19:19 Dragon Polymorph
yesterday put the pants on the wash, put the mode "washing+washing+washing", well I forgot the wallet... you don’t imagine - the machine kicked off ALL the little things, not getting the wallet out of the pocket and not opening the pockets... :D

My mother rejoices:
I will buy champagne tomorrow.
Are you going to note?
No, we are going to drink!

xxx: I had a pattern break when in the bus I was driving, such a sportsman, 13-14 years old, in a sports jacket, in an Adidas hat, sat in front of me, got "Popular Mechanics" and began to read an article about anti-neutrino

In the morning on the radio dialogue of the DJ (DD) and the radio listener (RS):
Q: Are you alone there?
RS is no. I am with my wife and a friend. He is drunk. We take him out of the sauna to work.
This is the PSG, comrades! to work! I did not hear.

What are your plans for the 14th?
Fuck those who remind me once again of my loneliness!

Calls for technical support. I want, he says, to connect the Internet on the TV to watch smart TV, but, he says, I need an ip address, a gateway, a subnet mask... I answer that the connection from the TV will not be possible, a router is needed. And he gives me: - I know, I have already been told about this... But I don't have a router, but I want to watch smart TV. So I came up with something like this: I connect from the computer, then quickly pull the network cable out of it.

I am crying.

From the discussion of a way to measure the area of a cat, without member damage and bullying the beast:

Take any empty box and place it in the center of the room. After a while, the cat will take the box. Visually assess the cat’s occupied space. Consistently adjusting the outpouring of the cat or the underfill of the box can get a box with the perfect cat filling. Measuring the interior volume and area of the box will not be difficult.: )
Raw technique, the cat begins to approach the spherical)))

XHH: What are you doing?
I am depressed by being broken.
Fuck you guys! We are so similar to you.

Abcd: Have you ever watched a movie on a laptop while lying in the bathroom?
Efgh: I am not
efgh: I was just shaking in the bathroom
Ephgh: I do not recommend
efgh: then you swim in this shit, it'll stick all
ABCD: Blonde
Efgh: Have you not asked about that?
ephgh: apologize

News "The Scottish authorities will give warm welcome to guests from space"

Eric: I’ve somehow understood this with lawyers and we’ve come to the conclusion that aliens are alien.
It fits well into the legislation on unattended livestock.

Aloysius Mogarich: OFF And is it a smoothie, or is it time to buy a smoothie?
Reference to possible war between North and South Korea

The first comment:
Are you a man from the end of the world?
Apparently it was recently

Shadowhowler
I am sorry, dear publisher.
Shadowhowler (15:25:18 13/02/2013)
The printer does not print. Our specialists come here:
Your paper is over!
Yes, I know

The headline of the news "The sea slime surprised scientists with a single-use penis" excites the fantasy.

XXXX: People, my cell phone was stolen, I restore contacts. Give me your contacts.
WOW: I have not changed.

Why all these meaningless questions? We know that the meaning of this interview is to demonstrate your superiority over me, so let me immediately take off my clothes and you stumble into me with a wooden rod?

Comment to news:
Iran offers Russia several oil and gas fields for development

asd> Have you got the chakras? Invite the mouse to visit!

Looking at the zombies new video about our militia, remembered as she was studying at school and from the local department sent us a young girl policeman. Well, she told us long and persistently about the criminal situation in the city, about how boldly law enforcement agencies fight with criminals, how disclosure has increased, etc. And then this: - Well, in general, from personal experience, I can say that small theft is not so pleasant, I went to work and I got my bag, and there is everything and the phone and wallet, well though the card was in my pocket... - And the bag was found? Of course, no... there was an uncomfortable silence somewhere for a minute.

[13.02.2013 13:57:23] xxx: February 13 is celebrated as World Radio Day.
[13.02.2013 13:57:29] xxx: Do you have a connection with us?
[13.02.2013 13:57:33] yyy: and today is the day of condoms
[13.02.2013 13:57:48] xxx: so you have a double celebration?

Father is a former military. Not by hearing, everyone knows the delicate attachment of the military to the proverbs. I went to work for a large company. In the evening, he comes, we sit and drink tea, he tells us about what the entire IT department has seen today in panic. Transfer the servers to self-service. The servers are overloaded, etc.

This man, having spoken to the itchnik from the force of 5 minutes in the morning, gives his mother a phrase to ask me to wake up: "Son-not a server. He falls down and stands up".

In 2001, the European Union decided that tomatoes are not vegetables, but fruits. by Facepalm
Yes, this is a berry.
zzz: that is - ketchup is a compot?