Einstein was the first patented troll. He patented the speed of light in the vacuum as the largest in the world. And since then, no one has been able to figure out how to bypass this patent.
YYY: It’s a shame that old Albert worked in the patent office.

M: The snow is coming. Already accustomed to this arrangement in the morning: awakened - washed - gathered - jumped out on the street - 3 circles around the house - found the car - digged the door - understood that it is not your car - yet a circle - found his car - returned to the previous - digged again - pulled the keys from another car - returned to his - digged the door - dug the car - ran out with a brush - digged all the other parts of the car - cleaned off the snow window - glued the numbers with snow - laid a wheel for the wheels - tried to go out - booked - booked - returned - tried to go out - booked - broke out the car - booked - gasped to go out - accidentally cut the trolley - the bus driver shut down - dropped the car - After the work about the same... >_<

and MV

guarany
04 December 2012 at 14:40

In Russia there have always been 2 eternal questions: "Who is to blame?" and "What to do?"

But solve them could only comrade Stalin, uniting them into one: "What to do with the one who is guilty?"

Russian Foreign Minister Sergei Lavrov broke his arm during a visit to Turkey

to whom?! to

The Ministry of Internal Affairs has prepared documents for the competition for the development of special women's models of armoured jerseys, because the "civil" samples presented on the market are not arranged by the department.
XXX: Even in the IMD, the breasts win.

Irkutsk, morning -27.A bus arrives, the windows are frozen, at the water, the back is almost frozen, the square is cut out to look at the road.The whole bus is hit, everyone can scratch the glasses, but without a result, it is not visible.It is necessary to be oriented in any way that would not pass.There the 65-year-old grandmother pulls out the car navigator, opens the app of the map, and sets the starting and end destination.God give her the bus half immediately gave up the place only if she said where we are happy to eat=)

XXX: What is the hope?
Here is the certificate.
YYY: More
yyy: pension, rn, udo, sik
Tagged: marriage
YYY: if there is)
yyy: like it all))
X: Have you gotten it all?
YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY)))
yyy: the most difficult was - certificate of marriage)) 1.5 years cared for this document to take))

The story happened to me personally.
After a little drinking with a friend gathered home, although a friend and claims that I was not very drunk... apparently while I went out on the street caught me...)
Following the words of my friend...
I go out to the balcony to smoke, see if you go normal, I observe the picture...Natasha approaches the taxi from the driver’s side opens his door and stands on him dumb looking for two minutes, then with an upset tone asks"may you still move?",the white surprisingly expanded glasses of water I saw from the second floor.I had to scream you from the balcony, so that, a bite of an idiot, went around the car and sat on the passenger seat".
To put it here decided after this story told me by a completely unfamiliar man)))

Who are you in our zodiac?
and Baran
X: I know that.
X: What about the sign?
and the fox)))
X is a bitch?
X: What is such a sign?

To all the Pushkinists, the difference between Lukomori and Lurkomori is in one letter, just as it is between a daughter and a boy. Adopt it now.

xxxxxxxxxxx:

Fuck, it feels like I am not only a goat of forgiveness in this family, but also a pig of eating!

Spam has arrived:
"Do you have legal problems? A highly qualified ADEQWAT will help compile a competent appeal to the court"
Proper treatment is important

Now I called AppleMarket, I wanted to order the box, and there was an auto respondent: Dear patients, the number has changed...

Why do you have a smiley as a symbol and not a funny face?? to
Because I write them by hand – old school, baby!

In the shutdown of the rail:
X: I take a prostitute. As long as we are stuck, who needs it?
Thanks for the snow.

Barvinok: Something terrible happened.
I got a spam advertising for small-series production of parts. I am going to order them.

Have you ever made love with your girlfriend while thinking about another?

YYY: Pff... it’s the same as eating mom’s borscht, thinking of a breadth.

xxx: The new iTunes licensing agreement is pz.
Stronger than Faust Goethe?
Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

practice in the children's hospital, gastroenterological department.the doctor, the woman is all intelligent, suitable for every child with the question:"you how today went to the toilet-cake or sausage?"the whole department, we go to the boy of five years in the isolator.now, of course, the standard question.the answer did not make yourself wait long:"maybe you eat cacao,and I am ashamed!!!and "

YYY: Well and how?
XXX: Imagine you are a married man. You have a son.
YYYYYYYYYYYYYY
XXX is here. After a while, you will find out that you did not actually have a son, but a daughter!
YYY: How is it?
XXX: Do not be distracted. You cannot ask your wife about this because she died at birth. In the maternity, you find out that it really is not your son, there was a mistake. It’s like finding out why you’re going to the woman who took your daughter. She turns out to have no husband (she is a single mother), and moreover it turns out to be the same girl you accidentally slept with when you were on a business trip. So there is a possibility that it is actually your son.
YYY:...
xxx: and then you find the sms on the phone of the wife from which you learn that she had a lover, and that it is most likely his daughter... And also you call the aunt and says: I know, we are with you in a bad relationship, but I consider it my duty to say that at the funeral in the grave was my daughter, but not your wife...", throws the phone and does not respond to the calls... and then the phone of the wife, on which it is lit: "My second", you have not had time to take it, and when calling back "the subscriber is not available";.
YYY: Something I’ve confused... Okay, what next?
XXX: Fuck you now!
YYY: Hey...
XXX: This is about the same and I feel like the code is waking me up...