bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 46 - ] Comment quote №32848
 12.07.2010
XXX: How is it?
yyy: Porn star Bobbi Eden posted on her Twitter account an exciting message that if the Dutch team wins the World Cup in football – all the male persons who captured her, she will make a shot. She will be assisted by her three acquaintances, the porn stars vickyvette, misshybrid and gabbyquinteros.
YYY: I am upset...

[ + 17 - ] Comment quote №32847
 12.07.2010
The shorter the road to the future, the less the road of disappointment.

[ + 59 - ] Comment quote №32846
 12.07.2010
I recently went with my son to a familiar grandfather in Kimry for a weekend. fisherman shashlik, hamak, etc. They caught up with the gun of the Nagan of 1937, a frightener, and as he looked into the water...
In the evening of the first day, we went to sleep tired from the road and at three o’clock at night a terrible knock on the door. We look with my grandfather from the second floor, and there is a man five with knives, fittings and wire, so that with the help of his waik to remove the roof from the window...
They’re also speaking in style... – We’ll shake you a little, open, then we won’t kill you!
Grandfather cries... go, I’ll call the police... and they’ll answer... Well then we’re in the reserve of five... etc.
My hands were shaken, but I realized that only a good punch could save us... I take a scare and leave the house. They were surprised that I went out myself and didn’t have to break the barracks. I aim at everyone in turn, I say... I have a small child in the house, so I will shoot immediately and only in the bowls...
One of them answers...you think this is a village and we’re scared of the scammers?
Shoot it!
I understand that it is a dumb scare to shoot him in the head (I will immediately burn myself) and shoot him sharply under his feet. There is a loud cotton... and the horror, the sound of the bullet lying around the fence... Not yet understood how the frightener could be a combat pistol, I stumble next to the head of one of them... The shot and the sound of the bullet hit the waze... the first trembled the driver, he gave on the gases... the others rushed into the sink. I shot in the waze and hit it, it gave them speed...
While I stood looking at my magic rifle, my grandfather came out of the house and said...
Hide your gun and help me find the soldiers.
What kind of soldiers?
- the lead from my collection, which I shot out of the window from the corner... and you
What have I never understood?
Those are the wise old men... (Hello Uncle Cole)
The house was sold, thank God.

[ + 42 - ] Comment quote №32845
 12.07.2010
In Odessa, on cigarette packs is written: "Mom knows - will kill."

[ + 56 - ] Comment quote №32844
 12.07.2010
News from Rebecca:
Russian woman killed by lightning on the beach

Comments are burning:
Our "coverers" are so harsh that even storm clouds do not hinder them from warming up in the rays of the sun.
Even burning under lightning.

Getting a spotlight.

[ + 47 - ] Comment quote №32843
 12.07.2010
[20:21:20] XXX: wife support, children joy))) and everything in life will be the tip-top))) I like to find my unseen trend, to study income and life sharply went up, I wish everyone))) happiness with friends we will drink water, eat shishka and go to the sauna)) life is beautiful када you know for whom you try, personally I will have enough vigva and inita))) so there is an incentive))))
[12:17:33] XXX: yeah, I was very drunk yesterday)))) such a shit I wrote))))))

[ + 48 - ] Comment quote №32842
 12.07.2010
zetiwko: today saw the track in the performance of the Cerf group, immediately thought that the guys forgot to switch the language on the keyboard.

[ + 64 - ] Comment quote №32841
 12.07.2010
From the online game chat:
What about the bravery pills?
It is cowardly to eat.

[ + 60 - ] Comment quote №32840
 12.07.2010
From the Nokia Service Center forum (the complaint at the top, the expert’s answer at the bottom):

I don’t read the flash card.

A: It is sad

[ + 56 - ] Comment quote №32839
 12.07.2010
Borik Gorsky: So far I am discouraged by the form of dating on Facebook "proposing him friends"..... It’s just as funny when "like" all posts in a row, having nothing wrong naturally. For example, a post such as "I sit sick, I die, drugs are not all bad", and under the post "Ivan Petrov and 15 other users liked it"))))

[ + 56 - ] Comment quote №32838
 12.07.2010
Question: How many programmers are needed to ignite a fire?

xxx: One glasses programmer will easily burn a fire) You have to ask him to look at the sun and it will burn him two holes in his skull and a fire of fire)))
YYY is 5. One will write the object, the second will write the object, the third will create a driver to work with the first, the fourth will build an interface to control the process, and finally the fifth - the project coordinator - will criticize the other four and tell how everything really should work.

[ + 44 - ] Comment quote №32837
 12.07.2010
Squirrel: She approached friends, looked in the eyes and asked with a crazy face:"What were the grizzly biting?and "
Squirrel: Three girls in a row answered:"Nuts"
Squirrel: And the wolf cheered joyfully:"Bones!!and "

[ + 42 - ] Comment quote №32836
 12.07.2010
gnar [9:03 gmt+3] : your gambling in general today paid money in debt to ask for a gift to you in the maika "Debt only trUs".
kernel [9:05 gmt+3] : xD

[ + 52 - ] Comment quote №32835
 12.07.2010
She is:
This morning started with the fact that I learned that my ex-husband was in the army and my ex-lover was married.

He is:
I don’t know which of them was not lucky.

[ + 65 - ] Comment quote №32834
 12.07.2010
xxx (00:20:05 12/07/2010)
Can a shell in the ass be considered a piercing?

[ + 45 - ] Comment quote №32833
 12.07.2010
Destr: I’ll make dinner for us. What is your favorite meat?
Lavreckaya: Well, I love cats.and :)
Destr: Hey... I’m scared to ask about the garner now. = is

[ + 52 - ] Comment quote №32832
 12.07.2010
Jaguar: Let’s commit mass suicide. The main thing is to get more people

_A_d_m_i_n_: I can’t, I’m going to work soon

[ + 44 - ] Comment quote №32831
 12.07.2010
About the iPhone:
XXX: What I can’t understand, I can’t. Why buy a expensive phone, which then make a sticker so that contacts do not shorten and learn to hold it correctly. This is a collage as it does. I have a persistent feeling that people are held for fools.
YYY: So it is, they hold. The player has to play music, the camera has to photograph, the dictionary has to record, and the phone has to ring.
zzz: iPhone belongs to the class of smartphones. So you are right, except for the fact that the alarm clock must ring, and the smartphone, the fucker, owes no one anything!

[ + 51 - ] Comment quote №32830
 12.07.2010
The temptation ^_^ (09.07.2010 at 10:28:30):
The greeting. Do you want to relax? :ab:

802.11n (09.07.2010 at 22:28:48 am)
How many hours? Where is?

The temptation ^_^ (09.07.2010 at 22:31:52):
400 is

802.11n (10.07.2010 at 13:26:16)
And what does it include 400R per hour?

The temptation ^_^ (10.07.2010 at 14:05:21):
lf

The temptation ^_^ (10.07.2010 at 14:05:22):
Yes Yes

802.11n (10.07.2010 at 21:10:08 am)
What is Yes? What would you do for 400 r/hour?

The temptation ^_^ (10.07.2010 at 23:22:05):
I will

802.11n (11.07.2010 at 00:27:16):
What will you be?

The temptation ^_^ (11.07.2010 at 12:10:45):
Going out down.

[ + 50 - ] Comment quote №32829
 12.07.2010
XXX is loneliness.
Yyy: Solitude is a sucaaa!
Zzzz: I want to fuck
ZZZ: A must have a hand

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