bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №113299
 12.05.2015
There lived a family.Mom, Dad and two sons.One in the universe is studying,the other is still in school.Mom-mortified housewife.Cools-washes-cleans.Flowers grows.I don't even know where/how/how/how much for the light are paid.Here is only the husband suddenly died.Unfortunate accident at work.And there was an absolutely helpless woman who did not work in her life for a single day.The elderly found a job, transferred to a residence.Because my mom can only at home, and he can not work.And these are real people, I know them personally.For nothing I will abandon the job,even if my husband will be a billionaire.

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №113298
 12.05.2015
How can I plan my life?
Moreover, decide how the other person will treat you?
Only in youth they say this:
I will get an education, defend a dissertation, make a career for this age.
At the age of 27, I will enter into a happy marriage with an ideal man, have two children and a cat.
And life makes its corrections, unfortunately.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №113297
 12.05.2015
The Russians are the coolest people in the world! They Sinked the World and Burned Progress

[ + 20 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №113296
 12.05.2015
No, well, if you imagine a housewife like a girl in uniform changing my ashes every 5 minutes, then yes, not many could afford it. But to hire a neighbor's grandmother for a cupcake, so that she could wash - she washed the floor while adults were at work and work, and the children went to schools, cooked food, watched the little ones, who had no extensions - this was what many could afford in Soviet times. and allowed. Because where is it. The words "home worker" and "naja", however, no one has used, it is yes.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №113295
 12.05.2015
This is:

Everyone speaks discs, monitors with black and green lighting.
I fucking got the bills! They multiplied and divided them. Are you weak?! to

This is how they get in the shops once in a while. In other words, the sellers count on them. seen many times.
But the logarithmic line is out of use for some reason. I have it, it’s a very comfortable thing. Especially energy independent. and :-)

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №113294
 12.05.2015
My uncle gave my son a guessing coin. On the one hand "Sex" on the other "Sex". I’m somewhat stout to give a guy at 19 years of "Oblom" in sex. I want there to be hope. I cannot give a gift. I give with a comment that said, don’t believe, "Oblom" is a shit. What Chao responds to:
Don’t tell me, if with a laboratory chemistry, it’s better to break than sex.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №113293
 12.05.2015
A husband to his wife, looking at a capricious two-year-old child: What do you think when he stops pretending to be small?

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №113292
 12.05.2015
LIFE from trouble.

Trouble, trouble and nervousness.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №113291
 12.05.2015
>>> man was virtually on the verge of madness all these damned hundred or two hundred meters...
For the first time, I remember, I walked all the way "mama, mom"
Many times I don’t even remember how I got there, all like in the fog.

I spoke recently with a man. I told him how he went to paintball. As he started, he ran over, looked around, shot, looked around. He shot again.
In 2000, a man stormed the Minute Square in Grozny. He listened to me a long time and smiled. In the end he said, "In short, I will not take you with me in the attack."
Fuck them. He is more visible.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №113290
 12.05.2015
To all those who argue about the influence of the movie "Maleficent" on the psychic of children:

The rating of the tape is 12+ and "Parental presence is recommended".

If you are a parent, be present. And explain all the complex, incomprehensible or simply “wrong” scenes from your point of view. Talk to the child. Speak to. Tell "what the author wanted to say" and what you think about it. Bring your point of view on this world, (uncertain article), since you are a parent.

Or it turns out straight classic "we don’t like how television raises our children, let’s ban bad channels".

And the age after 12 years is precisely the time when the child can already understand that the world is not divided into black and white, and artistic characters can have complex. Multiple characteristics.

Mother of a 9-year-old girl.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №113289
 12.05.2015
M@ry > I don’t know what I want more. And the maid is good, but I need a dress... And there are more clay boots!
Mr. proud > Well you’ll decide how to do it.
M@ry > Don’t go crazy, or I won’t buy anything at all!!! to
Mr. proud > Are you threatening me now? and :)
M@ry > Damn..

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №113288
 12.05.2015
I remember, the fellow girl was chewing in very original clothes and brought offgenic snacks, then salads, then pets. Her mother did not work, and her father was a military officer. Once again, considering her update - a very interesting style, and even the buttons were sewn different, under the color of the strips, said that her mother has no price.
and yes! She agreed heavily. – My mom is great!
Do you want to wear your daughter too? And cooking the same?! to
There was horror in her eyes.
No, for no reason, never! Washing, washing and cooking.I will never be a housewife.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №113287
 12.05.2015
As shown by:

The men, wow! Are you still here? Do you think your wife wants to work or not?
-
Well I am. I say for myself – I don’t want my wife to work because: 1) I want to find cleanliness, comfort and dinner there when I come home from work in the evening; 2) I consider it unfair to her to require her to do all this and to go to work.
--------
1) He was asked what his wife wanted, he replied what he wanted.
2) To do something at home alone - a thousand, it wasn't a baron!

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №113286
 12.05.2015
and Oroua:

<...> What to do if suddenly this situation, and you have experience only washing, smoothing, and cooking food?
It is ===
You can, for example, open a mini-hotel, a hostel, or as it is called there.
But, of course, crying and complaining about life is much easier.
/////////////////////////////
Yes, without initial capital, administrative experience or at least some business education, immediately open a hotel and wash, smooth, cook! Because that’s the most important thing in the hotel business, ah. With such skills only to hire a cleaner in an existing hotel, and they can not take without hotel experience in this business.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №113285
 12.05.2015
- [12.5.2015, 08:56]: I kneeled without any special problems and removed the starter. There was an effort of about 350 nm (if not more). To remove the bulb from place.
- [12.5.2015, 09:11]: Nifiga what data... I when the shift turned off I had to attach a pipe and spell -ohebenarotdanihera secure

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №113284
 12.05.2015
This is:

In a real equal relationship, a man will not make a woman a gift more expensive than she has the opportunity to give him in return.
and...
Do not confuse equality with equality. Or do you think a woman should have time to work at home and make money?

And about gifts... with your own hands holy and broken shell with initials, how will you appreciate it? Materials for pennies, and many days of manual work.
and...
In an equal relationship, both partners can both work at home and earn money. My wife and I are both engineers and we work in different companies. Work at home is divided roughly equally and completely interchangeable. In slippery situations (I am bad with cooking, and my wife had a tough day) I order to eat something delicious for the house: both are full, at the same time variety, or we go somewhere in the cafe. It is necessary to understand that work at home is an inevitable evil, so to drop it on someone, if both work, at least there is disrespect for the partner. And working and conducting a farm is not a nonsense for a long time, so does every first independent person.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №113283
 12.05.2015
I work in the polar circle. We have a driver, Madeleine. He brings a 5 litre bottle, begins to cut off the top. I ask if they gathered? by Kalyan! brought a stone, pushed it there...I grum, how will you smoke it? Why do you smoke? – Why do you smoke? Kalanchoe to catch!
p.s The fish are like that, the fish will understand.

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №113282
 12.05.2015
Mother of you! I am at the post office to send an ordered letter. A crowd of pensioners with packages of receipts. People are full, the window is natural, one. The tail has already climbed behind me. Pensioners, next to Sberbank, what fucking deal with your tickets to the mail!?!Oh, how they all went out! We went, we went and we will go, and you are not a decree to us here!" In the bank, the receipts will be replaced, the delivery will not be given, and the receipts are fake!
"Why are they fake?"
"Because the ink burns out of the ticket, after a year it is no longer visible!"
There is an offer - let then letters and packages Sberbank issue!

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №113281
 12.05.2015
What did our great-grandparents shout when they came to attack?
I remember a conversation with my grandfather. About "Ura, and for Stalin" said about this...
When you get up from the pit and run away, you experience universal horror and fear.
It is only one thing to get up and run and it is expensive, many were kicked up and the commanders raised guns and guns.
The man was virtually on the verge of madness all those damned hundred or two hundred meters.
For the first time, I remember, I walked all the way "mama, mom"
Many times I don’t even remember how I got there, all like in the fog.
After... when it seemed like "mama" was ashamed to scream, oral matto, and didn't even understand what.
Madness, fear, anger, can this be said again?
(He was very proud of it. That EIGHT months was at the forefront before being injured, when an average of THREE MONTHS and... or in the hospital, or at the hospital...) was called in 1943, was 18 years old...

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №113280
 12.05.2015
I can't wash my favorite cat from the oil.
-------------------
and easy.
1st and breem.
2nd We washed out.
Three We give her forgiveness.
4 is ...??? to
5 is Profit to!! to

As an option - after item 2, we sell as a sphinx and buy five new cats.

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna