to man:

And if I live in Russia, but I don’t need the Crimea, I don’t hate Ukraine and the Ukrainians, I doubt who is shelling Donetsk and I just want all this stuff to get tired and all live together, where am I?

You are here, friend... There are still few trolls here...)))

I had fun in the store today. A man falls a pack of condoms from the shelf into a shopping cart. He buffers "no, that’s fate" and buys them.

here here :

In connection with the cancellation of travel certificates discussed in the accounting office, how now honest employees to confirm a business trip. The offer won "And let’s all on the smartphones we put the foursquare and we will pay the daily check-in"

– – – – –

One day, in the Moscow cadet corps (I don’t squeeze, what) with a sunny morning, another freezing order came down from the top – to photograph all the food produced by our kitchen for cadets: in pots and bushes, serving, weighing, etc. The standard wave rose: to allocate the camera, to train the employee, to allocate for this time, after all. It won the offer to register on the cadet body an Instagram account and photograph the food there.

This man :

And if I live in Russia, but I don’t need the Crimea, I don’t hate Ukraine and the Ukrainians, I doubt who is shelling Donetsk and I just want all this stuff to get tired and all live together, where am I?

Nothing anywhere. Sit straight up. Let’s make friends, though. Maybe more of us will gather.

From the Airline Forum:

Think about flight safety! In Vladikavkaz airport, people with Ossetian cakes are allowed on the plane, which are not considered an additional place for hand luggage at registration! I wore these cakes!! Why are you putting cakes on the plane?

YYY: Because of your shirt, all the cakes in some hair! Why are they putting clothes in the salon?

In what instances do you use the word "mudak", and in what "pydoras"? Can they be interchangeable in any case when used in a bad sense? In multiple numbers, for example, the word "pedorasy" sounds much higher than "Mudaki". And when they say, “Mudaki,” a small group of people appears to be smaller and personally disgusting to the person who uses this word. For example, fools can cheat in a modem or ask you for a bunch of references, and pidos are destroying the environment, the economy and the internet. It still seems that the fool acts unconsciously, unlike the pyodorus, who acts intentionally.

Comment on the article that in Germany there are people who for money tell their spouses that their half wants a divorce:
They were caught on the street, stuck in the trunk, brought to a raw unheated building, glued their mouths with a glue tape, handcuffs attached to the rust tube.
I will tell you only one thing, only once. Listen to me very carefully. If you understand me, Kiev.
Your wife is divorcing you"

Theme of hello! Where is your girlfriend nearby?
What are you going?
Ask her such a bitch. I decided to bake the blines, blur the paste, beat it, and the wisdom of what - the foam was done!
Did you smoke there?! to
and Harosh! I drank a little water and that’s all.
How did the Testo?
Yes as usual: flour milk two eggs salt sugar and mixer all...
Try adding pain!
It was a thick foam. (
Try the milk...
With milk liquid and the test is already a whole pot!!! to
Let stand for 30 minutes.
Oh! The liquid appeared below. Oh wow!! to
Try to cook like that. Just sign up! I am already interested!
Funny things in the hole 😉

It doesn’t matter how I came to this before, but, experimentally, it turned out that "OK GUGL" also reacted remarkably to "fast Google", "upon Google", "field Google" and etc....(C)

Sheriff

See also: "Legends" It looks like socks. Why live this way?

"Where does the world begin?
From the picture in your booklet..."

The Arbuz? Did not expect...

“Lord, I want to have a gay in slavery who will have everyone who doesn’t love me.”

And caterpillars are generally more selfish than frogs. Not noticed?
Sova at 12 at night just won't call anyone, because she understands: people are already asleep.
9 a.m. is the normal start of the day.

--------
It’s twice as obnoxious if a whistleblower is the boss and calls at nine in the morning from the workplace to find out "where this lazy ass is stuck"!!!! to

to this:
– You are 24 years old, you rent a separate apartment in the capital for your significant salary, on the days you go to interview in the yandex and you can’t make tea?
-No, well, I think in Yandex tea is prepared by specially trained people, ch.

– – – – –
In Yandex, there are indeed "specially trained" people who make tea!

X: Do you have a favorite brother?
and there is)
X: What is it?
Y is pink)
X: and my with a white tiger’s face on the whole pledge. I put half on the couch, I lie down, and I cover up the other half.
and : )
X: you can dismantle the couch, ride on it and wrap up in a goose ^^
x: and then so "blin, the light in the hallway did not turn off" -_-

Kasthack: Wow, the Russian audience is burning more than it is on Twitter and the hipster.
Casthack: How is it? Everyone is trying to get their food on Instagram / tell about another none-needed shit on Twitter, but it is still smaller than graphomans from a live magazine.
Smirnyaga: Because you can’t express the shit that is being made in Russia with pictures of food.

Have you bought something for tea?
Jem is round.
Lily: What kind of beast is this?
[16:07:25] Jem: Well this - the ring
[16:07:37] Lily : A bubble?
Jem: a -exactly

How to strengthen the marasm:

xxx: Today I heard that in Ukraine the film was banned because of the fact that Mila Kunis, who plays the main role, is Ukrainian, but sympathizes with Russia.
YYY: Is it okay? It is given)
xxx: Then the Fifth Element should be banned because of Mila Jovovich, who, by the way, was born in Kiev =)
ZZZ: I am not! It is necessary to ban all films with Bruce Willis because he played in one film with Mila Jovovich!! = = )

Just in Russia, 24 correspondents called the U.S. Secretary of State "General Secretary".

I take my son from kindergarten.
Son (with the intonation of the teacher): Yes, I complain about Dima.
I am (with a serious look): I listen.
Son: At first I accidentally hit Nasta with her foot on her tongue.
I was able to listen to the story until the end only from the third time)))