bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №143489
 31.07.2017
The State Duma has adopted amendments to the recent law on resort collection.
It is assumed that after their approval, the fee will be paid by all Russian citizens who refused to travel for at least a day to the resorts of Crimea or Krasnodar Territory.

[ + 20 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №143488
 31.07.2017
To try to make a foldable machine gun-gun decided to do Tula weapons makers, and achieved that in the folded form the weapon even to the weapon was unlike, although in the folded only separately resembled a machine gun-gun..."

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №143487
 31.07.2017
How to wake up when the alarm is silent when the alarm is silent?

I think you can put the mode "in the plane"

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №143486
 31.07.2017
To have a flat stomach, you need to eat flat food.
diamant: pizza, chocolate, blend

[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №143485
 31.07.2017
Maximum of 10:12
Do you like to humiliate boys?
Go to Skype? I’ve got my sisters, I can beat myself with a belt on the pope, or I can just call you a lady and do your orders.

Crisis 10:27
I want you to strangle yourself with at least a 20cm toy.

Crisis 22:13
Where are you, Maxim?Oh, what men they went for!

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №143484
 31.07.2017
I watch a video showing the acoustic systems. I catch myself on the thought that I need a good and high-quality sound, I would have such an acoustic, but then it comes to me.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №143483
 30.07.2017
On the street, an intelligent elderly woman sadly says to a small hairy dog, clinging to the necklace:
“Sorry, but we’ve already found out – you’re not capable of civilized actions. Not capable!

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №143482
 30.07.2017
Mom smoked the salad from the table accidentally.
XXX in the Dresden
xxx: shouted "eyeee, halk crush"
xxx: got a backbone and was at all guilty

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №143481
 30.07.2017
He quoted a quote in the chat: "Some people have in the morning in public transport such faces that you want to take a photo and place it in the menu of any dining room opposite the dish."
HH: And by evening they’re still crawling.

[ + 24 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №143480
 30.07.2017
A little socialized man is a cat. Not a domestic, smooth-played, but a normal wild. Holding boundaries, dragging wild across the horizon. It does not matter in quantity, but in quality of communication. It is not always nearby, but it immediately appears in the noise from nowhere. Women are like that too. You just have to look for them.

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №143479
 30.07.2017
Previously I was not very concerned with statements such as: "What a fig summer", "Before it was better!", "Rain and cold". Yes to Nafig! Normal summer, I thought. until the man in front of me did not ask the operator in the line at the refuelling station! Summer without freezing.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №143478
 30.07.2017
We live in an apartment together with my brother.

You know, two young guys... And we also work from morning to late evening, almost without weekends.

Sometimes in the evening it is enough to just wash, and prepare the patch for the next day (and then, not always).

In general, in the apartment, usually, “a little not cleaned.”

This is a long-awaited weekend. Sooner or later, it will have to be cleaned up. What makes this day worse than others?

Washed it all. No, not so though. Wash it all!

The floors, the windows, the kitchen shine like a cat... like a cat, in general.

The phone rings, Mom.

M: Are you at home?

I : Yes.

M is great! I come in 15 minutes.

I am OK!

And I think that’s what happened to me today, “the Cinderella attacked me.”

Mom comes, goes into the apartment, looks around and says:

M: Okay, you have a shit here, of course.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №143477
 30.07.2017
Asteris: The essence of Orthodoxy in Russia is to invite the father to consecrate the "Satan" rocket.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №143476
 30.07.2017
Anyone who gets injured is important to know that the moment he shoots a hooligan, his trouble doesn’t end, it just starts.
WOW: In general, you can even say more that if he is attacked, it is easier for him to shoot, because then he will suffer more, and therefore the criminal will be clearly to blame!

[ + 29 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №143475
 30.07.2017
I have a fun neighbor. Not very familiar, 25 years old.
He has a cat who loves to run up the staircase cage whenever possible. Just got out to smoke on the stairs, I see a cat running, jumping out the window, sitting and admiring freedom. After a while I hear a short kissing, later, but already louder "Brothers, I bring you food"
He flew faster than the bullets.

[ + 26 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №143474
 30.07.2017
At the same time, you will understand that you never and under no circumstances need to adjust yourself to someone in order to be good and be loved.

The golden words. I realized it only by 35, after repeated attacks on the same raids.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №143473
 30.07.2017
Luide_anna: By the way, Icelandic fairy tales are beautiful. and :)
I am not nervous to read :)
Did you know that you can drive out a ghost by shouting loudly? It’s even better to throw the ghosts!

Congregatio: M-yes... "Supernatural", filmed on the basis of Icelandic realities and legends would clearly look... specific :)

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №143472
 30.07.2017
of self-sufficiency

It was thought that self-sufficient people do not need anyone in principle, but if they choose a companion(s) of life, then they need a person who will never say to proposals about a joint business or a request for help.

Everyone can do everything for themselves, but still would like to know, that is, a person you can rely on, agree?

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №143471
 30.07.2017
For those who grieve because of the heat, the hot season has come: you will have to grind in a few days as in ordinary years for a whole summer.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №143470
 30.07.2017
Danton: A spouse recently dropped a link to an intimate store. I write to her: "What exactly interests me?" She responds to a more specific reference - a whisper, like the runners. by Nicole. "Is it going to hurt?" A response to the link. I shrugged my shoulders and ordered. No matter what the girl can have fantasies, it can not be forbidden, somehow, I shuffle lightly.
Danton: The mail arrived yesterday.
Danton: Well, what to say... It hurts, especially when it hits the eggs. And this foolish man, the saliva so flows. When I go back to my grandmother...

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