a child, I had a cat who was terribly afraid of the vacuum cleaner - only to hear him get out of the warehouse, immediately hid in the most distant room. One day, when my mother was dusting, my younger brother went under the journal table, where my mother also needed to dust and she started to play with my brother in a joke, and my brother began to whisper and chew out of excitement and joy (small, also a little afraid, apparently). I was a puppy when the cat, coming from a distant room for a whistle, rushed with all the courage to the vacuum cleaner brush, like a terrible predator. It was something! I became proud of my cat after this event.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №89063
 30.10.2013
A. G. (30.10.2013 0:01) :
I decided to update the books on the reader.
The chemistry section. There are really cool science-pop books.
But!
This is!!! to
What is it???! to
Physical and chemical bases of salting and fermentation of vegetables.


[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №89062
 30.10.2013
Here in front of us a store opened with the original name - "Fashioned Sheep". So it’s all clear, sheep – because the wool clothes are fashionable – because the socks there stand like my boots. But I can't keep the smile when I see another lady coming out of this store from the office window :)

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №89061
 30.10.2013
Three levels of employment:
1st "What are you not answering?"
2nd The tea is cold again.
Three Time for lunch...when is the working day over?! to

[ + 34 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №89060
 30.10.2013
Ez: You are what! I’m a cultural guy, I’ve never watched Playboy in my life!

Enot26: Did you not read it exactly?

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №89059
 30.10.2013
Mother yesterday changed, obeyed heavily about the body strongly) the netbook was bleeding, and laundering in the evening was lazy, captured a bloody netbook for work )
I am sitting and washing blood from a white netbook. The manager came in, looked and forgot why he went in.)

[ + 33 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №89058
 30.10.2013
to this:
You see the big bang theory differently when you know that all actors aged forty, they get eight million per season, and that Sheldon is gay.

Oh man! You don’t have to watch football at all.
Sheldon is playing well.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №89057
 30.10.2013
discussion of crashed aircraft AN-2 on the parachute forum:
Rather it fell, but burned and exploded not immediately, the guys had time to get out, the pilots - not. No normal person will jump out of a flying plane.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №89056
 30.10.2013
to this:
True sisadmines do not pay attention to worldly little things, as a result of which the signature on corporate mail (which is governed only by odmin) does not coincide with real data.

True sisadmines don’t make the entire enterprise cancer in this way. Brad is...

[ + 18 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №89055
 30.10.2013
The Office Note:
"Lost wallpapers from the desktop - close the browser and pretend to be working."

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna