bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №89400
 07.11.2013
Announcement of vacancies at the MFA:
Health (Group A), service in the army (or military department). Persons who have been cured from diseases that interfere with service in the army are not considered.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №89399
 07.11.2013
The Earth is a flat disk of 40,000 kilometers in diameter, with the center in the North Pole area.

The sun and moon are rotating over the surface of the earth. The same happens with the stars.

The force of gravity arises due to the fact that the Earth moves upwards with an acceleration of 9.8 m/s.

The South Pole does not exist. What we think of as Antarctica is the ice wall that surrounds the world.

All photos of Earth from space are fake.

The distance between objects in the southern hemisphere is much larger. The fact that flights between them happen faster than should be according to the flat Earth map is explained by the fact that airline pilots are also involved in the conspiracy.

In general, read the whole of their publicity... you roast... and then you want to cry.

– – – – –
Thanks my friend! It is mega! ?

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №89398
 07.11.2013
I buy gifts here (particularly the books of Mark Twain, my beloved. About Tom Sawyer, about the Yankees at the court of King Arthur and others). And here, when buying online there are many additional options, somehow - to admire the cover, read reviews, see other books of this author, get to meet with the author.
I think not, thank you. The proposal is tempting, but a little premature.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №89397
 07.11.2013
XXX is:
completed
in the communicator instead of hi answered hui

YYY :
No one understood it, right?
Or were the Russians?

XXX is:
Ohha
She is Hindu

YYY :
Then the norm.
They are called by one.

XXX is:
Ugo
I like Srinagar the most.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №89396
 07.11.2013
Post of Russia. I am sending an urgent letter (why is the letter down), stood for half an hour, asked to be as fast and reliable as possible: 1 class, valuable letter (rated at 50p), ordered, etc.
I wrote the index, the recipient, everything as it should be, paid well and I ask an urgent question:
And how quickly will it come?
Nowa week two approximately.
I am confused, the first thought is to use another service, but the letter is original and I already sent it.
And then the girl in the window gets me quite, after a dark pause she adds with a very long voice:
It is also in Moscow.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №89395
 07.11.2013
xxx: Colleagues, who has 500 to 100 to exchange? I want to eat...
YYY: Right, you don’t get a single note.
zzz: I can put small stuff to the harness)

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №89394
 07.11.2013
separated from his wife. Previously, for three years, they lived together, in the evenings, went to a grocery store in the house where they lived together. I met the seller and greeted him. I have been to the store alone lately.
Is there anything your wife does not come in?
I, completely spontaneously: Love no longer lives here.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №89393
 07.11.2013
From a WhatsApp conversation with my mother:

I saw an accident today.
What happened?
Rain, wind, darkness, lightning in the face, some wave in the distance. Then we slowly went...
The wind swallowed the car. by Luci. Driving is hard. I cannot see the moon.
“Listen, do you tell me about an accident, or do you read Stephen King?!..

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №89392
 07.11.2013
by Peter. All over the city are hanging absolutely the same announcements: "Work in the real estate sector! For boys from 18 to 27 years old! It’s a high income!" Obviously, in the military committee are very lazy and stupid workers.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №89391
 07.11.2013
XXX: The Lord
You have like your parents were cats, so cute
X: Should I tell you that you are cute or brutal?


[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №89390
 07.11.2013
News: The Netherlands ready to accept oppressed Russian homosexuals

I even thought about changing orientation.)

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №89389
 07.11.2013
Stop the slave cows?:) We also had similar trailers in the city, I go on a bus, the conductor announces: Next stop "Cathedral"!
One body to another: Forget! I decided to name the cafe "Dralny katedral"!)))

[ + 33 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №89388
 07.11.2013
The Ladies! Remember to!
Gloves without fingers are tariffs, not mines.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №89387
 07.11.2013
On the Russian version of Taobao description of the tablet
"...+ bag + headphones beautiful flat devil condenser + pen +..."
The fucking! I will buy electricity for the devil’s condenser!!!! to

[ + 23 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №89386
 07.11.2013
The xxx:
to this:
"Looking at the series
We calculated the IP address of the person who sent letters to the victim with threats.
On the large screen in the laboratory proudly illuminated 192.168.0.120...."

Per this is done intentionally - that, for example, a fictional ip would not be surprised.
Previously, the films used fictional phones, so there were those who wanted to call them, which was very popular with real subscribers who had such a number.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №89385
 07.11.2013
Nikita
Japanese good, good language, you won't call them a ballroga, not what your German - as you say, "Give me a bakery, two teas and a sausage," so I want to fall on the floor and wait for the roar of the devil of fire.

Daria is
Geben Sie mir bitte eine Semmel, zwei Tee und 2 Würstchen, bitte

has fallen?

Nikita
The fact is that he goes...

Dasha, I love you, know this.

Farewell my dear!

O already sd

Daria is
I am tired... tired... tired

“Your order, sir.

Nikita
Fact of E-E!

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №89384
 07.11.2013
From the news: "The Olympic torch in space will be delivered by a Russian, American and Japanese"

Well...
The Japanese torch will finish.
The American, as soon as he learns that gas is inside, will try to seize the torch democratically.
And if you believe the old anecdote, the Russians will either break this torch or lose it.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №89383
 07.11.2013
They say like it is erotic, and want it is pornography, and if you don’t want it, and you don’t like it, it is work!

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №89382
 07.11.2013
In the zoo at the photo with an animal without a signature:
Let’s argue that this is a rosemary!
Let’s argue that this is a red panda.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №89381
 07.11.2013
The morning office atmosphere: everyone knocks on the keys, people walk in the hallway, the smell of coffee. A colleague dealing with the accounts after the vacation excitedly raises his head and seriously asks:
Did we get smartphones from 10 dimensions?
Everyone has thought.
- The portal has not opened yet - I answered laughing.

My name for the electronics store "10 dimension" was a steep move xDDD

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