bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 20 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №78128
 01.03.2013
A friend’s story: Koresh called in his father’s absence to ride that car. Apogee is understood - reminded.. :) Pered reminded. The root already begins to sneeze with the nose, it becomes red - here is one puppy P from the company and ordered everyone not to suck, wait for him and soaked meant. After an hour, we called, met on the order of P over the slope, we see: the fiber of the burned plastic buffer, as we remembered; their meaning was thrown off the slope, the "new" was put (with no plastic morocks, everything on the clamps), everything is perfect, everyone is satisfied. What almost burned? Within 10 minutes of his arrival, I notice that the front and rear numbers are different!!and "

[ + 48 - ] Comment quote №78127
 01.03.2013
[16:32:20] XXX=): aaaarrrrngggrhkhh.....
YYY: What is there?
[16:33:05] XXX: I went inside the car, and there was a spider... healthy... I almost died... I called the owner of the compass, and she said, “Oh, the spider was found!”"
[16:33:17] XXX: ppt >.<

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №78126
 01.03.2013
How colorful and amazing is the world?
yyy: Remove the front glass in the salon...?))
xxx you know!

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №78125
 01.03.2013
[3:53:55] Doctor911: Buddhattis
[3:54:07] Doctor911: This in Lithuanian means "Budraitis"
[3:54:13] Doctor911: Because Budraitis is a name
[3:54:34] MacTag: a fun lesson of Lithuanian language
[3:54:40] MacTag: at four in the morning

[ + 62 - ] Comment quote №78124
 01.03.2013
This night. and Kamchatka. A strong earthquake, 5 points. I descend from the bed, shaking up to the entrance door - to open, so as not to be spelled, on the go, the bricks crumble, and in the room, the father calmly holds the plasma with his hands, so that it does not fall from the wall.

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №78123
 01.03.2013
YYY: My boyfriend has left me, give me advice what to do???and (
XXX: lkz yfxfkf vj;tim gjghj,jdfnm tuj dthyenm? tckb yt djpdhfoftncz ghblevf xnj yb,elm tot? z yflt.cm e nt,z dtc gjkexbncz d ndjtq kbxyjq ;bpyb)
XXX is...
XXX: Just run on it.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №78122
 01.03.2013
Hulk Master Green [Winc]: the whore on the back of the heavy
Hulk Master Green [Winc]: what kind of shoulder raises
Ivan Michurin: a trapezoid muscle?
Nulk Master Green [Winc]
Ivan Michurin: the shit that the shoulder raises this shit of soldiers

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №78121
 01.03.2013
Let us take the world and divide the virgins in half.
Yyy: on the belt or on the left and right sides?

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №78120
 01.03.2013
Shroomtea: We have a client, Sasha and I are typing.
Shroomtea: Go to the ass.
Can you express yourself more culturally?
Follow into the rectum by the shortest route.

The client almost fell from the chair.

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №78119
 01.03.2013
I remember, I was 17, I walked around Arbat with a screw, a girl also looks like a seventeen, juicy peach is simple, and asks, say, do you want to listen to a lecture about pure love? There, nearby, is my apartment. I, the fool, agreed (in Arbat and not so offered), and in the end I naturally read a lecture about pure love. No one has divorced me so brilliantly anymore.

[ + 42 - ] Comment quote №78118
 01.03.2013
Tetris is a life game, because it shows how fucking it can be in the future if you get stuck at the start.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №78117
 01.03.2013
111: Hi!I have an apartment, I and my dad are opposed to it, can fraudsters write us out?
222: What did you do with your dad? O_O
333: Well, if you are opposed there, it is not excluded.
444: You’re all wrong, you have to be condom! If you are condom, you will not be written out!

[ + 43 - ] Comment quote №78116
 01.03.2013
darthslider: I’ve encountered a decent number of bank clients and the collection is just a real hell. If the instructions are written "start with a double click of the mouse", then don't give god you will highlight and press the enter. In the best case, the devil will come out of the monitor and strike you with fairies.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №78115
 01.03.2013
by James:
Today in the dining room at work, a colleague began to boast:
“I’ve gotten the guy "laplas" for dinner.
Funny, but what is it?
and Laplace.
Well, and Laplace is what?
The Laplace? Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah? to

They even cracked over the table from us)))

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №78114
 01.03.2013
Conversation with Brother:
What to Draw Honey? and :)
Two breasts on the shoulder.
Why Why?:D
- Well, in any dispute you can win by saying the phrase: "Who has breasts is right," all such people look at you in confusion, and you show them the breasts on their shoulders, and you are right, and you have won.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №78113
 01.03.2013
When there is nothing to say about politics, it is said that he is “a real man.”

[ + 47 - ] Comment quote №78112
 01.03.2013
My friend told the story.

She has older parents, most of the time living in the country - including in the winter. And here comes to them some neighbor, and says that at night they bring stones from their site. Where is unclear. It feels like it’s underground.

Well, she, of course, was assured that nothing like that could be, there is nothing besides swarms. They calmed as they could and sent them back.

The next day the neighbor comes back. The eyes are red, the night is not asleep. The walls are heartbreaking, right under the ground! Around the snow, silence, occasionally laughing dogs in a remote village. I hear everything from Vertu. The stones, the stones.

Well, my friend’s parents thought that my neighbor was getting mad. The woman is old and lonely.

And the neighbor does not calm down - called the guard to her closer to the evening. They are sitting together, dark.

The next day, they arrived with a guard. He also heard stones. My friend’s father decided to check out what was happening. I went to the neighbor tonight. There is already a guard sitting, shy as a hat in his hands.

The night came. They all went out, came to the fence, listened. Snow under my feet on the frost. And here directly from underneath the snow really come the stones - уууу, уууу, уууу...

My friend’s father is not a timid tenor, he is also an atheist. In the past, a general. But he was very uncomfortable here. Tinnitus on the skin...

He marked the branches of the dry area from which the stones were brought. I decided to wait for spring to find out.

The walls continued for a few nights, and then everything was silent. People in the village terrible place tried to bypass the side.

In the spring, the snow came down, and we all went to the designated place. The loops took holy water for the case.

And they found there four American electronic scammers for cockroaches with vibration. Batteries sat there from the frost, and instead of silent vibration, before the final exhalation, they stood. with different voices.

Fuck, I introduced, I was really scared. The poor neighbor. Crocodile is what?

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №78111
 01.03.2013
When you get up, your friends will know who you are.
When you fall, you know who your friends are.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №78110
 01.03.2013
And I argued with him that if he strikes someone at least once a week when he is driving, he will marry me.

I wonder why she has such a dog that she can't ride a week without an accident?! to

[ + 34 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №78109
 01.03.2013
and Vargas:
I turned on the computer to work and there are no tanks.

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