E-V-S: Cheaper in Russia can only ruble.

People become especially honest when they see someone stealing more than them.

There was one man who was remarkably calm in every situation, both in the home and in the business. Situations that took anyone out of themselves, but not him. One day someone asked him why he was calm and he revealed a secret: “When I get into an anxious situation that can pull me out of myself, I remember one of the moments of my life. I remember a voice with a southern accent from a loudspeaker: “Russian landers, I propose to surrender. Everyone is guaranteed a light death.” When I recall this incident, I realize that the worst moment of my life is behind me and there’s nothing to worry about.”

Coming from the village, father and son go to the theatre on the "Leban Lake". Ballet in the middle. Son to Dad:
Why are they all on chickens?
I do not know, son. A lot of spiders. Probably the whole garden in shit.

What about Indaykin and Yachkin?
* * * * * * * * * * * *
In the presence of my dean. Students came to work. I scream a call. I recalled all and shouted the last name (and I see that one student remained unrecalled, i.e. It should be it.)
I am an egg.
and silence.
I am (a little louder) an egg!
Silence and hiccups.
I (already loudly, and about myself) - Yaichenko!! to
She (modestly so) – maybe Yashchenko?

Yes, the lists were written then (in 1995) by hand, young people do not understand...

The floor in the bank is called the bottom.

Where is Mama? :)

I do not remember. Can you ask the Microsoft Manager? I still have Win 10. Maybe they saw where I put it.

Children are different. I at the age of 6 brought the pediatrician to hysteria - I was sick, my grandmother went to the store, leaving me a clear instruction - to check what the doctor is, and let go. I didn’t come up with anything better than opening the medical book, which was at home, and meeting the doctor with the question: "Tell me about flat foot". The doctor’s response did not satisfy me. At 5 I went to the store, could check the delivery and crossed the road correctly. Yes, fucking, at 6 years old, I learned to bathe my nephew, at 8 was a full-fledged babysitter, and from three years old I could call my mother to work from a healthy heavy wall disc phone, for which I needed to pull a chair and draw the numbers on a sheet of paper.

The peasants cry.
Shogun ordered to burn
The overseas meat.

The hot water has been removed since August 11. I went to wash yesterday. Heated half a pot of water. And here I am standing in the shower, diluting the boiling water in the pot with water from the soul leake. I squeeze my finger into the pot to check, and the water is still hot. I pour out part of the pot and start diluting again. I try it and it’s hot again. For the third time I came to know that it would be good to try the water from the leake (well, purely for the prick). I tried. It was hot water :)))

...
“You don’t even know what a shit he is, he even drinks vodka.
Yin and Yang?
- No, he drinks a drink and follows after a minute, then after two, next after four, and so on.
(Two days later)
... By the way, the norms of the system, such a benevolent state did not exceed me from the waterfall, so another vodka is a bit more.

by stannum99:

A young woman with constant back pain about 3 years old. He was treated by dozens of neurologists without any effect. I first appeared in April. All the imaginable examination was already done, looked at - fibromyalgia. Designate a standard course.

Then it started out foolish. It appears in May - everything is still the same, drugs did not drink because they are harmful. I recommend starting treatment. A month later - all the same, I did not take medication - again, I was strongly advised to start treatment and not shake my head. It appeared in July, it hurts, it has not been treated. I was a psychopath, purely maternally explained all the misconduct of her behavior and promised to start knocking the pills with a hammer into all the natural and unnatural holes. She ran away crying and began to take drugs. Within a couple of weeks the pain stopped. At first she was happy. And then she wrote to me a complaint that at the first visits I was not convincing enough...

Mom asks- "how do you and your husband usually communicate that they have been together for 10 years and are all as happy?". I remembered yesterday.
I put my dishes in my ears. (M) has already gone from work, writes SMS:
Buying a house?
I am black bread.
M of Chernobyl? The Black? The Black?
Chernobyl Ept
Don’t wait until Monday. As long as I find the snorkel, as long as I make the pass, until I get there. At least a day is needed to hunt for bread, it is very hidden at this time of year. Plus, it is necessary to invent an elephant against elephants and monkeys, or, according to the summons, a crush with holy water no longer takes them.
Take care of the juice.

God sent the crown a piece of cheese.
Buried with cheese.

We walked around the Great Novgorod and reached the monument "Millennium of Russia". The daughter wondered: why is there no Ivan the Terrible on the monument? I explain: Novgorodans don’t like him, because he once arranged one of his favorite bloody tubs here. For the sake of justice, I add, “He was no more cruel than many rulers of that era, just very evasive.” The child thoughtfully said, “Well, it’s such a Lady Gaga from the Russian monarchy.”

St. Petersburg metro scheme, where the names of stations are written in Latin:
The foreigner swings his jaw when he pronounces Sennaya Ploschad.
zzz: And a foreigner in Prague won’t pull his jaw out by pronouncing Rajská zahrada, for example? Or Baishiqiao South in Beijing?
WOW: Just tried, asked a foreigner to read. The foreigner did not whisper anything, only read "the area" with the emphasis on "a".
In my student years there was such a trick that a student from Africa twisted his jaw when he was given the task to say the phrase: “I am studying at the Kharkov Polytechnic Institute.”
We have tested. It turned out as follows: "I heard of the Harkov Palitecnic Institute". The word "charkovsky" is the most difficult.
You have the wrong foreigner! It destroys all the legends :)
zzz: judging by the accent - Armenian =)

Pray that he may come.
YYY: I have to put it on, it’s your phone.)
The more people pray, the better.
Which Gods to Pray?
XXX: It doesn’t matter, God is one, only the interfaces are different. This is a global cloud service.
Don't forget to insert my ID in prayer and everything.
You are not afraid, you are afraid.)
xxx: I think everything is clear there, the project is not a thousand years old, they are not afraid of ddos )
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
YYY: The USSR firewall did not allow the cloud service
XXX: Well or so, someone has managed to get around.
XXX: Neo of the Soviet disaster
How will you pray, if you are not there?
XXX: Ask the Father
yyy: so there must be authorization through social networks)
YYY: well or guest entrance
xxx: bu ha ha)

According to Matthew Perry, star of the series Friends, in the most difficult times for him he drank almost a liter of vodka daily and took up to 30 pills.
He has a liver B.
He always smelled Cortney.

The Picaboo.
Take the order. During three years of possession, the service was a couple of hours.
Went to visit her?

Correspondence of two flirtants on the Internet:
She: I will give you borsches and cook children.
I will grow a tree and build a son.
Growing a tree then
He is: No. Do not argue, woman.
As you say, my beloved
He is: * kissing"
The perfect relationship!
He: I want to align my hair on my legs. Suddenly yes! 😉
She: Okay, I will grow...