bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 29 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №74594
 20.12.2012
The City Forum:
DubDubom: And also, I read here, a great way to melt the front glass - a burner. And the glass melts and the salon warms up, the main thing is to heat out of the salon!
DREVENSKIU: PLIAAAT!!! I had my skull cracked and my forehead toning plummeted because of you!!! My counselor too!! Why did it happen?

[ + 27 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №74593
 20.12.2012

Her money is her money, and my money is our money.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №74592
 20.12.2012
"In short, the past year. I am unemployed. I sit at home, my homework is up to me. The Aztec snow fell. I go out to clean the snow such a whole goddess: in a puffy cloth, my grandfather's bear's towel, under which the legs are wrapped in old sportswear and daddy rolls of 44th size. I am a bulldozer. I hear a voice behind my back: Grandma, and Jan at home!!! One of my school friends decided to go.) oh I roasted. And she roasted. Short than two idiots)))"

[ + 44 - ] Comment quote №74591
 20.12.2012
About the news "In Krasnoyarsk will set up its own production of foldable chairs", "...This development was awarded a grant in the amount of 50 thousand rubles from the Regional Science Foundation and a diploma of the winner of the competition of rationalizers and inventors - 2012 from the hands of i.o. Minister of Innovation and Investment..."
F-1: radio stations made, satellite communications installations, already at that time almost artificial - intelligent systems, it is impossible to intercept. I remember the systems of the Screen, Orbit, on the Uazics regimental Cedras...they had a test site in the Zverossovhoze, the antenna will be stretched - will be turned on - in the radius of 500 meters, the couslics started singing in bass.
Vit: It has passed. There was not so much spirituality. And now electric chairs, although this is a very useful thing.
F-1 spiral car: now real, like idiots, nanotubes are delighted... 18th century in industry! that is. She was almost killed.
Apocalipsys Time 21/12/2012: The Ministry of Investment and Innovation has completely dropped to the production of foldable chairs and gives it a super remarkable achievement?
The idiots! Pull the Ministry in the neck!
Where are the factories?

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №74590
 20.12.2012
XXX: I love you and I want you to borst!

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №74589
 20.12.2012
Cyborg_Cat
Today called the accountant to renew the keys, license and check the program for readiness to work with the words: "We and you need to put everything in place now, so that after the new year I can go out, cuddle and immediately work!"

Have you prepared the plateau? =) is

[ + 33 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №74588
 20.12.2012
In the morning, he received a letter from the contractor.
And the telegram tonight didn’t let you go, you’re an under-Russian idiot?!..

[ + 30 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №74587
 20.12.2012
It is time for the tree. We remind you ?

NEVER "Take out" rain from pets
This is most likely to kill an animal.

All you can do is cut.

Or to the veterinarian.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №74586
 20.12.2012
Only in Russia, opening a crane with hot water, you can expect to go:
c) The cold
b) the brown

[ + 24 - ] [15 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №74585
 20.12.2012
On the New Year’s Eve, you will again have to watch the boring lights in the starry stars, singing the songs that have stunned everyone and the brightly shining toilet whitening of teeth... and at this time in the parallel universe in the new year’s lights, Metallica, Ozzy, Cannibal Corps, Marilyn Manson, Sleepnot and who with them exactly the same will sit with happy apples, drink butaphore champagne, kick each other in the mouths of serpentine and candy and sing their songs... send me there, Santa Claus, huh?

[ + 37 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №74584
 20.12.2012
Announcement of sale of Infiniti FX35, 2007
"Moscha and idéal state equipment premium without running north the most complete equipment is all native pts 2 hosts robots perfectly on the box of appeals no walking ideal salon not scratched not scratched leather excellent dividi manator on the ceiling machine clean Japanese"
P.S How do people make money on such cars?

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №74583
 20.12.2012
Service statement from our customer: product mouse defender flagship, malfunction - does not work the microphone, does not photograph

[ + 51 - ] Comment quote №74582
 19.12.2012
by Newt@:
The Magician in the Blue Helicopter is coming.

and Gorrent:
thank you!

by Alexei:
And nobody was purely logically confused by the fact that the guy sings a song in the city, and a helicopter is supposed to arrive. And the fact that he is not allowed to sit on the busy street doesn’t bother anyone?

AXPEHOJIOr
And you, dear, "really logical" in a situation where a talking crocodile sings a song in the middle of the city, accompanying himself to the muse. The instrument, and consisting of an unknown relationship with an unknown ear hernia, is confused only by the fact that the helicopter (which, by the way, the wizard with film equipment is lucky) will not be allowed to land?

by Alexei:
It is irrational as

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №74581
 19.12.2012
I went with my dad to choose a new car in the salons. We enter the pejo salon, Papa (P) approaches the consultant (K) and asks:
Q: Good morning, please tell me, do you have crash tests here?
K rounded his eyes and said: No, they do not spend, only in production... and why do you?
And here, my dad says: I want to participate.
see confused with the test drive :) you would see the eye of the consultant)))

[ + 34 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №74580
 19.12.2012
Do not worry! Even if the 21st is the end of the world, the 22nd is Energy Day.
We will come and connect them all back!

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №74579
 19.12.2012
The director asked to record music for the corporation, from my musical preferences, I think I was fired.

[ + 45 - ] Comment quote №74578
 19.12.2012
Program for December 21st:

NTV – The End of the World
The STS - 2012,
RENTV - The Apocalypse
................
Russia - Celebration concert for the Day of the Russian security officer

[ + 38 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №74577
 19.12.2012
As long as feminists do not demand, along with equal rights, compulsory army recruitment, I will not believe them.

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №74576
 19.12.2012
Ruslan broke four windows with a stick.
Alexei broke the cushion.
Victor gained a kilo fucking again.
A pyramid in the hallway.
Michael organically bled into the bushes.
Innocent was hysterical.
And you? What is "The List of Magnitsky"
Has America been adequately punished?

Leonid Kaganov

[ + 56 - ] Comment quote №74575
 19.12.2012
Samsung announced a new advertisement. Where Santa's Elephants Talk About Purchasing in Connected Smartphones in Discount!
Do they really believe that deer buy smartphones? Or do they consider those who buy a smartphone in a discount to the elephants?

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