I understood why with every new version of windows, the icons and buttons are getting bigger and bigger, obviously due to the progressive myopia of the main customer.

(about sex in the car) And at the MKAD, by the way, we were lighted by a patrol car >:( And the lights in the car flashed >:( >:( Also стыдобищщщщааааа)))))
But my partner himself was a mint, so he did not hurry to get stuck, waited until I brought myself in order, opened the window without hurry, smoked, waited until the mint came to him and poured his certificate under his nose. The young patrolman was extremely upset: put, he says, the next time the xiva on the glass and do not distract people from work

The Amazing Idiots (c)

I just arrived today from a long trip. We haven’t seen you for almost a year. How much water has leaked since then... Bl... you are a Chinese crane in the kitchen...

Leaving for a year, do not block the entry crane.

A few days ago, I was on my favourite mail. It’s been 30 minutes since I arrived. And here it is, the happy moment – I approach the window to pick up the package. And then in front of me flies a aunt, pushing me away from the mail worker’s window:

T: I was in front of you, I was sitting out there, let me go.

I: (feeling that her jacket is ice) you went in a minute ago, even the clothes are still ice.

Such an exposition she did not expect and with a burning flame in her eyes passed to the end of the line.

She probably used this trick often in the summer.

They say that the devil appeared on earth to take to hell the most terrible sinners who work at the Post of Russia, and they are closed.

Girls who worked in Sbertech, more men exaggerate their expectations on salary. I have seen it myself. I wonder why?
VincentGray We have a lot of training to improve self-esteem. There is no training for qualification.

The camouflage costume. Fuck, man, you went after mushrooms, from whom do you hide?
— — —
I suspect it is just cheap, durable, it is not unfortunate to rot, and it is unrealistic to break - knees and elbows will not be struck. The husband has two such: jumping with a parachute and repairs in them. And the rubber on the manches and trousers from mosquitoes and ticks are well saved.

I walk through the street, I walk through a cafe, a guy comes in front of me and talks to a girl: "Sun, I'm flying to you, Mercury has just passed!". We go through two more houses and she goes to meet him. They meet and then the guy begins to run around her and scream: “I’m in a heliocentric orbit!!" and ?

by Kun

Is the female Maine Coon a Maine Tian?

Onanism is self-employment. By excluding onanism from GDP, you are excluding volumes that could be mined by prostitution. Where in civilized countries the work is done by professionals for money, in the wild - non-professionals provide themselves with services of insufficient quality, which negatively affects GDP growth and taxes.

A man is always happy about marriage.

The former mistress.

A distinct difference in mentality. Russians vs Chinese

In our town, next to one of the district tax offices, there was a small tabernacle with all kinds of nonsense, like cigarettes, chocolate, beer.

Since there are no other shops next to this tax (it is in the shelter, there are some inspections, some offices for long-distance drivers), it is apparent that people often asked in the store if they do not have xerox, or where there is xerox nearby. In this regard, the advertisement first appeared on the lark: "There is no Xerox,"

“There is no Xerox!”

There is no Xerox!! We do not know where it is.”

There is no Xerox and it has never been!!! The question “Where are you?” We do not respond.”

Then "the penalty for the question about Xerox 10 000 r."

So it lasted three months, observing the evolution of these ads in the morning while he went to work.

Then a Chinese buyer bought it.

And the next day he put a bad Xerox.

And a week later I put a large colored xerox.

And now (approximately six months have passed) there is a small center of digital services, xerox, printer, scanner, instant photo, e-mail services, website-sub-key (!) The simplest snack. The Chinese make a hairdresser.

And he is already coming to work on a used Cayenne.

It was decided to hand Mutko into the hands of pure Russian athletes, removed from the Olympics, for the preparation of Vitaly Leontievich for the Paralympics.

Coins and not only

Per the guy had travelled the Kun and the Manula (like these cats were terrified).
In general, much depends on the owner of the animal - this time. And from other people, they are two.
The cat,, the children of the owners asked so that the harsh childhood phobia had already begun.
If you do not understand that pulling your hands to a strange cat / dog without demand is a risky occupation, then you are yourself a wicked buratine.
If you educate your children that animals are toys that have no feelings, no mood, no desires, no pain, then shoot yourself. Animals are not to blame for your kids tormenting them, they are just protecting themselves from them.

Yes, pets are an increased responsibility to society. But the same as the increased responsibility to society is your children. You are responsible for their behavior and upbringing.

So stop blaming the animals and their owners: everyone is to blame.

I did not shrink, I was shrinking. Respect my name!

<DEG#> If the truth comes out, it’s not very good.

Wut: - I came up with entertainment for the next Halloween: the radio-controlled machine is squeezed under the child's car with wheels up and at night it is periodically turned off from the control, causing the car suddenly to rotate to the joy of the lonely passers.

by Kun
A huge Maine Coon cat, brutal and vicious, contrary to assurances, first terrorizes the owners.
– is
The Maine Coon is not a dog. In principle, it is impossible to bring him to a vicious and brutal state. Stories of the same "done the dog to the fool" are full, it always ends badly.

Did you know that in the women’s toilet of the IKEA store there is a machine with condoms? andquot;

Why men don’t, that’s the question.
Yyy: Because they are filled with water and thrown away

Curiousman: The problem is this: the automatic update of Windows 10 suddenly stumbled on Dell Storage Manager Driver, writes that the update is incompatible with it and asks to remove it manually.So I can't find this Dell Storage Manager Driver anywhere. Where does it hide and how to remove it?

IA: Better tell me how to put it. This is the dream of millions – a really working way to refuse updates.