bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №128893
 01.06.2016
Change the old piece:

The Prime Minister said to us: "Hold on!"
I suggested not to disappoint.
We had previously swallowed,
Now what to suck?

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №128892
 01.06.2016
I work in an apartment repair company. I went with my partner on order yesterday. The apartment is new, with bare walls. My grandmother at the age of 60, very educated. She told the front of work, said if she would be in a neighbor's apartment and asked to work quietly. We kicked, she went away.

The channels began to be drawn. During the break between the striking, I heard someone knocking on the battery. Well, as if the noise of the perforator did not decrease, we continued. Then she came and said in a raised tone that we are working very loudly and if we don’t stop bullying she will call the police. The time was day-to-day, according to the law, and we did repair it! She did not hear all our explanations and her clever and decent appearance did not want to understand anything.

We called the boss, he said that the contract..., don’t pay attention... continue to work.

We continued to work. and HOA! She came with the police! After her explanations, they said they would get it done and left.

Then the boss came... and eventually she broke the contract with us.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №128891
 01.06.2016
There’s a guy at work who sometimes comes with a wireless vacuum cleaner and cleans the printers. I recently bought a new Lada. Soaked though.

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №128890
 01.06.2016
Thats the frog. Cats have eaten my ears. I hate.
Elphantine in its own juice.

(It’s about silicone elephant ears, but Wau didn’t need that explanation.)

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №128889
 01.06.2016
Flint> You have money, and the phone is like a poor man.
<Zayus> Why do I need a new phone if everything is broken?
<Flint> oh... so you’re a niche.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №128888
 01.06.2016
Give you your dumb thoughts about the cracks on debt.will you write in a notebook and burn the apartment with him?

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №128887
 01.06.2016
xxx: Hugged an ancient discussion on the topic of "selinux vs apparmor" (there is not about this, but about everything in a row, but also about this too), I read-progress - iiiiiiiiiiiii!!!! I find my own comment.
XXX: I am an old man.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №128886
 01.06.2016
Good people are very, very scary. Hosted with relatives in a village house, bought as a country, listened to the conversation of the neighbors about the superheavens.

You can, of course, go to the grandmother and bring a curse, but it is a sin. It is better to sincerely wish you health and put a candle for health in the church. Natalia says she did so with her neighbor, he died six months later!

The next day, the uncle said, “Hello,” I was somehow unwell.

[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №128885
 01.06.2016
@"The government just did what the medicine of the first necessity (i.e. According to the definition of the most expensive goods) were with a minimum price..."

No the native. The government has set a maximum price for pharmacy leave, not a maximum percentage of the fee. Then the #Namkrish and other import substitutes crashed, the dollar from the euro jumped and the farms stopped producing these medicines, because of this. The cost of their production has become higher than the maximum vacation price from pharmacies. The blame, of course, is business, Obama, Poroshenko and other reptiles.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №128884
 01.06.2016
.........
HH: You will see him. Send it.
WOW: He doesn’t talk to me.
Sanya too. So both fall out. Take it yourself.
HH: What happened then?
They won a box of whiskey.
XHH: And what?
Oh no no no! We once folded. We stayed overnight on the island. The camp was destroyed, the bowl is prepared. Here three girls sail to us and ask neighbors to sleep. I am sitting behind the doorstep. I cannot see, I cannot hear.
Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
WOW: These two saw the most beautiful one, and make plans to build on it. And I listened, listened, and then bet with them on the box that I would not even move my finger and she would lie with me.
I realized that you won. And how?
Yes, it was a female.
Q: Is it your ex?
WOW : Well.
This is what you are ? ? ? ? ?

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №128883
 01.06.2016
But still they do not want a room in the public office, but a separate apartment and a car by 20 years. By the way, the arithmetic problem: the price of the car is 10k rubles, how many months the engineer Petrov had to eat the holy spirit to accumulate enough money to buy and how many months will it take now for the modern masterpiece of the domestic automotive industry, if he is a good engineer? What conclusions can be drawn from the obtained values?

<><><>>
The Soviet poem:

Refusing to eat,
I put off a thousand times a year.
In two dozen years.
Sitting in his "Volga" my skeleton.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №128882
 01.06.2016
vvv: Whenever I encounter such “all-understood” I remember how my eldest son at the age of 5 said “I now know all mathematics, only the multiplication table remains to be learned.” Now, as a student of MFT, he started not knowing much more ;)

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №128881
 01.06.2016
As Magomed Mamedov wrote to us in the edition, he gave the oak to the Russian on his foot!

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №128880
 01.06.2016
As the great Lenin said, "You must firmly remember that of all the arts for us the most important is the art of sleeping in seven hours or less."

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №128879
 01.06.2016
A private person who doesn’t marry girls, you’re so funny.
You don’t take female workers. Okay well. You decided it for yourself.
So why are you stumbling?? to
Does someone force you? ......
Or... no, it can’t be! Or even conscience?

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №128878
 01.06.2016
xxx: in clothes she adheres to a free style. This time she was wearing a shirt, a valley.

and Sombrero

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №128877
 01.06.2016
“I got caught up in the saleswoman like a clover. He was silent as a partisan. But I was more encephalitic.” It is a metaphor!

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №128876
 01.06.2016
No any problems. As long as the male has a grandmother, there will always be a desired breeder.

Dick and vice versa. As long as there is a bubble, even very small, there are always hot students kissing my cellulite and wrinkles ;)

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №128875
 01.06.2016
Astrologers announced a week of ambulance.
The number of ambulatory patients has doubled.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №128874
 01.06.2016
Every time I read a quote here, about the fact that astrologers announced a week of something there, the memories are flooded, and I am stuck in the heroes all night)))) thank you, man reminding us why we are here!!! to

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