bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 42 - ] Comment quote №61351
 14.03.2012
Call, at 4 a.m., to the Internet connector of one of the providers, for advertising glued in the entrance.
The client is allo, Ivan?
Ivan is yes.
Q. Are you connected to the Internet?
Yes, am I listening to you?
Q. Can you tell me how to get home?
In the sense?
I went out to smoke in the entrance, feeble, and the door was blocked through, and asking for help like no one?! to
I remember four in the morning.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №61350
 14.03.2012
xxx: power block took today) only 2 regulators unknown there)) hz what they do
XXX: I think I understand. I will turn
yyy: "happiness to turn" this country is invincible!
yyy: "o seem to understand. The words spoken 10 seconds before the Chernobyl disaster!

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №61349
 14.03.2012
Simon Michael Smith: Have you come back with a couple?
It is not Alena.
Simon Michael Smith is very similar.
The first impression is always deceptive.
Simon Michael Smith: My subtle soul organization is broken! I can no longer trust people.
Alenka: It is a pity. They will be missing naive people.
Simon Michael Smith: You raise your self-esteem by trying to humiliate others. You should be 16.
Alenka: How did you know!? to

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №61348
 14.03.2012
A comment to a not very successful avatar of a friend in the VK:
He is the supreme mutant. Too wild to live, too rare to die.

[ + 45 - ] Comment quote №61347
 14.03.2012
<CheMax>: In the night before going to bed, the beloved says: "Let me cling to you closer..." and in a couple of seconds adds: "As long as you are warm"...

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №61346
 14.03.2012
a small dialog in one browser (orthography saved):
How to fall epilepsy?
Epilation is the removal of hair.
This is not your case, it is related to the court. I need an epilation! © by

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №61345
 14.03.2012
D-220 (21:18:52 13/03/2012)
Cuban official will try to live on subsistence minimum - 6500 rubles a month
D-220 (21:19:02 13/03/2012)
He is almost like us.
D-220 (21:19:10 13/03/2012)
We are not living in an experiment.

[ + 48 - ] Comment quote №61344
 14.03.2012
Chat WoT

XXX: Do you take it in your mouth?
YYY: How old are you?
xxx thirteen
No, only 18+
Zzz: What do you do there in the companies when 18+ is required everywhere?

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №61343
 14.03.2012
I am a cool mother in perfection possessing the principle of "time matter, hour matter".
“Vanuša, take away the toys and then Mom will let you wash the floors.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №61342
 14.03.2012
XHH: Judging by how the administration receives our letters, they have a scraper connected instead of a fax.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №61341
 14.03.2012
Conversation with the teacher:
T: Ansanna, is it under the dress?
A (with pity): under the dress they wear a combination, and less - it is under a man.

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №61340
 14.03.2012
I just found a commercial director and a chief executive who googled the meaning of the terms "debit" and "credit"... can’t come together in the meaning of these terms.

Maybe it makes sense to write a statement... before it is too late. In other words, how they continue to work.

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №61339
 14.03.2012
I lie in the hospital. For the first time in my life I had to put a cliché. I proposed to do it myself, but the nurse showed me the door of the room where this mystery was to take place.
The view of this room threw me into great horror: without doors and windows, the paint on the walls has long evaporated, on the ceiling a light bulb, an old ripped couch.
But most importantly - the wall near the couch, covered with an ancient cafeteria tiles. Most of the plates were no longer there.
Apparently the procedure is so sadistic that previous patients broke it with their nails, or teeth, maybe more.
And the afterlife voice of the nurse from behind: “Go, what got up, let’s start right away, I’m ready.”
Half of life passed before my eyes.


[ + 31 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №61338
 14.03.2012
Health is the diseases with which the body is able to live.

[ + 54 - ] Comment quote №61337
 14.03.2012
Natasha is a slim blonde, all so fragile, you can break the look if you embrace her.

Natasha has a car – Suzuki Swift, Natasha loves his car. She lives on the 17th floor.

Every morning, Natasha leaves the entrance with a five-liter bottle of water and goes to the car, and in the evening Natasha pulls a five-liter bottle home.

Do you think Natasha carries an empty bottle at night? The bottle is full! And so every day! Natasha goes out in the morning with a five-litre bottle of water and in the evening enters the entrance with the same bottle. Neighbors have long been staring at Natasha. Everybody wondered what she was doing?

I talked to her, I met her. Everything turned out to be much simpler and more ingenious than you could have thought.

Natasha is very thin and weighs only 47 kilograms. The elevator does not carry it!! The elevator is designed for a minimum of 50 kilograms of weight, so Natasha has to carry a five-litre bottle of water with her every day, because in our house only a cargo elevator works!

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №61336
 14.03.2012
It’s not about you, it’s about me! It’s not your fault that I don’t like boring fat girls.

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №61335
 14.03.2012
[rdee]: we have fun - posted photos from the corporation on the public server. There is full access for everyone. and who then starts wiping out photos that he doesn't like, and we downloaded locally and pour back right away)
Trolley is like that.
So much win!

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №61334
 14.03.2012
xxx:Russ, so tell me why the instructions on the mounting foam bubble the first point is not "dress new sports trousers"?
WOW :))

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №61333
 14.03.2012
What could be more stupid than watching cartoons in HD?

Listen to Lossless


[ + 34 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №61332
 14.03.2012
[21:09:36] Tanya: ppc
Tanya: I don’t know...
[21:10:39] Tanya: Good for all Americans... a bitch? We went to New York for a weekend... to go away... And we have a jump with our electricity revenues in the weekend on the trolley bus can be rounded.
[21:10:49] Tanya: to break up... so to say...

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