Advertising texts in the rhythm about BigMac and snickers, it’s definitely cool. But they still do not compare in the power of the impact with the work that I had to see when entering the gasoline toilet on the route "Moscow-Minsk" - "To the toilet go our, all the neighbors - MIRAGE!"

News from [acre:
>>Google Chrome supports gay people
>>Google is the most respected company in the United States

Two friends are talking:
I had that dream today!!! to
Q2: What is it?
I was a man!! Are you pretending?
2nd WOW! Well, I hope you’ve groomed?
P1: No...
Q2: Did you write in the shower?
P1: No...
Q2: Did you fuck me?
P1 and AA!
Q2: Oh you are beautiful!
Give me five!* is

Shop and Buy Players. Dialogue between a sales consultant (P) and a 19-year-old girl (D):

(D): Tell me, are there any other color variations of this model?
We do not have stock at the moment. What does the pink color not please you?
Q: Why is it not suitable? I am a girl, and nothing pink is foreign to me.

I sit behind the comp, I don’t bother anyone, suddenly a girl knocks in the ass, typically let’s get to know. Well, there was nothing to do anyway, I wrote to her in response, and we met. I sit down and she asks me what my height is.
I say 190.
She is surprised: in the cm???? to
Not in millimeters :)
She: In fact, I was asking about normal growth, not about that. The perverted.
It ignores me.
O_O

Mother of the Twins says:

We came back from a walk with the children and my husband's sister, waiting for my husband near the entrance.
A positive guy sits on the bench with a beer, naturally asks about children, health happiness, and so on.
Then he asks: “Girls, a modest question, and how is it, to give birth? It hurt? What does it look like, stomach or teeth?
We, quietly sliding, trying to explain something about the pain and joy of motherhood, the guy goes away for a short time and gives:
"A, it’s kind of like a crack!!and "
Suitable for husband:
"Yes, only with football balls!and "

What is an epilator for you?
[18:46:55] Olga: I was answered here that [18:44:43] Catherine: this is the mochnodralnik of the times of the Inquisition.

Hi sweetheart, how is life?
WOW: very good
Q: Listen, I wanted to offer you for a long time? Maybe we go somewhere? Go to the cinema, then go for a walk. How do you have the idea?
WOW: It is great! Come on Saturday!
Let’s go to the cinema first! Then on the beach drinking beer, you can take the girls off! How about you? Then go to the sauna, or we’ll call a prostitute there! We decide shorter.
I don’t really understand you’re joking?
WOW: In short, listen to me, if you look at my girlfriend again, I’ll make you a panda, and I’ll break my hands, you know?
P.S. in the bathroom

I am 22 years old. I will never have an apartment in this country because I won’t earn that much. I won’t have a family because I barely have enough money for myself. I will not have personal and spiritual growth, because I will choke to loss of consciousness. I do not realize myself as a specialist because my dignified, difficult and interesting profession is not in demand. I can’t leave this country because escaping from my favorite places won’t make me happy.
I can’t depend on my husband because he can leave me. I cannot steal. I can’t make money as a man.
We are a generation without a future. Teach us to shoot.

The chat game.
XXX: What is a Wizard?
yyy: a list of things you will never get
*zzz went to add to the puzzle list

I am a girl from a wealthy family, Daddy offered to drive to Spain for a weekend.
I called my boyfriend, and he, the cable, refused!!!! to
Is that normal???? to
And who knows what is "Buried a Card"?? to

Today our beloved Putin arrived in Volgograd. They watched a picture: on one of the streets, which the prime minister was supposed to pass, there were haishniki standing and chasing all those who wanted to park. At the moment of passing the court, one of the goats ran into a nearby bank, and the other hid in the bushes!!! After passing the cortex, they safely got out of their shelters. The prime minister saw the streets clean for cars to move! The Kindergarten...

<zebra> somewhere on the way from us to the customer lost a fan weighing half a ton =)))
<lynx> zebra: he committed himself and flew away
<@H2S04> the instinct of self-submission

I encountered on the page of a cute girl)) I just couldn't help but get that joy in you))
Enjoy it 😉

During such parties in his house, it was always easy to encounter famous personalities. There was such a fire in his eyes that he became cold. Her flesh opened up and gathered around him, as if it was a secret project. With one powerful push, He entered her, and she stood astonished by His accuracy. In just two days she fell in love with him at first sight.The whole figure of her said that she was listening to him not only with her ears, but also with her eyes.
Deep in his chest, he heard a laugh. Two moths near the right girl's whisk jumped fun to the side! They never met. They were like two colibri who never met. His thoughts rolled in his head, uniting and disconnecting, like cowards in a dryer without an antistatic. His beautiful, dotted with something shiny head. Her curly nose smoothly passed into her labyrinth neck. Her figure was the most ordinary, female: on the sides two convex bugs, and in the middle curved. She was given a glass of wine, and he drank vodka with vodka. Wearing a shirt and beautiful pants with an open collar, he left the house.

I met with a friend yesterday. After work, he just arrived on vacation from Dacia. The dialogue:
I: Well, how did you get rid of it?
I just forgot the wedding ring!
I: That’s why my wife cried, right?
D: No, not the norm. She walks without a ring.
I: What is it?
She lost him in the bathroom at the wedding.

One man has been with me for a long time. And on my replicas about "everything is terrible", "how can" and all that said about like you. This is the calm look of a man who does his business, looks around and believes in the future of Russia, his family and all that. So one day I open a friend and read his post: All I got a residence permit in New Zealand and get out of this terrible country.
And now I am interested in reading his beautiful records about life in New Zealand.

If you have not found yourself, then not everything is lost.

Listen to the story of your birthday.
Three months ago, a small but proud insurance company celebrated the anniversary of the director. 50 years is a beautiful figure and, from any side, wonderful. It is as solid as well as the strength to rejoice in life.

Since the anniversary was a company man and with understanding, the employees decided to play him. Half an hour before the boss came to work, the insurers asked the guard for the keys from the director's office and brought a huge cake there. But not just a cake, but a cake with a secret – it was covered with a large glass cap, stood on a large wooden box, and there was a red button on the box itself. If you press that button, the cover moves, and the insurance agent, who is hiding in the box, squeezes the director’s cake straight in the face. This is a foolish joke. A new shirt for the director was already prepared, the second cake was in the refrigerator – so there shouldn’t have been any victims in this story.

However, there was a small trouble. Secretary Olya, closing the director's office, was so nervous that she accidentally dropped the key band on her shoe. The foot in the shoe crashed involuntarily - and the keys flew straight into the gap between the door and the floor. After a moment, the keys were in the director's office, and out of the reach of the hand or swab.
You can imagine the situation, right? In the box, there is a twisted insurance agent who cannot get out without pressing a button, and it is impossible to enter the cabinet, because the only keys are on the floor in the same cabinet.
How to?

Frightened insurers ran to the guard - is there no spare key?
The guard opened the door with their hands - there is no key, they are not trained to handle the doors, but we will help to break the door. Soon there was a consensus - to break the door or wait for the permission of the director? They decided to break. If the agent is sitting in the box for half an hour or more, he will suffocate or lose consciousness, so there is nothing to wait for someone's orders, you need to save a life.

Two of the strongest security guards and the strongest insurance agent began to knock the door with their whole body. But here is the trouble – the house was Stalinic, and the door was the most powerful, thorough, of the best oak, so that three healthy men after a five-minute struggle only found their side. The tension increased.
What to do?! Can we drink the castle? He proposed one of
The Insurers.
We cannot succeed.
Yes, we will not succeed. Need to quickly.
and Eureka! Have you all seen the light? The helmet here, the helmet!

Strangely enough, the helmet was found by the guard. And here is the picture - a powerful guard, fiercely turning his eyes, began to crush the oak door with the sign "Director" with a tail. All this happened under the bloodthirsty cries of employees:
Go to!
Break up stronger!
and crush! Fight out of all!

At that moment, the late director finally entered the office. For two minutes, shocked, he watched a terrible scene worthy of some witch shabash. And it was only then that he was noticed, and by another coincidence, the first one to do this was a guard with a towel - a fierce, with a sweaty and red face:
“Good morning, Mikhail Nikolaich. Happy Birthday Day. We see – how
When we wait for you...
The director slowly slipped to the floor.

Gas and oil belong to the people. It is understandable. I don’t understand why people sell them to themselves for such angry money.

Scientists say that 97% of humans, if they are offered a new pen, will first write their name.
XHH: judging by the cardboard in the kiosk of ropechati, which lies at the window, the pen is purchased by 3% of the population of the planet