Jehovah’s Witnesses were shocked: the young men began to knock at their door with questions: “Do you want to talk about science?”, “Do you open your heart to quantum physics?”, “Do you accept the teachings of Isaac our Newton, who took an apple from our ignorance, our misunderstanding, and our fears?”

I have been sitting on the same mobile tariff for several years, which is considered archival today (you cannot connect to it, but you can use it). Due to the circumstances, my old tariff has many advantages over the new one - it is cheaper, minutes more, and you can still call all over the country as part of a minute package (intercity? I have not heard.) Apparently the operator for this reason and covered the bench, releasing a new line of tariffs, which are significantly more expensive, minutes there are less, you can only call in the region and the only thing that has changed for the better - it added a large internet package, but I don't need it.
It was an introduction, and now it is exactly what it was written for.
I regularly receive calls from the operator, where I am joyfully offered to switch to new rates and with great enthusiasm begin to dictate all the positive aspects of such a transition.
After listening carefully to them, I always ask the opposite question: "And what does my current rate not please you?", they are immediately lost and sadly - "Goodbye.." they put the phone =((

The Cleaning-2
# cleaning

I work in a wacht method, so I remove a house near the workplace. I stay in this apartment 4 nights a week. The crust begins to look dirty about 2 weeks after the last cleaning. Another week this minor pollution can be tolerated, then there is a desire to clean up. I clean up there every three weeks. The funniest thing is that among my acquaintances, some consider cleaning once every 3 weeks the peak of lead, others - the peak of purification :)

I live in an apartment with my husband, two young children and a half-blind grandmother. We day and night daily, cook and cover the table three times a day, we come in dirty shoes from work, from school / garden, from walks, from the store. We play, sew, draw, do crafts from cloves, dig, pour, pour, crush... The shell and in general, ALL starts to look irreversible on the third day without cleaning.
In your case, yes, maybe even less.

I dreamed I was suddenly Santa.
I don’t know what to think, fucking. In short, I walk heroically through the crossed terrain with a magical bag, and the bag allows me to hear people’s thoughts. And here, I hear that people don’t believe in me, and that makes me physically hurt. And who believes – many think badly, because in advance they assume that I will give them something wrong. In short, it happened, after the gifts were handed over, all kinds of thoughts like "pizzac, cheap what got!" and there, honestly, there were good, expensive gifts, and the thoughts I listened to, whoever wanted. And they laughed at each other, realizing that they wanted something different or harder than they got.
I woke up from sleep, I thought again, well? I know that DM has not existed for 30 years, why is it suddenly? And then I thought, the same people are ungrateful fucks, they don't know how hard I was.And I also suffered there, that in me no one sees a personality, only the function, the delivery of gifts...

To see if it is not Ivan

>> Thus Perelman is a mathematician

Oh young people, fuck you.
Do you know that Perelman is not a single copy?
Google the pre-war Perelman and his series of science fiction.

Video under a microscope about how a mosquito looks for a blood vessel

CreepyGAD: And what, do our mosquitoes do too?

Afanasyev: CreepyGAD, in our own experience, mosquitoes on the flight immediately into the vein, quickly suck and snatch, and not like this horse.

Shvabroid: Afanasyev, *dreamfully* "quickly suck and snatch"

Justas1978: Shvabroid, don’t forget it’s very itchy afterwards.

From the Mamba:

Marina, 34: Well guys, I understand photoshop girls their photo, but where are you?! to

Alexey, 37: Do we need to photoshop a salary report?

The Medsrach
> Did you go to the Arbitration? Against adenovirus and rhinovirus it works very well.
– is
Madame Arbidol, take a stand. The rest look at the pubmed - it doesn't even work in the test tube from the word at all, it's worth leaving the Russian Federation. In Russia something works. The Magic of Madame Arbidol

My husband is a brave man. If we look at the night of the horror, in the middle of the night he wakes up, pulls a child's bed to our bed and falls asleep, holding him by the pen, so as not to be afraid.

The airplane love

"Like: The Law of the Aircraft: The most deadly thing in the waiting room in the flight will definitely be sitting next to you.

Next to whom did you sit? Who was lucky this time?

Add to the main:
I add more.
Supplementary

A really cool vacuum cleaner himself looks after younger children, wipes out dust and smoothes up bed linen! Some women even replace a horse.

Men are also happy, especially if the absorption power is sufficient

In my opinion, you can’t even imagine the process of "sugging". In this case, I’t trust the vacuum cleaner.)

That’s all right, you say: and the strawberries, the strawberries, is it overtaking from what?

The Boscomes

xxx: Daughter asked to put a spiral in order to go to a pioneer camp
>> yyy: I am a fool. I didn’t go to the camp when I was a child :(

It’s from mosquitoes, don’t worry.

Especially wrought barbers hop-style - with spikes, chains, rugged nails throughout the canteen.

So to say, the barbers.

Conversation between the driver and the driver:
I did not notice that there was that sign.
What do you think I’m a pizzaboll? You can go and see if this sign is there.
I did not want to hurt you in any way. The driver said scared. That would be Article 245.
Haishnik picked up and released the driver for the first time. And when he came home, he doubted and decided to check what article 245 was. It turned out to be cruel treatment of animals.

It was in school years. I, as a responsible person, from first to third grade inclusive, was all irresponsibly in love with only one classmate Anya. We had no friendship with her, because tender feelings, I repeat, were only on my part. But all my relatives, including my grandmothers, grandparents, uncles and uncles, were aware of this dependence for some reason.



But the time goes by, the years go by, and somewhere in the area of the end of the fourth - the beginning of the fifth grade my interests shifted to another girl. And here it was all a bit more successful, there were joint walks, movies, ice cream. Then after a year or two kissed, I remember :)

And here we go somehow with her to the movie, and suddenly the grandmother's sister hits me (I am her granddaughter's nephew).

Well, aunt so nice and sociable was always, hello grandchildren, says, how do you work, where are you going? And I have a straight heart in my heels, because I already knew what she would ask now, and how to prevent this question quickly to come up with did not have time. She turns to my Natasha and asks me, “Is this Anja? “...



Aaaah! ...

This story happened to my friend. He was recently on a hunting trip. While at home (sharing housing with colleagues), I suddenly found that there was no basket. The whole apartment, no. They were stolen on the way. The phone went somewhere. After a while, he was found unloaded. It includes. The first SMS comes: about the disbursement of funds... in the amount of 1 ruble. Well, they think, Vryuga has already started spending money on cards. Why 1 ruble? See SMS - the purchase was made in one of the local shops. Someone suggested that the wallet was forgotten there, and the seller made a purchase at least so that the owner came a text message, and he understood where his wallet was. Alexis walked into the store.

So it went! The seller was not only honest, but also clever. She returned the wallet and even the ruble, which she wrote off from his card. From the reward the girl refused and after offering to take at least a chocolate, modestly chose the simplest.

The co-worker told, he loved to sometimes watch something for adults on the Internet, home video there, the videos are short. Well, one day, he looks at a video, in some porn group, taken from the first person, and there the guy cheats the girl, (taken as usual so that the girl's head is not visible) and the girl with all the moles, that under the pants and other signs is his wife. At first I didn’t believe my eyes, but the facts shone. In the evening, scratching her teeth, I showed her a video. That hysteric, in general, had a deal, but it's not serious, forgive me and most importantly "You can change me once too" She was sent along with her manats far and long. So guys, remember the moths, it will be useful someday.

A classic example of this disease is the fear of pollution, in which the patient every contact with dirty, in his opinion, objects causes discomfort and, as a result, obsessive thoughts. To get rid of these thoughts, he begins to wash his hands. But even if at some point it seems to him that he has washed his hands enough, any contact with a “dirty” object causes him to start his ritual again. These rituals allow the patient to temporary relief. Despite the fact that the patient is aware of the meaninglessness of these actions, he is not able to fight them.

No, this guy is actually there for 2 hours. The dumb hose runs so that before the girl not to be ashamed and not to end before time. And to be sure, it drops twice. In his youth he did so, when sexual life only started and ended from one touch to a woman :)

Discussion of a birthday present

XXX: A book
yyy: I can fit 13 volumes of mayakovsky xDD
There is still a big Soviet encyclopedia.
xxx: we have one of her 😉
Do you want the entire collection? 😉
If you give a gift every year, you won’t have to suffer with choosing a gift for the rest of your life.
This is a gift from my aunt! The 48th volume of the Encyclopedia.
“Mommy, let’s stop letting her come to us, right?
It’s nothing yet, though Mayakovsky is over.