Lecha came to the bank to receive money through the "Gold Crown". He sits down to the manager and says, “Do you have the Siberian Crown?”
No, but I’t refuse now either.

Offer of innovations in the official group of VKontakte:

Introduction of Russian language, spelling and spelling exams for persons under 15 years of age. And separate tests for the use of conspicuous, questionable and crying signs. Ideally, prohibit the use of the resource to persons under the age of 13. Or with the written permission of the parents. Share the horror with other users.

On the news resource title "Sick man in cowards, who ran out on the field during the match Germany-Argentina, turned out to be a Russian".
First comment: Well, at least one of us in the final!

And there must have been a big advertisement on the door about working hours and lunch break, right?

I recently went to the tax office. So, for a break, they closed 10 minutes before the start, and began to take only 40 minutes after the end of the break. At the same time, they managed to wipe out all the gossip for a week ahead.

With all the fibers of my soul, I wish that in organizations where they are engaged in transferring papers from the office to the office, timely payment will be replaced with a separate payment for the number of served visitors. They run like cute.

A tank was found on the territory of the Timiryazev Academy. The Unknown.

In this pagan holiday of Ivan Kupala, passed through the city with a water pistol... After the phrase “be damned,” I realized that in 10-15 years a smile will be worth money.
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A beast that lays out strangers on the street deserves death.

ectd: I said that if we have one tombstone with him, I will understand that life has not been lived in vain
ectd: he thought for a long time, but then said that he had never been confessed so much in love

From Habr:
There are about 20 milligrams of radioactive potassium-40 in your body right now, and every second there are 5,000 radioactive disintegrations. Can you imagine what a gift for future generations?
If I’m not mistaken, it’s a wonderful gift. Future generations can use radiocarbon analysis to determine the age of your bones. Or have I mistaken something?

At the classes of hospital surgery, one teacher was always forced to perform cosmetic seams. And sentenced - the seam should be imperceptible, so that with the removed kidney and spleen of the recruiter in the military command were recognized fit!

And when, at last, all mankind understands this, ceases to multiply and dies out through a generation, this will be the ultimate victory of reason over animal instincts. Yes, the instincts of reproduction and survival are animal instincts.
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by Facepalm
The native, "victory of reason over animal instincts," is a state where instincts are subordinated to the requirements of reason and never take over the top mind when making strategic decisions, rather than when they are completely turned off. An analogy is the rider who then completely controls his horse when the horse fulfils all his demands unquestionably, rather than when the horse is rolled dead.

Outsider: This is a 3.14-check, comrades. Sedogyan woke up from his own goot. I dreamed that Konstantin Kinchev was chasing me, with a tail and for some reason in a women’s dress. And I think he’s Kinchita...

I did not resist:
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to this:
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There was, apparently, the story of Asimov about a man who was thrown into another dimension during the experiment. And when he was taken, he could not eat the earthly food, because all the amino acids in his body were "reflected." This is exactly what happens with artificially synthesized substances.
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Not Asimov, but Iron "Door in the Sand". And not quite dropped, and not quite into the dimension - the character passed through an alien device. He ate it, but the taste was different.
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Did you say you won $10,000 in the lottery?
Not in the lottery, but in poker. I didn’t win but I lost :)

Memories of 15 years old systems:
And again the question: who would need FAT32?
2: Massively - babies who saw new voices. Without FAT32 DOS, ppeppaasno pabotages with winchestep on 80GB - twenty puzzles of 4GB.

From the article on lente.ru

According to Astakhov, a real human rights activist should seek to end war, destroy people and save all those in need.

Q: What is the name of your punk group?
by Dogz!
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Yes to you, dogzz!! to
xxx: and The puzzles...?? to

Life of WOT
After the battle, the character knocks on the face (P):
Q: Can I go to the squad?
I: As long as I am busy, in 15 minutes I will be ready to pursue.
Q: I’m playing recently and I don’t know all the terms, who are the Goths and how are they chased?

I don’t know: “Where are black lights sold, so that the white northern nights don’t interfere with sleep?” Change the locations, change the locations, and that’s all.

Comments on the article "International Code Table of Disaster Signals ‘land-air’"

xxx: the sign "F" should be placed on the landmark (food and water are needed). Maybe when it breaks.

Yyy: Is there a sign "We need a buchlo and babies"? and :)

A photograph of director Spielberg sitting in front of a mechanical dinosaur at the shootings of the 1993 film "Jurassic Park" was uploaded to the social network Facebook fan of games J Bransomb. He added the following signature to the photo: "A shameful photo of a entertaining hunter happily posing against the background of a triceratops, whom he just ruthlessly killed. Please spread (the photo) so that the world knows the name of this disgusting man and embarrass him.
N is
Everyone was able to appreciate Bransomb’s sense of humor. Among the comments to the photo were: "I will never see your movies again, ANIMAL KILLER".
Currently, the joke message has collected more than nine thousand likes and five thousand comments, it has been shared more than 30 thousand times.

From Habr:

When I go to the cinema, I choose the longest movie. The price is the same – a long movie is more profitable %)