As a student, I worked as a technician in a shopping center. I knew a merchant there.
Beautiful, pleasant and lonely. At the end of her and at the beginning of my
The working day. I turned to her very strangely. In her department, I shifted every mannequin a little every time. Then I raise my hand, then I turn my head, then I do so that they look at each other. I waited for her to realize that it was mine. One day I did not catch her.
Then Sarafan brought the news that she went mad and resigned. She said the mannequins were alive. The director did not endure and drove out on his own.
Forgive me if she is alive. I just wanted to meet.

I, I remember, had an uncomfortable situation when the cat gave birth in the barracks, and her cats lived there for a while. And the cottage of our dog is right next to the yard, if desired, the dog can enter. And here, I go into the barracks, I don’t see the cats inside, but I see the kittens, and the curious dog immediately runs in the trail, and with me looks at the kittens. I just don’t want to watch, I have to touch. And here, I take one kitten on my arms, the kitten is scared, begins to scream, the fig knows where the cat is flying from, and suddenly throws on the dog’s face. I was so uncomfortable in front of the dog.

We have a pasha welding machine at the factory. He is different in that he constantly smells of an unwashed man. This morning we change clothes with the brigade, and he enters the Pasha's dressing room. Everything immediately accelerates, because it is close to Pasha and so hard, and when he is in some cowards, it is not possible at all. Pacha presses everyone’s hands and begins to expose himself. One of the mechanics starts a conversation on the topic of "how often who washes." Type, hint to Pasha that would not hinder taking a shower more often. (There is a shower at work.) Someone says that once a day, someone two, someone another day, and then Pasha, standing in a coward, says, "I'm determining if it's time to wash." He squeezes his hand into the cowards, something squeezes there, pulls it out, smells (!) He said, “If it smells, I’ll go to the shower.”



The whole team washed their hands.

I remember when I was 8, my mom (she was a teacher) gave me a ruble and sent me to buy black sticks for a ball pen. 10 pieces for 10 copies. What’s easier – for such an intelligent and mature guy like me!

“The black,” she said, “don’t forget that they are the black ones! I do not need others.

I answered, they are black. I will not forget. Not a fool. He went to the store and stated about himself: "Black, black, not blue, not red, not green, but only black - the main thing is not to be confused! "

And here I go into the store, stretch my ruble and say loudly:

- I have 10 pieces, - and I continue for some reason no longer so loudly, - black...

Suddenly I get to it - I don't remember what black I need to buy! In panic, I look at the window: what can 10 copies cost here? Taak pencil - not that - they are 5 kopecks, lineage, circle, scissors? They are not black!

Here my eyes strike into the pair of shoe ropes. Black for 10 copies. Nearby white at the same price, a little further - red, but there are no green and blue, but they don't need me?

And here I am happy to go home with ten pairs of black robes. Black is the most important thing!

The sun is shining, the mood is good, I go and think, "How clever and clever I am! I forgot, but by logical reasoning I remembered. You are never stupid!”

I was happy, until I got home.

During sex, the husband periodically calls by name:
and Ol?
M M M M?
A few minutes of silence. and again :
and Ol?
M M M M?
The silence. I can't stand it soon:
– Do you pinch me every two minutes so that you don’t get your servo dropped?
are charged. The servo has fallen...

xxx: (citation in the grammar-nazi community) I want to learn how to draw emotions
yyy: The last phrase is overwhelmed, my husband now repeats all the way: "I want to learn how to do something% cheb straight boool".
yyy: I want to learn how to cook Borsch Chab straight boool.
yyy: I want to learn to print on the keyboard chab straight bool.
yyy: I want to learn how to hit the nails straight boool.

Anna: The Thai massage is twisted, right? Have you been to Thailand?
Argentum: These mints are twisting fiercely, and I have some weak tails probably...

In comments on YouTube:
XXX: I lost in the Turkish city, English help x_x
YYY: Say "allah akbar" for immediate police assistance

The Trailers. In the store you are given to try a centimeter piece, delicious, with meat. Bring home half a meter of sausages, and there is a delicious piece of meat only the same centimeter, and scattered a millimeter across the sausage, the other 49 - an incomprehensible substance, resembling toilet paper. So more understandable?

The use of salad from plastic packaging has been recognized as dangerous. The first thought is to make a salad from packaging?

Monday in the morning. I bring my daughter to kindergarten. I notice that she wore her left shoe on her right leg, I think, "Now the right will wear on the left and realize that there is something wrong with it."
But not! On her left foot she wore a left shoe. The second left!
Here I finally woke up and realized that they were both really left, and also of different sizes!

Called his wife
The wife instantly stumbled: she opened a kindergarten group in the octopus, and there is already a question: "Which child went home on Friday in a pink left shoe size 28?" We have your right on 26th!"

Modern technology will protect our brains from depletion))

One Sunday morning, inhabitants of a high-rise store on the outskirts of St. Petersburg woke up to learn about the world’s best store, which recently opened in their home. Entrepreneurs hung columns, which from 9 to 22 without lunch and weekends broadcasted about discounts and promotions. Of course, the residents of the house did not like it at all. Attempts to agree with the leadership did not lead to anything, complaints to the FAS and RPN solved the problem only for the time of inspections, the site in general self-eliminated (interestingly why? and ; ) When the legal means were exhausted, someone cut off the wires at night. Until noon it was quiet, people had already rejoiced, but after lunch everything continued with even larger decibels. So a few times, night, wires, silence until noon, and with a new force everything repeats.



The store has won, people have already accepted such a sound accompaniment of their personal lives... but not all. Residents of several apartments for some reason threw wires between their windows, something was placed there on the window. And one, good morning, the citizens of the multi-story information about what outdated and low-quality goods were purchased in the store, how they were cheated with discounts, and it was told about other violations found. The sound went from the windows, synchronized columns, seven apartments that did not surrender.

I have a lot of friends, because I am a girl and I live in a dormitory. There are many different observations on this matter. Here, for example, there is a girl we will call Olya. Olya drinks and smokes, has tattoos on different parts of the body, does not always attend school. But Olya is kind and responsive, loves her boyfriend, and in general it is nice to deal with her, although looking at her for the first time many do not believe. There is also a girl we will call Anya. Anya properly attends classes, has a cute face, which she skillfully uses. She is a consistent look, smart and sunny, only here skillfully uses the situation and men change, like gloves, sharply collecting gifts from them. Everyone has their own truth, but they don’t know who to believe.

If you want to organize a group, you have to call four.
XXX: If one is dynamic, there will still be a group.
XXX: Even if you don’t come two, you’ll still have sex.)
You won’t believe it, even if nobody comes.

A freezing student.
What does it have to do with onion? The layers!
Even the New York bombers guessed to lay up the jacket with a newspaper.
Here is the advice from a very poor student 15 years ago:
even in cardboard boots will be warm if they are two sizes larger and worn on a dog socks;
The shirt, hat and scissors of your dreams can be bound independently (once in a lifetime to straighten up and take care of the match) from a sweater purchased in a second and dissolved on a tie;
For a piece, you buy a set of floss thermal lingerie, and the employer will never find out about it!
or sew / tie the shoulder that you remove together with the shoulder (you can cut the same shoulder from the shoulder banally under the length of the shoulder);
officer guard female (surprise) towel from military trade - the best friend of a man in -40C

Anonche, when a wife beaten with her fists and legs, unable to resist the drunken man of the hand, grabs a stalk, a bowl, or even, falls the sky, for a cutting knife - this is really called the "woman attacks, condemns the modern man." For husbands, the consequences - in the worst case, the wife will simply escape (theoretical administration, but the militia and services will do everything to not accept such statements), and for the wives who resisted, it is immediately punishable.

Specifications for Mac Pro:
I didn’t think he was so small.
That’s what girls usually say :)
I've never heard anything like this from girls :)
Sla337: Well, not all and not always 100% honest. By the way, the female phrase “how huge he is” in 99% of all cases refers to spiders.

Irina scored 1373 points in the Indy Cat game.
Now I know everything about Irina’s personal life.

Description of the charger:
This is not any Chinese counterfeit, it is a real domestic product, which is confirmed by lead sludge on the plate, hanging on wires transformers, yellow sludges of an incomprehensible substance and cannibals, as well as a missing microchip in the installation, instead of which carefully inflated stabilitron.

Discussion of the construction field on a popular forum on the Internet.
A great expert in thought:

I don’t know how others are, so I’ll tell for myself. The deeper I dive into the specialty, the more I get disappointed. First, it is not exactly the same from the inside as it is from the outside. Second, the burden is more and more, and in the monetary equivalent it is somehow not felt.

In general, I sit in front of the evergreen and evil compost, and these out-of-the-clock alkashi under the windows of the gardens, always full, drunk and satisfied. Maybe that’s what I’m doing wrong..."