Today I decided to serve employees in the office with an apple pastille. He gave each one a piece, but did not say what it was. One naotrez refused to try it until I told you what it was. And to explain why, I told a story from the past work. The employee’s name is Cole, further from his words.

My then boss rested in Egypt. When I arrived, I laid a hotel on my table. A bright flowery box with some oriental sweetness. All inscriptions in Arabic.

I opened and ate about a third of the pack. It wasn’t very delicious, but I made myself eat.

The next day I ask the boss: Dima, did you bring me this? Nifiga is not delicious, spicy. Consistency is incomprehensible. Heroin is a kind of sweetness, you don’t eat much.

The boss raised his eyes at me: If, are you? ? to This is a tobacco aromatized for calcium!

I didn’t eat the whole package.

A familiar driver told me. Further from his words.

“I am on the prospect. I turn at the crossroads. And suddenly, Depp runs out, with the stick of his machete, the brakes. "

D is the driver; B is the driver.

D: are we breaking?

Q: What are we breaking? Where is?

Q: Did you not see the sign?

Q: What is another sign?

D: There is a sign hanging “Floating to the left is prohibited!”

A: So what then? This sign does not prohibit the twist.

D: Do you know what it means? ! to and ride.

I felt like I was older when I picked up a free newspaper at the stop.
The turtles raised a buzz in the head:
Is there anything interesting there?
Do you have too little information flow from the internet?
A piece of paper, will it be useful? Washing the hands, laying...

The life banana.

An announcement in the newspaper: A legally subdued pensioner will take over any company on order. and expensive.

Nothing affects a girl's pride so much as not attacking a girl's honor.

XX: A colleague on the teppitopia of the dacha has a small pet. Animals, with cats in the network community for some reason associated with the goodbye, peppegopodied a dungeon - a colleague's dungeon is melting. He found the dam, removed it, and found a new one. How can he be wiser?

YY: He has to think like a bobber. Becoming a bob. To grab on them with great forces, and the bobs should have some celebration at this time (c)

I went to the shopping center today. There is a woman in a shirt with the inscription "I am a fool". I thought it was strange, even looking around. And behind the inscription "You too...")))

Speak as a woman. You have already hit, grandmothers, your "growth-weight-growth-growth-growth-doctors-goats". Go to some review book and drip your "born boy, not liked, I advise giving birth to girls".

Serehio: We have a new guy at work in Kosovo (bought at a fair).
Serehio: He is hot, he sits on the floor under the air conditioner, sits in a relaxed position, the knockout is broken, looking for something in the book.
serehio: The boss comes in, looks at him, says: "You are sitting here like this, just a shepherd on the pasture, only a knot is missing"
Serehio: That "Why does it lack" and shows his book. The Art of Programming "

This is "troll" Good that they launched, with these buds at least something funny flashes parallel to the war of food workers.

Two people were hospitalized from the Moscow Zoo last night.
They tried to make a selfie "I’m looking for a navel at Rise".

So who won that?
- With the words "And here the pedestrian causes fire on himself"he beat his pedestrian with his ferris. In our area came the hook. So no one.

I lie down with my boyfriend after work. There was a recording of a forest cat and a man. I read to the faithful: "Our ancestor saw a frozen monster whispering with angry eyes and pulled it into the cave." What he, without thinking, throws through his shoulder: "To just confuse with a woman". And, most importantly, I realized that I just slapped a few seconds later!

The reader

A society in which it is not customary to read books, but the main character, contrary to everything, reads. It is not considered adequate, etc. As a result, it turns out that there is a closed group of people who are reading, developing different things for the majority. The protagonist is accepted into this elite of society that no one knows about.

"Professions" by Isaac Asimov

There lived in Israel an ordinary, hairy, domestic boy Nathan and he had a dream - to wait for his adulthood and to make a parachute jump.

I even spent money on weekly courses.

And then came that long-awaited first adult day. The joyful Nathan arrived at the nearest air club, but the instructor carefully examined the potential student, congratulated him on his birthday and said - as he cut off:



Sorry, but we won’t take you. Weak muscles of the legs and with poor reaction. No is. The matter is not a joke, if anything, then in the best case, the whole will break, and answer us. Sorry but not.



But Nathan did not despair, turned around and went to another parachute club, but only in the second and third, as in evil, the same thing repeated, word in word.

A week later, when the guy had traveled around all the air clubs he knew, he surrendered. Almost gave up. Realizing that the independent jump does not shine for him, he decided to jump at least in tandem with the instructor, but also awaited a "brake". Nathan again began to beat the thresholds of the airclubs, but everywhere he was put on the weights, sadly turned his head, handed out his hands and said, "103 - it's a little lot. For tandem, the maximum weight is 90. “Sorry, but not again.”

The dream slowly but surely broke apart.

When Nathan left the last air club, he was suddenly caught by an instructor on the street and said:



Don’t worry, life doesn’t end here. By the way, you were near Haifa, everywhere? There are many parachute spaces.

- Of course there was, everywhere the same: either the reaction is slowed down, or the weight for the tandem is large. You think one hundred and three, my acquaintance weighs one hundred and twenty and she jumped with the instructor. What is the reaction? I’m driving, the reaction is enough. Okay and goodbye.

Do you know, you were in Beer-Sheva?

Of course was.

- Oh, and you were there... Well, okay, was – was not, since this is the case, I will help you, only promise that this conversation will remain between us. Here’s the address of one club, there you’ll pass the five-day courses quietly, and you’ll jump well alone. The club, indeed, is very small and very far in the north, but most likely your mother doesn’t know about it.

All of these "officially on the minimum" alimony workers, who abandoned children at the first difficulties, would be many times less, if after that they were really becoming the arrogance of society - like no one will hold hands, no one will give more, and all friends will send. As long as all kinds of brainless chickens regret them, and the men show solidarity, these degenerates will not translate. There are far more backward countries in terms of cultural development, where such behavior is unthinkable, and the fool is subjected to ostracism. It makes no sense to talk about the more developed, especially with this problem better, not only in terms of taboo on such actions, but also at the expense of condemned state aid. We have neither one nor the other.

As if you had no gangsters in your childhood.

by Ti. I watched Freddie Kluger and ate the Smicers.

A girlfriend was abandoned by a husband with three children. “It’s too hard.” – “I found a young girl, broke her tail, and bought her pizzas for a pizzas instead of taking care of her own children. Before that, he was transferred to the minimum of white and the rest of the type of awards. Go into the fog, fuck it as you want. My husband really escaped from this, he says, "does he not miss the children, he doesn't care how they live, if they have enough, if they are not hungry, if there is everything for school, clothes, food, toys for development, do they not cry for Daddy?" The husband said, "Meet in a dark street, I break his legs and he breaks." I will help, too. And while we help a girlfriend and her children with money and things, and we wait for a fateful meeting.

Night with a girl. The moon shines brightly in the window. The lady of my heart sits on the bed in front of me, we have romantic conversations. And here I, having decided to admire her refined silhouette, to which the moonlight gave special grace, said:

“You are so beautiful when you can’t see your face.”

I got the license, bought a car, driving for two weeks. I go on the Old Square (Moscow) turn to Moroseika. The traffic scheme has recently been changed and a separate light for public transport has been installed. In general, I went for the trolleybus and went on the red. The DPS stops immediately.



Are you breaking?

to stumble. not right.

Are there unpaid fines?

Look at the date of issue. Not yet had time.

So, am I your first hoodie?

Well yes.

- So that you don't think that all the haishniks are goats, this time we'll do a warning.



Since then, there has been only a pleasant communication with the Haishnikovs. Maybe is lucky.