Previous term “the thief” changed to “member”

At the National Art Gallery in Dublin, a married couple with a completely confused view looks at a painting depicting three absolutely naked black men sitting on a bench. The two had black members, and the middle was pink.

Walking nearby, the curator of the gallery realized that it was difficult for them to interpret the meaning of the canvas and, as an art scientist, offered his personal assessment.

He continued for more than half an hour, explaining that this symbolizes the sexual harassment of blacks in a predominantly white patriarchal society. He also added that...

“In fact, some serious critics believe that the pink penis also reflects the cultural and sociological oppression experienced by homosexuals in today’s society.”

After the curator left, an Irishman approached the couple and said:

Do you want to know what the picture really is about?

Do you consider yourself to be a better expert than a gallery curator?

I am the artist who wrote this painting. There are no black people here. Three Irish miners. The man ran home in the middle of the lunch break.

Do you betray me?
What did you get, dear?
You are constantly surrounded by smart and beautiful women.
I don’t need smart and beautiful women, I need you.

Don’t try to understand a woman, she’s doing it badly.

and Casanova.
I’m so old that when I pass by the grandmothers sitting on the bench at the entrance, I always smile and say, “Hello, girls,” and they all say goodbye. The situation is normal, because I live in this house for a long time, and the grandmothers are also constant.
And then one day, as I passed by them, I greeted them again and went on, and suddenly I hear one of them, apparently new and also deaf, asking loudly:
Who is this?
This is the house from the fifth apartment.
The Truth?! to
He greeted all the women and smiled. The poor woman!
All the men are the same, the other man cried out.
At the age of 70, I finally became a man.

Shocking results of the study of the causes of the decline in birth rate in Russia have been published.
It turns out that some villains give the Russians contraceptive salaries.

One day, a friend of work turned into a cheap apartment. He had no money and he took a loan at a wild interest. The apartment was completely destroyed and needed repairs. As we sit on the smoke bar, he approaches and says: help the heating pipes to bring. 6 meters long, no one. Will we help when we need? Come here tomorrow at 2 p.m. Why not at night? So there is a lot of people there during the day, and one guard at night... Don’t go to help, bad comrades.

I’m so old that when I pass by the grandmothers sitting on the bench at the entrance, I always smile and say, “Hello, girls,” and they all say goodbye. The situation is normal, because I live in this house for a long time, and the grandmothers are also constant.

And then one day, as I passed by them, I greeted them again and went on, and suddenly I hear one of them, apparently new and also deaf, asking loudly:

Who is this?

This is the house from the fifth apartment.

The Truth? ! to

He greeted all the women and smiled. The poor woman!

All the men are the same, the other man cried out.

At the age of 70, I finally became a man.

The documents must be signed and sent to the central office. There is a terrible grandmother sitting on the guard.

- This is for you on the second floor in the 23rd cabinet, ask the Alcoholic.

I go to the office and ask the alcoholic.

I am a bartender! This old man can’t remember!

My friend’s father somehow crashed on his 21st Volga in Tashkent to the road on which the court would soon go. All entrances are closed along the road. Here, a police officer flies to him and they begin to scream in the mathucalary, like give gas from here! faster than faster. The father tapped on the floor and chased, and after him the mint goes and chases, go faster! In short, the people were shrinking, waiting for a cortège... here the old Volga is wrapped with all its strength, and then it cried.))) so fast he has never been on the tachkent.

Observing the rapid increase in the number of smoking women, you understand that the word "chicken" in modern life has another meaning.

It was in Kiev in the early 1960s.
There was one family with nine children. Parents — simple plaster very wanted to give birth to the 10th, to get in addition to the order of "Mother-heroine" a large apartment, a car, a lot of benefits and all kinds of other useful things.
But here is the failure - Daddy is out, and the 10th did not work out. They decided to ask for help from someone else. They looked at his construction of the raft, offered him 1000 rubles (money at the time was considerable). He helped quite effectively.
Everyone got what they wanted and seemed to be satisfied. But!! Prorab was wretched and jealous and filed a statement to the court, in which he described the whole truth as it is: he said, the plaster deceived the state, etc.
The courtroom was full of battle, and when the sentence was announced, the people fell under the chairs and began to laugh.
The sentence said:
- in the actions of the accused there is no composition of the crime;
and 1000 rubles. have been recognized as unlawful earnings and must be recovered;
- since the child has admitted that the child is from him, to collect alimony from him until the child reaches the age of 18.

When for the first time in Russia they made a holiday on Christmas Day, the commander before the army told us: “Orthodox Christians go to celebrate, the rest – to the workplaces.” And then it turns out that there are no others...

My parents never bought. My father was well earned, and my mother, and the money somehow disappeared. They didn't save on food, bought things, went to the South every year, so probably. On holidays we have a house of open doors - relatives, acquaintances, acquaintances of acquaintances. My mother sometimes complained:

We spend money on guests and people on business.

For what affair?

I recently purchased Zippo!

They didn’t even see the sea and the pastries.

There are Gypsy!

When Sukharev was far over 50, he and his wife divorced and went to the young woman. Mother of Father says:

You can imagine what a cowboy! What was he lacking?

Maybe he was tired of pasta and wanted to see the sea?

I have 2 employees in the department. Take Dima and Zhenya. They were pretty friendly, they were. Dima went on vacation, and when he came back, I noticed that they became less communicative. Jennie began to avoid smoke.

I asked my wife why. It turned out that someone in the department was constantly wiping the toilet. But it was worth Dime to go on vacation and the toilet became relatively clean. When he returned, the trouble resumed.

Just as the criminals cry out loudest of all: "Hold the thief," the strongest of all in their "patriotism" try to convince the outcast enemies of the people.

For about six months, I involuntarily watched the life of the unknown to me Tamara Nikolaevna. She works (and lives) in the Volokolamki-Leningrad region. Her salary is 46 300 r., paid her regularly. Tamar Nikolaevna prefers cash. I didn’t get the prize for the past six months, I didn’t go on vacation. And I know all this because six months ago, Tamara Nikolaevna, when issuing a salary card, VTB Bank indicated my mobile phone. Thank you that she doesn't like to pay by card - otherwise the SMS would come out of the horn of abundance. Although literally the days, Tamara Nikolaevna tried to pay something for the first time in Peterochka for 629.27, but the operation was rejected. And then it is true, where does Tamar Nikolaevna know how much money she has on the account, if she does not receive text messages, nor can she get into the mobile bank. And she had 82 rubles on the card during the misfortunate journey to Fiaterochka. and eight copies.
And you could have blocked the SMS sender if my pay card wasn’t in the same bank. I have an SMS form. I am very uncomfortable looking at Tamara Nikolaevna. I am bored, I went to the department and wrote a statement, I ask, say, Tamara Nikolaevna to separate somehow. But a month passed, and yesterday Tamara Nikolaevna got another salary. Someone with work is stable.
(And I am still silent about Olga Pavlovna and Tinkoff Bank - these letters go to me. Olga Pavlovna issued a credit card from them and does not pay too well, the debt since May is about 38 thousand. Now it is offered to pay at least 5300 r., or there will be sanctions. However, despite all this, recently Olga Pavlovna increased the credit limit to 86,000 r. It is almost like Tambov.
You say protection of personal data.

Irina Rubanova

There are two classes in Russia: the poor and the poor. With the poor everything is clear, but the poor are those who seem to have wealth, but they have little and little.

I was always worried that my grandmothers were very confident. I’ve always said that if you haven’t called a master, never open the door. Also always the grandmother warned - they will call from the bank, loudly and clearly send this person to the telephone and all. Parents especially warned one more computer people.

A small clarification - my father is negative to the banks, the salary is always received in cash. He never had cards. And yesterday my mom calls and after my warning about new ways of scammers, laughing tells me: they call my father yesterday "from Sberbank", they say you have some suspicious payment from the card passed. My father has no cards. Well he replied to her, “Hospadi, I’m lying there! Are they all sparkly? Well there revived, we stop everything, only the code from the SMS dictated for confirmation. And he, in response, dictates to Beliberto, in short, my mom says that five minutes later, at that end, the tubes did not stand and threw the tube.

This is how I realized that my parents were vigilant. What I wish you!

A true patriot does not sell his country cheaply.