About onions and garlic.

Talk to a guy on the phone:
P. What are you doing?
I eat black bread with garlic.
Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm! to
I (not a bit drowned) – Come on!
P. I will come now.
They came and kissed, yes.

Yes, this is the "Speaking Bowl". The moon was and carrots, and jelly, and calves (seemingly, you remembered them as "cows" - puppies with calf heads) that produced this jelly. Really great story.

Recently I get up in the morning much earlier than the alarm clock, and only now I got to - the internal clock moved to summer time :(

I burned yesterday.
Watch another comedy series. The guy answers the girl’s question “how do you feel about my new dress?” using the word courtesan. My eyes look at me and, infection, slightly like this: “You are my curtizana.”
xxxh: from the disassembly he saved only the question asked in time "by the way, what does it mean?"

here here :

Yes, even if men with signs on their necks started walking, it would be great at all! Married, unmarried, virgin, disappointed, shot, with a trailer.
and...

Once in the museum, the tour guide showed a painting, a portrait of a merchant with two young children, and turned our attention to the fact that his engagement ring, if I remember correctly, was worn on his left hand on the index finger. She explained that this position of the ring indicated that the man is widow and is looking for a wife.

If you don’t want to get idiotic advice, don’t share your problems with idiots.

Protected

“The King Makes the Switch”

I parked at the door of Sberkassy.
I walked and was bored, spinning the wheels of my car, while my son in the neighboring neighborhood, somewhere in the middle of the gym, pulled the dust out of his boxing bags.
Here on the door of the sberkassy went out to smoke three heroes - the incassor.
Not bad anymore, at least a spectacle. Two larger and one smaller. All in armor and armor.
Soon, an ordinary man came out of the door with a small black wallet in his hand.
Lopohiy fighter, and he was apparently the eldest, showed his gesture, say, "work", the incassors threw cigarettes into the urn and moved friendly for the protected object - a man with a portfolio.
I still thought: for the rich have a difficult life, without protection nowhere. I wonder what’s in his wallet? Apparently not money, already very thin, not much will go there, from power, packs five. Not the amount that three armed guards followed him to the teeth, and still looked at him with anxiety. Oh, and their machines got stuck, as if they were about to start shooting.

I will never know what this man has in his wallet. Maybe a diamond or a Fabergé egg? Or maybe a billion paper for the presentator?
I wonder which car will they sit in?
The passers stopped and also watched the procession with interest.
And the man, meanwhile, did not rush, went down the ladder, his sight was quite calm and confident and he did not even turn to his protection.
But what is? The guarded object with its portfolio, entered the crowd at the bus stop and stopped, as if together with everyone was going to wait for the route.
Even I was caught with some fuzzy anxiety, everyone present also did not take their eyes off the man and his automakers.
And here, the loophole incassator, loudly:

- Well, all, our mission on this is over, the cargo is entirely on your responsibility.

The man looked around, scaredly looked at his guard and wept:

A A A A A?

He obviously wanted to say something else, but for some reason did not say, and Lopouchi continued:

- The wallet is better to hold with both hands and tightly press to the body, or little or no.

The guards turned and left without saying goodbye.

The object, suddenly left without protection, drove under the eyes of people, instinctively pressed the portfolio to himself and, looking back and forth, quickly walked along the road, on the move, voting to passing cars. Brake some killed "Jigul", without negotiating jumped into it and the car escaped behind the turn.

What fucking thing? Why did a man in such a responsible moment, with all the people, abandon the guard? Better without her. This is idiotic service.

Meanwhile, satisfied incassors climbed the stairs and smoked again at the entrance to the sberkass.
I could not stand it and modestly asked:

Do you not feel sorry for the man? You put him in. What if they are robbed without you?

Three righteous men stumbled and Lopohyi replied:

- Yeah, they didn't have him, he came to Sberkassa for the "communal" to pay. People just like to joke. First, he joked with the cashier, such as, "And your mother doesn't need a son-in-law?" and then, for some reason, he cried out to her, "What about you, here on the announcement of the most stupid, without a sense of humor are recruited?"
And we are also alive people and on April 1st we also have the right to joke a little.
Now let him run, look around and laugh.

Did you know that if you first reduce your salary by 15%, and then raise it by 17%, it will still result in less than the original salary?

I am stuck on the Latvian border. I am reading about a completely ruined Russian industry. Near me in Latvia slowly pass nine cars with "Nivami".

here here :
What if I put the Ring of Almighty on a member?

A lot of people have a fox over their brains, and you want to give him the ring of Almighty?

and XXX:
I saw an advertisement on the column:
"A young family with a dog of the Slavic appearance will take the apartment"

<Bender> Angelofnet: You broke our hopes
<Angelofnet> Bender: And there were many of them in the VAC – those hopes?
<Bender> Angelofnet: Yes
<Angelofnet> Bender: Collect the pieces and lay them on the garden trail. Call it "The Trail of Hope".
<Bender> Angelofnet: go short
<Angelofnet> Bender: Don’t wait. © by
<Bender> Angelofnet: and again you broke hope :(
<Angelofnet> Bender: You seem to have a whole warehouse of unliquid hopes there.

by Habr
Lukashes: My neighbor confused Java and JS, he’s now in the army :)

Eighth, it is time to sleep. I read: "Continue degu at home is recommended by same-sex couples."
xxx: I am wondering why a normal family can’t have this puppy.

Next to the pharmacy, the man at the window of the elderly uncle asks: "Give something for the kidneys". Well, the pharmacist, as it should be - where the prescription, go to the doctor, maybe not the kidneys. And I just finished honey and boast: "You know how to check - kidneys or not? - you need to get up on the heels and sharply down on the heels, if the kidneys - it will hurt.
Guess what 7 people did at the same time?

Meeting at Gazprom:
Discount to Ukraine!
Heroes with discount!
by Anchous

What if I put the Ring of Almighty on a member?

He will disappear.

to there:

In general, the classic classification is:
Girls before puberty
Before the first sexual act
The woman is everyone else.

--------

Have you read dictionaries? Who invented this stupid classification? I quote Ozhegova:

andquot;
The girl:

1st The face of the female sex at the age of transition from adolescence to youth. Boys and girls.

2nd A person who has reached sexual maturity but has not yet entered into marriage.

Three A young maid, a maid in a bar house.) is

and 4. Appeal to a Young Woman (Rasp.and "

No references to virginity and other nonsense.

The son grew up... At the end of the New Year’s Morning, Santa asked the hall playfully: “What do people love the most?”" All the children shouted “Presents!”", and Oleg – “Money!”" and “Power!”".

xxx: the dating site suddenly sent a spam "Hello, Imerek Batkovich! "Johnny, 31" with %sitename% wants to meet".
xxx: Interestingly, it’s nothing that eight years ago on this same site I met "Anna, 24" and the outcome of dating will soon go to school?
No, guys, you won’t put me in this shit a second time.