bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №112295
 19.04.2015
from Kolosovskiys:

Yesterday he made a comment to some young man on the “Porsche” about the excess speed in the pedestrian zone, he began to hammer, then stumbled his fists to move, because he aroused the polite tone and the intellectual coat of my companion - the incident ended expected. Here I insulted the man that he should be more careful to defend himself, more gentle.
And yesterday before the court, I myself struck the guard of the parking lot, who spoke to me in a ham tone - because I was all nervous. A miracle happened.
In the evening, I discuss the situation with the old comrade - that is, yesterday you were scorned, and today I almost sinned, and he told me:
“Yes, I also thought – now in the universe are going to be the most complex processes, our civilization is experiencing some turning point.
Are there video cameras everywhere?
Well, that was what I wanted to say...

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №112294
 19.04.2015
and Ogion:
1st The denial,
2nd and anger,
Three The Tender,
4 is and depression,
5 is the acceptance.

by Sergei Sergeev:
and where
6 is ???? ? to
7 is Profit

by Leonid Tarkin:
A great review of any new game by Ubisoft.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №112293
 19.04.2015
Typical Crossfit Training:
"It is impossible!" said The Reason
"This is an absurdity!!" - noticed by Experience
"It is useless!" - cut the Pride
"What are we doing? You have 5 minutes and 2 rounds. Work!" - He struck his socks in the side of the Coach.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №112292
 19.04.2015
...the pilot in the plane Kaczynski at the last moment about the "Curvy mother" oral, and not "Our Father" read...
==== is
At the edge of death, they remember about the genitals, immoral behavior and close relatives. This proves that absolutely everything (!!!) In the soul are followers of the Fallic cult and the cult of ancestors... Why then hypocrites, Christians and atheists?

[ + 17 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №112291
 19.04.2015
Have you ever dreamed that you were in a crowded place without cowards?
YYU : No. I am a Muslim.
xxx: Well yes, for you, the nightmare is to be in a crowded place without the shaikh belt.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №112290
 19.04.2015
XXX: A friend told me. Call to the Temple Shop:
When are you getting married?
The officer told the rules.
“No, we want to make the wedding a gift, the young people just go to the temple, and then they begin to worship them.

Good that I didn’t order the cut!

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №112289
 18.04.2015
Still, sometimes it’s nice to sit down with people of the same generation with you, like you, remembering films with Celentano.
I cooked my brand hot (I do not cook very often, but I do it well). We sit, drink, eat, I feel why this memorable taste, I say - "Well, in general, everything, as usual, something and something, but there is one secret ingredient..."
What one of the friends immediately asks "You spit there, right?and "

[ + 18 - ] Comment quote №112288
 18.04.2015
Everything is meaningless. If you don’t run away from the maniac, he will knock you with a knife in the side. If you run, the side will collapse on its own.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №112287
 18.04.2015
A person who has worked as a guard for more than five years can solve a scanword with two hands at the same time.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №112286
 18.04.2015
The husband gathers in the night shift and at the same time engages in the hygiene of younger offspring. A friend calls him. I hear my husband answering on the phone:"I am going to work at night, my pop...." I :D slipping from the couch, I ask my husband to clarify that the pop is washing a small child :lol: When my husband realized that he was snooping-they were all crazy.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №112285
 18.04.2015
Jerry is an optimistic, pleasant guy, but he is mentally ill and has not taken the drugs prescribed to him lately. In his hallucinations, he sees his cat offering him to become a serial killer, while his dog tries to convince him that he is a good person.
It is genius.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №112284
 18.04.2015
Twerk had seen it for a long time, as soon as it appeared, perceived it only as a joke.
And, of course, in Russia simply could not not create another artificial hysteria.
For me, from an aesthetic point of view, this dance is neither understandable nor pleasant, but it can be used as an element of dance, imho. It’s just boring to watch it.
And in general, if our gymnasts did not win medals, I think, and they would be subjected to anathema, as preparation for striptease.
We live in times of darkness.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №112283
 18.04.2015
When syphilis was introduced to Europe, people had to learn to abstain for a very long time. When the rubber industry gave a decent response, a reversal took place.

Everyone was pooher and everyone was fucking like rabbits until the 19th century, when infant and child mortality declined. Only the development of medicine has made it possible for women not to be a biomass machine. Yes, for the modern man, syphilis is something terrible, and in a society where the cold is a deadly disease, where wars go every year, where you can be left without harvest and die of hunger simply because the wind did not blow clouds with rain as if it did not make sense, "the cult of death" has remained in Europe since then. A very small percentage of people abstained.

[ + 14 - ] Comment quote №112282
 18.04.2015
I hate people, I hate people.
Do you understand? People have a sense of empathy. It works through the representation of itself in any situation in which another person is.
So here’s when normal people (you remember the definition of the word norm, I hope?) They present themselves as assets or passives, they become disgraced. This is how a flock of wet cattle can be seen in front of you. is sick.
____________________
It’s not empathy but your personal sexual fantasies. And illness, most likely, because of the entanglement of the "moral". Go to a psychiatrist and it will make you easier. And one concerned moralizer will turn into a sexually satisfied common man. True with a high probability also in a gay / bisexual at the same time - but in fact no one is interested in who and how you fuck. If only he would not run with a goat across the city, and he would not go through the passers.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №112281
 18.04.2015
You are not with the church, coincidence, confused?

Any discovery that does not agree with the theory is thrown into the garbage. If scientists find something similar, they’ll tell somebody.
– – – – –
In science, to refute the existing, widespread and respected theory is not only wildly difficult, but also wildly prestigious.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №112280
 18.04.2015
- You just look there, in the guests do not say that Lennochka is pregnant.
Is she pregnant?
Yes, you did not know?
and no. Who else besides me knows?
Everyone knows!

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №112279
 18.04.2015
here here :

Menu and Additional
Services of fast food facilities
"We eat at home!"
Other services include paid
Refusal of Forced Demonstration
Mikhailkov films on screens inside
The premises.
___
Did you mean "paid rejection of compulsory paid demonstration of Mikhalkov’s films"?

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №112278
 18.04.2015
>> The dumb uneducated was just you, and indeed the topic of the appearance of living cells of non-living matter is still unresolved.

Sir, you just left school after ninth grade (well or eighth if old school). In the eleventh/tenth grade of school on general biology this is told in detail.


[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №112277
 18.04.2015
to this:
_____ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
xxx: Harry Potter had a built-in Python interpreter.
_____ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
It was not built. He settled together with the Reddlovsky backpacker.

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №112276
 18.04.2015
I am a staff member, we have a cafe and a night snack. Our songs are separate songs.

After a week in the hospital, I found a minus three footage. It turned out that our 50-year-old carrier, a good man, but slightly sad at the head, fell in love with a 20-year-old dishwasher - a good girl, indeed with a certificate from the correctional school. And it seemed to him that one of the visitors looked at her, and he fought with him, defending the honor of the lady's heart. I was so upset that I went to a psychiatric hospital. Mother of the house, picking up the "wives" on the street, got a cold, angina. The sanitary technician, the best friend of the carrier, was so worried, while the carrier was sought through all the hospitals and morgae, that he went into drinking.

When I found out all this, I had one thought: how boring and boring I live with my family, two jobs, work and training.


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