bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 46 - ] Comment quote №30355
 22.05.2010
Well, how can you explain, a good admin is like a hardworking gardener. First pick up the seeds (preferring perennial varieties), then for a long time crawl through his garden with the sun-burned cockerel, swollen from the mosquito physiognomy, and hands on the elbow in the... km. humus. But then every morning he goes out to the doorstep, and, tasting a hot cup of coffee, he is quite shaking, watching everything grow, how the vigor rejoices, flying from flower to flower. Well, of course, the master's eye notices where the plum, where the beetles to cut off, and where the garbage to fill.
However, it happens that it will catch him such a rancidity-acidity, so tired of the eye of well-being and sleepy order, that he gets drunk, takes the scratching ribbons and cheerfully runs through his garden. And the surroundings say it scares the crows. And they believe.

[ + 96 - ] [4 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №30354
 22.05.2010
to this

Oh guys, the cry of the soul.

Many cheeses stopped melting in the microwave : (
Here is the conspiracy!

It’s not funny, but support my humble grief.

__________
When I had a piece of butter "oil" did not melt on a heated bowl, I initially smoked this glucose I tried

[ + 81 - ] Comment quote №30353
 22.05.2010
Chuvakou, who drove on the Bolshevik Avenue on the 19th and pulled everyone out of the car with the white from the ice age, a huge respect!
You were on the bus, you raised people’s mood in the traffic jams.

[ + 83 - ] Comment quote №30352
 21.05.2010
now watched the old series of Our Rush about oligarchs, there begins:"Soon we will live so well that all Russians will ride with flashes..." It happened))))

[ + 62 - ] Comment quote №30351
 21.05.2010
From the Presidential Blog
The Visitor:
I know that in politics we have a friendly relationship with Ukraine. It is wonderful! But will we not pay for this friendship with the final collapse of our economy? I do not know this...
The President:
Do not worry! In politics and economics, we are not idiots.
The Visitor:
I don’t know that either...

[ + 60 - ] Comment quote №30350
 21.05.2010
<Mudachevsky> Hello to everyone
<Mudachevsky> Oops what I have nick. Long time not seen from the note.

[ + 109 - ] Comment quote №30349
 21.05.2010
I sit at work, on my elbow.
Next to me is the accountant:
"Comrade Admin, what are you talking about?
Would you rather say – is Windows hanging?"
I’ll tell this fox, I’ll tell this fox,
Recalling his mother...
It opened in outlook.
Weight of a dozen megawatts.
"You are here, BL@, sent a letter by mail,
This is a bad file!"
The accountant is uninterrupted,
It was so funny that @Blo...
"Comrade Admin, what are you talking about here?
Are you Russian? I want to speak Russian!"
"Work Accountant, YOU, BL@, NOT P@3DITE!!! to
@BALNIKO look here, your mother!! to
You see the file. In the file is a Trojan.
Pornography is distracting you.
Dr@chatt you want - Dr@chatt you want!
Newspapers to J@P! Everyone enjoys the eye.
Let’s get rid of the megaphones!
After all, somewhere on soap one p@dores
You will get the entire database of mail contacts!
Remember, it’s all because of you!and "
The accountant listened, suddenly sitting on a chair.
When you look at the monitor, everything is broken.
"Comrade Admin, this is all interesting.
But better say – is Windows hanging?"

[ + 67 - ] Comment quote №30348
 21.05.2010
The teacher of philosophy well spent time at fishing and came to class in a form not very fresh. Read the lecture:
"Look at it here! You don’t know what the dawn is. You have not seen the dawn. Listen to! The sun rises slowly, rises, rises – and here it is! It is up! and Pause
The truth in what? And the truth, dear friends, is that
(pause)... and the truth is that my head hurts terribly!"

[ + 70 - ] Comment quote №30347
 21.05.2010
Before the first week:
When can you give us your ticket numbers?
At least now. Write the first, second, third...

[ + 51 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №30346
 21.05.2010
Once a “audio expert” was placed in front of a sound-transparent curtain, and asked to evaluate the sound. He said that it's not bad in general, but the bases are not elastic enough, and the tops are sharp. Then the curtain was removed. There was no technique behind it. There were four living musicians - a string quartet.

[ + 64 - ] Comment quote №30345
 21.05.2010
The director of the scandalous “School” tried to reduce the accounts with life.
But by the habit of doing everything rough - I couldn't even do that.

[ + 52 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №30344
 21.05.2010
Every guy was confident that I was his "the best" and "the gift of fate," and I was afraid to break his dreams with my admission that I was an ordinary fool.

[ + 87 - ] Comment quote №30343
 21.05.2010
almost business correspondence)

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah
WOW –?? to
You know he’s always lying on my chest at night while I’m reading books.
I am starting to suspect.
Ohh - I put the book on the stomach, he has no place to lie down, he first tried to sneeze it, then he started to bite, now I let his nails work.)))
Wow, let’s go there more carefully, yet the poltos gave for it.
hhh - ah, my catayko mega destroyer of notes, procrastinate his nakhen ))

..........the next day

Ohh - listen... here's the thing... short I drove the cat yesterday to the floor for the night, so this fucking code I slept reminded straight on the key, and powerful so, liquid ((( short... how much do you say there for it gave?and (
Yippidy yi yippity yay.

[ + 79 - ] Comment quote №30342
 21.05.2010
Previously, there were two amins in a poor, dull, small cellar. For the sake of some entertainment pulled the great one of the employees, connected to the dynamo an old switch and let the pedals spin. So in 10 minutes, the director came to us with noise and laughter. From the moment I opened my eyes, I looked at him, not noticing him, crazy pedals. and further:
by Dir. What is X doing here? (I am frightened to turn)
Do you think the internet is just like that? (Touch the finger on the inscription on the monitor "network cable is not connected")
My friend is No-ka, Egor, hold on!
I start rotating the pedals again. It pops out the inscription "Connection by bla bla bla..."
The boss whispered and went out silently.
In a week we are five. We live in a spacious office with air conditioning. They raised the salary a little. And all in good physical shape, thanks to two cyclists.

[ + 74 - ] Comment quote №30341
 21.05.2010
About the Google TV announcement:

xxx: We are waiting for Google Washing Machine to find a second socks. and :)

[ + 90 - ] Comment quote №30340
 21.05.2010
I work Sis. admin (explanation of untouchability)

No money, the advance is delayed. I took the guitar and went to the front door. He started playing the song about the boy Bobby who loved money. The voice of heads. The bucha through laughter and tears barely made "Enter, advance ladies".
The entire department was raised for another 15 minutes.

The Doctor Hexes.

[ + 54 - ] Comment quote №30339
 21.05.2010
thx ‎(21:41):
Do you have my mobile number?
yyy(21:42 ) :
Of course to give?

[ + 67 - ] Comment quote №30338
 21.05.2010
by T0P4:
Have you heard of next week?
Glinka is:
Yes Yes
Starting from Monday

[ + 89 - ] Comment quote №30337
 21.05.2010
The fire of the day xD
XHH: We have a metallic valasata, and here the caroche hit a meat rapper on him, and he gave all the fucking silent breaths of only one phrase: "and all this tells me the imitator of the black-massed Pindos biddle... "
WOW: O_O
HHH: Yes, it was with this face that the rapper stood when we left :D:DxD

[ + 58 - ] Comment quote №30336
 21.05.2010
Nastya Ershova: You need to be able to correctly formulate your thought regardless of its presence
This is about my diploma.

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna