Father’s friend is called by advertisers on mobile. The mobile phone on the site of arrival is displayed. The case in Omuri (which is important). Then the dialogue in translation, at that end judging by the accent - the black aunt (which is also very important).

Hello, can I talk to Mr. Panteleimon?
YYY: On the phone – no, not.
XXX Why?
YYY: He is dead.
XXX How?! to
yyy: He was caught, imprisoned, tortured and killed.
XXX in jail! Who is!! to
What does "who" mean? The government of course.
XXX: It can’t be.
YYY : Believe me. In the year 305 of our era. In the bondage. It is saint. The Martyr. You call the church.

My aunt has three grown-up sons, and with all three sisters, if you listen to her, it’s not lucky. The elder’s wife at the time of the wedding was a student and “didn’t imagine anything.” The younger's wife - "Of course, it is good that with education and her apartment, but old-fashioned, all 25 years!" (Tanya's aunt herself gave birth to the first child at 32, but who cares in particular). When about the upcoming acquaintance with the bride announced the average, the whole clan with curiosity died. She just defended her diploma, worked in her father's business, worked on a model.

- There is no good light in the eyes, - summed up the aunt and went to suffer from the lack of perfection in the world.

I always like to hear about forensic-linguistic examinations) I always present a dozen clever eye-bearded uncles at the table, a dictionary on the table.

So let’s start?

* Press the dictionary button, there is a loud "Gone Naked"

What do you think of that, colleagues?

I was flying in my dream today.
You are growing.
At my age, they no longer grow.
They grow. In the width.

This is like people are invented very competently, such a complex system of organs, and everything works! I think this is still a beta version. Several bugs are thrown into the eyes. There are nails on the legs, for example, a nail is not needed. You don’t go down the trees, you have to cut them all the time. And the appendix also doesn’t need toughs... And the teeth of wisdom... And the fools also:

I once was a biker.
with a horse untouched,
with a head shrinking,
With a leather belt.
Now I am married,
I have a mortgage.
and two sprinklers,
Puzzles and passes.

We are in Vladivostok. Often there is a misunderstanding about the time zones with the Moscowis. A colleague during another quarrel with the head office in Moscow:
“Yes, I understand that you think of yourself as the brain and that we are the ass of the world. But if the body begins to work while the brain is still asleep, it usually leads to sad consequences.

XXX: It is time to build data centers on the moon for backpacks.
YYYYYYYYYYYYYY And send a daily backup there with a pack of disks using a catapult.

Diamond: Until I got married, I didn’t know that it was possible to remove milk from the refrigerator incorrectly.

In Ufa revealed a religious sect of treating with cloth and healing water. This sect is called "The Legacy of Ancestors".

Wrong like a butterfly, miserable as a bee. Be like a puppy! ))

To this:...I begin to slowly remember: the realtorcha works in Peter, in the Petrograd district...

There is an old Peter’s joke:
The inhabitants of the Petrograd side walk only on large and small, and the inhabitants of Vasilyevsky Island also on the medium.

Notice from Habra on the most interesting articles. Two titles in a row:
Yandex employees will represent Russia in the C++ standardization committee
"Why I no longer use modern C++"

I will answer :)

The question has been tormented for a long time...
Girls with poor vision, how do you paint your eyes without glasses?

How and how. Close to the mirror(( Before I finally bought contact lenses, I painted my eyes, practically leading my nose through the mirror (vision -9, so it’s not an exaggeration at all)

Here you are planting potatoes sober. Mosquitoes and mosquitoes eat you for nothing. You are nervous, you are psychic.
And you plant potatoes for 150-200 grams. mosquitoes and the mosquitoes eat you in vain. You laugh and think. Well well. I have 2 liters of salt in the refrigerator in the morning... but here you, Scuchi, tomorrow from the bowl go... go to the sea to fly...

111>>> Beer makes a man more feminine
222>>> I have been brewing beer daily from 1 to 4 liters for 15 years, the breasts and pulses have not grown...
111>>> And women are with zero size... What did they do wrong?
222>>> Oh, all

oldvagrant: And on a bridge that does not stand, what is the point of drawing a member?
I see no point in drawing anything on any member. No, to something interesting - well a fish there or a horse - it is. I can paint him and I can paint him.
So why paint a horse?
Even if you can be operated. Like Shishkin with this like him. You draw a member and a colleague draws a horse to him.

All this mess reminds me of the case when the employer was looking for a commercial director, and necessarily a man, because the woman in the decree will leave.
He removed a bunch of class candidates only because of the shape of their genitals. He was a good comedian - a man with experience and a head, and generally, most importantly, a man.
And after six months, the man applies to him on the table - in child care leave. up to three years. But he paid him white, and his wife had a large, but black, and she does not have a child. Well, they decided to do so where more money would come out. She is at work, her husband is on vacation.
You will not escape fate.

Indicate the author:
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Did you know that 85.31% of serial killers consumed sodium chloride no more than twenty-four hours before killing?? to
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Arya D'Ontsova "Salt imbalance"