bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 97 - ] Comment quote №23258
 04.12.2009
I just don’t need to lie that you never hanged in front of the iron toilet, watching through the sludge, how the scales of the jd-tissue run down!

[ + 60 - ] Comment quote №23257
 04.12.2009
But did you know that if a donkey is soaked with pepper under its tail, it will move twice as fast?
Listen, you are a genius.
XXX What?
YYY: After your advice our not only go to the next world championship, but also win lol
xxx: Call to Hidding :D

[ + 59 - ] Comment quote №23256
 04.12.2009
<OxCODER> people think:
<OxCODER> what kind of progu mona to write coab spread rapidly?
<Sam_Gold> The Worm
<OxCODER> mixed=)
<OxCODER> I am about useful=)
<Sam_Gold> the shellworm

[ + 57 - ] Comment quote №23255
 04.12.2009
My mother told me a story from her student life. Sometimes they gathered together with a fellow, drank. And, as is usually the case, there was a need to go for the supplement. The problem was in the guard, so once it was on the first floor, one guy usually went out the window and ran into the campsite.
They sit down, so one day in the winter, they drink. Another group already. Drinking is over and, according to the habit of this guy is sent out the window. They wait, they wait, and they are not. And then everyone remembers that the third floor is... Everyone is in shock!
Then it was discovered that he broke his leg. Only not from falling from the third floor, but sliding on the doorstep, when he was already returning with a bubble. She saw it and called an ambulance.

[ + 68 - ] Comment quote №23254
 04.12.2009
Yes, I am like that :)
YYYYYYYYYYYYYY! You are so myriad! Like a cocktail after drinking.

I have not received such compliments yet.

[ + 46 - ] Comment quote №23253
 04.12.2009
I heard a piece of conversation today:
The president is alone. by Vladimir Putevedev.

[ + 79 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №23252
 04.12.2009
and more:
to this:
Never ever!! Again I repeat NEVER suck the fire from the gas plate with the vacuum cleaner!!! to
___________________________________________
The author of the quote, whoever you are, remember! It was exactly three o’clock in the night on December 2, 2009 that I started to hate you!!! to
_________________________________________________________________
Do not lead to sin – that was it?
__________________________________

Do I think everything is obvious here? The fire through the pipe goes to the dust-gatherer bag, and all you suck, it’s the beast of woolots, boemaagki, and all the other shit (lightly flammable, you need to note...) rreeshelbe kelme shsheitanam! It explodes! Well, and if the vacuum cleaner is still blowing out... not bad probably will be a dragon :)

[ + 95 - ] Comment quote №23251
 04.12.2009
Q: What kind of hair is this in your hair?
It is the head!

[ + 30 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №23250
 04.12.2009
Everyone has black stripes in life, but it is up to you how wide they are.

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №23249
 04.12.2009
A story about the "Student's Breakfast" (the chef told).
You want to believe, you want to not, but it was so.
In 1988 he was on a mission in the Voronezh region. And in the farmhouse of the village Ramone found canned foods with the label "Rilla pigs in their own juice" (composition; rilla pigs, fat, salt, sugar, black pepper, production of New Animal Conserves).
The gross weight - 560 grams, the price for the second belt - 98 kopecks (see - the memory of a person!) To refrain from the temptation to try the chef could not, and bought this masterpiece of the Voronezh conserve industry in one copy.
He purchased it and went into sackweed, because he ate mostly in the colloquial dining halls (citation: "b**, you don't even imagine what healthy, healthy and delicious food there was!“ )
About the bank, the chef remembered only in the coupe of the train "Voronezh-Moscow", when the companions put a "battery" on the table and offered to go for acquaintance. Since the boss has all the travel and other means have long been spent on scourge and ruin, he exhibited only a sugar Voronezh selfie in a beer "cheburashka" and a bowl with pork rills.
The right word, the chef did not even think that the pork rilla would outperform even the Finnish salami of the companions! Somewhere in the area of Michurinsk, the rylla had already been greedy swallowed, the "own juice" was drunk, and the bank was wiped out with bread crusts to shine.
All those present unanimously wished to return for the rails, but the train was going to Moscow, where he arrived at Pavelecki station at 7.15 a.m.
The men split up in silence.
Everyone understood that such luck is only once in life, and no one will ever get to enjoy the rills... so it went.)))

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №23248
 04.12.2009
The Armenian Radio says:
Who is this woman rebellious?
The woman who drinks her husband all day is like drinking, and at night becomes a man.
Browse to.

[ + 47 - ] Comment quote №23247
 04.12.2009
Dmitry: Can you show a picture to some specialists, what would they say to photoshop this or not? You probably have such.
Ivan: I can
Dmitry: ща кину фотографию
Dmitry sent (-a) the file "snowman.jpg"

[ + 96 - ] Comment quote №23246
 04.12.2009
to this:
to this:
Cepreu: A acquaintance told me:
I went into the bookstore (this bookstore is not very small for us), asking: "Do you have a portrait of Dorian Gray?"
The sales consultant:
"Oh you know, we don’t have any portraits at all"
I lost the gift of speech, could not find anything to say, thanked and left.

Well, I answered this:"No, only the presidents remained..." =D
____________________________________________

I work as a seller in a bookstore)) every third person who comes in with a clever scarf asks Portrait of Dorian Gray)) I say - Баян)) eyes about_O

[ + 68 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №23245
 04.12.2009
A quiet night in the quiet area, I go home. I called the elevator. He has arrived. The door opens, there is no one. I go in, I press the right floor button, I eat alone, I count the floors. And here "It" sharply clings me to the ass. I thought "All fucking me". There was a strong magnet attached to the wall of the elevator that was in the back pocket of my pants.

[ + 61 - ] Comment quote №23244
 04.12.2009
XXX I go to bed early.
YYY: At 10 in the evening? and ;)
At 6 in the morning :)

[ + 52 - ] Comment quote №23243
 04.12.2009
Forum of the Belarusian Tracker:

The speed is fairly low, but as my friend said: It is not the speed hopelessly small, but life is just short.

[ + 80 - ] Comment quote №23242
 04.12.2009
Darina (16:27:59 3/12/2009)
I am now going through the body to the ballet (a waterproof and a boiler on top, which only covers the chest), the professor meets me and says:"Dasha, I look you are ready for the New Year".I ask:"Why did you decide so?". replies:"Shares ordered!"Red instantly
Keks1k (16:28:20 3/12/2009)
I want to +5))

[ + 62 - ] Comment quote №23241
 04.12.2009
A friend who came back from Spain describes the impressions of the boys there:
She - Oh, they are all there so pumped up, burned, with hairstyles careful, in the maids of pink stretching...
I think they’re all going to smoke, but...
No, she doesn’t, she doesn’t smoke.

[ + 61 - ] Comment quote №23240
 04.12.2009
News without comments: "British scientists discovered brain leakage"

[ + 59 - ] Comment quote №23239
 04.12.2009
Timugin (10:25:33 3/12/2009)
Good morning my dear friend! ?

SERG (10:26:01 3/12/2009)
The frog is a sweet friend.

Timugin (10:26:15 3/12/2009)
Wow, I am about the same!! to

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna