I’m going to the “Lastic” now.

By loud communication, the mechanic calls the controller. and their dialogue.

M: Controller, go to the 9 wagon.

Q: What is there?

M: There, one of the passengers presses a button to open the pad. If he is a disabled person and needs help, help him.

If not, put it on your neck so that it doesn’t press.

...

People in the wagon roar.

I was 27 years old then. For a year, he divorced safely and was very actively thinking about moving to Peter for PMJ.

One day, a strange, but very nice girl writes to me in VK: say so and so, we crossed up with you at the exhibition in Ufa, you liked me, but somehow embarrassed to say about it, and now I am on a business trip to your city... How about meeting? ! to

Such proposals did not come to me so often (never), and therefore immediately began to look for subwooh🤔. Not finding him in any control issues, I entirely endured the mhatov pause and agreed.)

We met in the evening of the same day, walked a little, I showed her a part of the city, and then she offered to go for a short time to her relatives with whom she stopped, so that they don’t worry and then we go out to quench at least until morning!

We came to relatives, we were immediately seated at the table, I was poured vodka, she had some wine and it turned out that we were on her uncle's birthday.

I was very welcomed, everyone was eager to communicate, I consumed theatrical stories, told anecdotes and generally broke up in full, and I was directly listened and not often interrupted by questions.

Somewhere after two or five hours, when we once again went out to smoke, I realized that the girl was no longer at the table or in the visible rooms... I asked the nominee, and he said that she and two other girls went to the store for wine and juices.

Somewhere at 2 p.m., when someone had already turned off, someone was preparing to turn off, and the same two were already sitting in the kitchen and choking for life, I walked home and again asked about a acquaintance, which I had never seen again at this holiday of life. What her blue-eyed uncle replied to me was that she brought the ransom, and she and the girls went to the club to squeeze and will only be tomorrow afternoon! 😳

I lost weight a little, trembled a little, started to reach me a little, but I asked again...)))

It turns out, her uncle very much loves how his niece tells stories and anecdotes, and she really wanted to meet with friends and go to the club, in visits for just a couple of days, and to celebrate DR with starters she is not very interesting. Well, and she offered him the option, in which she will bring an equivalent replacement and if they like everything, he will drop into the club and visit to the girlfriends later! 😬💁♂🤦♂

When they say passive-aggressive behavior, I remember my acquaintance travelling to my grandmother in Odessa. A typical morning - a friend wakes up, the grandmother puts her at the table and begins: "Eat granddaughter, eat. Are you tasty? Of course, it’s delicious, I’m standing behind the plate for three hours, and with my knees can I? Eat, eat and don’t get distracted. It’s nothing that I woke up at 6 in the morning, went for food, and then quickly came here to have time to make everything ready for you. “Eat your granddaughter, eat her.”

They say that money ruins people... You can think that the lack of money makes them better!

A month ago, a friend came to work with me. He smiles. Blue under the eye. I praised his makeup – he said that Fingal is very good for him. He stumbled and told the story.

He was passionate about paintball and often ordered every little thing in China. Having taken another package from the mail, he went home and was all in his thoughts. For two houses before his, he passed under the windows of the multi-storey and felt like something fell on his head. He lifted up his head and in the window of the fourth floor saw a man in a shirt closing the window. After a few seconds I felt a burning. He fell over his neck and burned his neck. As he pulled him out of his jacket, he arranged a true dance of papua. I checked the jacket, and there was a hole in it - the smoke burned. Trying to mate, decided to first calculate the owner, but the door on the homephone. Until you find it, for the time being, the soul was angry and wanted revenge. Therefore, he decided that the owner himself will come out when he shoots him out of the paintball rifle window. If it does not come out, it will have a beautiful window. He ran home, charged his gun from his soul and began to take revenge. The Dinner. The owner did not appear. A friend was caught by the shooting of the window, and did not notice how someone came from behind, knocked his shoulder and attached with his right. A friend came to himself and enthusiastically ran into a fight. The man who struck him was outraged and claimed that it was his window - a "military apartment". A friend immediately presented him with all the claims for the ugly bite. They remembered each other, and then calmed down a little, finding out the relationship. The man said he had just arrived, and there was only his wife at home. He does not smoke at all.

- What kind of man in the Maca was at the lodge. A relative? A friend asked.

The owner of the apartment, after these words, immediately alerted and asked him to go with him to check. They approached the door and the owner opened the door with his key. My friend followed. The wife of the owner of the apartment was fun in the bathroom with a strange uncle. The sight of the legitimate owner appearing in the bathroom with a broken rod, a friend also hit him a couple of times, brought them to horror. But after the fight the fists do not matter. The owner was no longer in the mood to give lilies to happy lovers. He apologized to a friend and gave him 5,000 rubles. And about the window asked not to worry - the wife said then washes out the tongue.

- The owner of the apartment would have found lovers at the scene of the crime, - shouldered I listened to the story of a friend.

“No,” replied a friend, “he was just nearby and only got home in an hour. A vigilant neighbor called him and told him that I was shooting under the windows.

Plant Chubais and you will know what the Day of Unity is.

One day I got a letter from a brother with whom we hadn’t talked in four years. Please borrow money. I think, ah, I probably hacked it, too, in the UK by the way. She asked her sister to call him back and warn him that he had been hacked. But everything turned out to be easier. He asked for money.

The co-curator on the shoulder of one of my friends was a Georgian, having one peculiarity - he did not have two phalanges of the index finger on his left hand. A peculiar sense of humor has turned this physical defect into a source of constant jokes. When he pretended to have his finger cut into his ear or nose, those who saw it for the first time did not know about his physical condition.

In the defect, there was a feeling that the finger was immersed deep into the brain, which in women teachers caused at least hysteria, but there were also fainting.

In the process of training, various relatives from Georgia came to him, father, uncle, brothers, etc., and my friend was surprised to find that this defect is of a family nature - all men did not have two phalanges of the index finger on the left hand, and only one uncle - on the right.

Attempts to understand this strange phenomenon led only to one conclusion (as the little one in the Yakuza) - it is a kind of mafia, and the one who has a distinctive sign on his right hand - the leader.



Attempts to ask questions met with distractive answers, different and not explaining the phenomenon. Georgia is dark.

During the arrival of another relative, during the feast, my friend, after a moment, asked the question that tormented him to an inexperienced relative. He replied, "Eye, you panime with the daraga, we cut the chicken so, caught the head with a knife, and sometimes you forget to bend your finger. My uncle is left.

My father had a colleague. Professor, candidate of sciences. He left the house and disappeared. We were looking for it honestly and for as long as possible in 1991. Then they were declared missing and then dead.

A young wife and a young son burned, and began to improve their lives. She married again 10 years later.

Nine years later, a brown-grey priest appears on her doorstep.

It turns out that 19 years ago he went for the bread. His way was through a garage cooperative, where he was hit in the head and stupidly stolen some little thing.

From this blow, he lost his memory. Then he found himself in a hospital where he was not sought for some reason, and then went to some monastery. He completed the seminar on new documents and accepted the san. He was a philosopher by education, and his memory was lost quite selectively, so in the seminary he was easy.

He then married and served in the village church.

And one day he reads a sermon, forgot the text began to remember and at the same time all the past life remembered.

Their families are different now. Communicate sometimes. Such things.

By the way, the monastery to which he attacked is located in the same area of the city. The church is 15 km from the house.

It’s good when children read books from bark to bark, not from bark to bark.

I come out of the entrance with a courier, under the bandage loaded with fashionable clothes of famous brands. With one hand, the guy tries to hold the clothes-shoes that did not fit the buyer, the other calls the employee's number. It burns out immediately:
I didn’t get anything, infection. Just re-photographed everything and posted it on Instagram. Seriously, you have to pay for it.

Would you go to Pugacheva’s last concert?
We were that year!

2006 year

Eye pulled out an announcement in the column of the newspaper: "Vacancy of a massage worker, a friendly team, the possibility of providing housing, p / p from 15 t.p."

I pick up the fixed phone, scroll the disk:

I am talking about the vacancy of a massage worker.

Yes I listen.

I have the highest degree, medical certificate.

You do not fit us!

The scope of practice.

No is

I catch up with the sludge:

Knowledge of English.

No is!

But why?! to

So educated and so stupid. This is Bordeaux!

The boss calls:

Q: Is the module ready?

I: Ready, the preliminary tests have already passed.

N: Great, close all the stuff, a new tech task has arrived, we do everything again.

I am :?? to

N: In the first TZ were possessed with sizes. He is not on the plane...

I come out of the entrance with a courier, under the bandage loaded with fashionable clothes of famous brands. With one hand, the guy tries to hold the clothes-shoes that did not fit the buyer, the other calls the employee's number. It burns out immediately:

I didn’t get anything, infection. Just re-photographed everything and posted it on Instagram. Seriously, you have to pay for it.

When you get used to life, you don’t want to leave it.

I am a doctor. Permanent patients are rare. After treatment, people make conclusions or go to another doctor, because they are ashamed. But there is one patient who comes with envious constancy. And every time - with a bouquet of flowers (as an apology for neglecting my instructions and recommendations). I always leave flowers at work, but the last bouquet was the author’s and very beautiful, I took home. My husband was hysterical that I was fucking with patients at work. And nothing that I am a venereologist...

I went to fitness.
It is smart!
You should have said I don’t need it!

Three years ago on Friday, I ordered a taxi for two from work. The designated car is Lada Grant, the driver is Hamlet. It was an interesting rare name. We go out - no grants, but there is Datsun with the number we need. Sitting in the car, the driver explained that Uber (or Gett, I do not remember) does not have such a brand in the system, so we indicated a car close to the class. We go, telling a colleague about plans for the evening (drinking with friends), Hamlet also periodically connects to the conversation. I go out to my house, a colleague says goodbye, “Lagavulin, behave well, don’t drink too much!”



Scene two - the evening of the same day, we and friends in another part of the city drunk call a taxi to get from one cocktail to the other. The designated car is Lada Grant. There are no grants. A friend looks into the phone to check and says, “Let’s go, the driver’s name is Hamlet.” I said, “People, he doesn’t have a grant, but a Datsun!” I approach the car, sit down, Hamlet turns to me, "Lagavulin, you have been told not to drink much!" Friends of O_O

I remembered the past work. Our IT department consisted of only two people. And once, when Odman went on vacation, leaving an enicacher for himself, something terrible happened in the accounting. And terrible, because it happened on the eve of salary, paralyzing work. There are also deadlines, accounts, and fines. The aunts ran and almost took the boy in their arms to fix something there. After an hour and a half, the guy returns to himself and, without expecting any wind, continues to do business.

And then suddenly in the evening comes a staff member and gives him an act of absence at the workplace, which has already been signed by the commission and the head. The guy is upset, say, what absence, when he was through two cabinets, his duties were performed. And that whispering, the mouth of a brick made her nose shake:

“I don’t know, I’ve been here twice, you weren’t at work. Sign, or I will mark that you refused to read.

He went to the boss, who stunned him:

Okay okay to you! Sign this act, write an explanation and forget.

The boy was offended. And here, it does not pass a month, (the case was in the RSC, here the holidays are long, ~60 days, so the administrator has not yet returned at this time), as this person calls:

I don’t have a printer, can you see?

Not a question! Bring it to me, I’ll see!

Then she wept:

Meaning of “bearing”? Do you want to come in yourself?

Vivian answered indisputably:

I want, but I cannot. I am forbidden to leave my workplace.

So the printer did not go to her to repair this until the boss himself ran. At first, she tried to send him in order of order, but he again with the horn, says, "I, you know, the explanatory does not give pleasure to write every time I leave the office." As a result, the boss surrendered, admitted that they were stupid, hot and so will not be repeated again.

This is the moral principle: don’t try to fool your neighbor. The earth is round, you can fall in your own cock.