Do not take on more than what has already been placed on you.

To the story of 1 September 2011 about a soldier who called home by special communication...
The desire to call home and hear the native voice is inherent in everyone who has taken urgent service. But at the end of the 70s there were no cell phones...The only available opportunity is to go to the city and go to the negotiating point (most of the audience, probably, does not even understand at present what a negotiating point is). There were problems with dismissal.
To get out to the inter-city by the apparatus, which stood in the companies on the switch, it was possible only through the switch, knowing the official passwords, which the soldiers should not know...But in our part, specializing in communications, the problem was solved. In the first, with the help of a "pilot" - a pseudotelephone from a pipe and attached to an isolated number collector, and spots from sewing needles were touched all the telephone wires going to the cross (distribution cabinet). The needles carefully pierced the isolation (no trace remains) and listened to the line, looking for the city.
Finally, having found one, precisely by the same wire as all the lines, they connected to the city and conducted it to the town hall, to the same apparatus.
This ancient apparatus made of black plastic, remembered, probably, the war... There was no numbering disk on it. There was also a problem - the phone had to be connected to the internal switch - the operator had a signal when raising the pipe, it was impossible to parallel the city and the inner line, it was possible to immediately burn up... It was very original - if the device stood in the middle of the box - it was connected to the inner line, but if the device moved to the edge, the magnetic glued to it from the bottom switched it with the help of hercons (these are such magnetically controlled contacts) to the city line.
They called only at night, when the deputy police departed from the headquarters (this was his city number) and all the officers. The absence of the disc was not embarrassing - what it was for the radio telegraphs, with a hand-key knocking the point-tire. If you quickly press the lever of the phone once when the phone is raised, it will correspond to a set of units, two pairs, and so on...Thanks to God, at that time most cities could be typed by code.
Why such clever tricks? Just that telephone apparatus stood just across the door from the guard in part. There was no curse during my service. And the details of the bills for the intercity also did not exist at the time... and maybe the device still works?

A wife comes to her husband for a date in prison. The husband asks dissatisfied:
Why did you not come to me so long ago?
“I went to the head of the prison and asked him to punish you for at least a year, because you were given 25 years.
Well and what?
Every time he gave me unfair suggestions.
And you what?
Come together, go home!

Loss (the ratio of insurance payments to insurance fees) according to CASCO in most insurance companies is more than 100%, i.e. This type of insurance companies lead to a loss in order to maintain the size of the customer base, and compensate for this loss at the expense of other types of insurance.

The fucking hungry.

A single click on the left turner means that you can overtake. Furos usually show this because they see the road situation much better from above.

Never blink the left turn for that!
Signal "Beyond permitted" is the right turner.
The left swing is "Do not overtake!"
How you are alive so far.

I dreamed of that on Saturday ;)
Dreaming in the style of a horror movie) I mean walking around some house, and something angered the local evil forces. Then again and again, as a result of the last drops for them, I began to forge my hair out of the drainage grid of the bath. Here on the bottom of the bath begins to appear an inscription in the form of cracks on the enamel, and after 5-10 seconds I read:
"You have already been fucked!". I realized that I'm fucked, and it's time to get rid of here)))

Aunt of her husband survived the war and hunger, still a girl, but the oldest of the children. My mom didn’t remember anything, and my aunt told me:
“We stayed alone – my father was on the front, my mom worked for weeks, came from time to time, all alone. Neighbors are feeding. Sometimes, the house is completely empty and there is nowhere to take, we gather hemp with the children, roast, eat, and here a bomb. Go under the bed, it’s funny.

The xxx:
I’m very happy to see you "sweet". The computer broke out, apparently the whole router crashed. I tell them to call them an electrician, and they say to me, "So it's a computer socket, what the electrician understands in it, if the bulb was connected to that socket, he would understand."
YYYY :
and ROFL
in the computer connector computer electricity )))

My wife and I watch horror. The picture is as follows: the main character runs into the cafe and runs "Flee all, here next to the monster, it will eat you all" and escape. In the cafe movement zero... everything is in place as before. No one even thinks of escaping.
I: What a fucking thing, what are they sitting there... said the monster... will eat. What is Pofig? What a marathon.
Wife: Let’s calm down, it’s in any way our Russians drink beer. Drink and go slowly.

I go from work. In the courtyard, the boys, aged 10 years, play some kind of war with swords, shields, etc.
Suddenly, one goes back and screams:
– Oh! I have a pharmacy!
He gets a blister from some pills (empty) out of his pocket and pretends to eat a pill out of it.
Then a loud scream (so that everyone can hear it):
It is all! I have a full life! I have a pharmacy! I am immortal!

Beast: Bought an apartment, from the old owner on the toilet container left a sticker "Better a small dollar than a big thank you". Why she hangs there, I don’t know. But my friends, the trolls of the rocks, told me to throw a little there after every visit. How to disappear? → ) - :

The employee, leaving in a decree, drew some rodents to us in the office, saying that she would not have them at home now. They ordered me to feed them.
I had the habit of feeding them once a month with dried fruits out of hand, in addition to the usual food, so that they do not grieve without vitamins. And so as not to be confused, I gave them vitamins on the salary day at the office.
After a couple of months, the rodents melted something and began to touch some of the fruits. Three months later, on the day of wage, they began to feed in their throats until they were given fruit.
And today, because of their common stocks, the animals have overrun, and now they each have their own conquered bunch of dried fruits at different corners of the cage.

I work as an installor. Connected the subscriber, I call to the office to find an iPad. The channel is taken by a new admin. The further dialogue:
Give iPhones to Lenin 33/8
This is... This is... 88.2
I hear the scream of the senior admin:
by Mimo! This is a library!
That would be 88.3!
by Mimo! This is an apartment!
by 88.4!
It fell, good guy!

Conversation between Peterz (P) and Moskovich (M):

Q: It’s only you in Maaskev who are all trading in the subway. We have intelligent people, offices under this matter...
In the metro?

I wonder if you can die of laughter.
One day, I got stuck while bathing.
He swallowed water and went under water.
CHC: While he was dying, I realized that he was almost dying of laughter, and he stunned.

The Director is Coming
He turns and looks at me, I say a thousand and shoot him with my finger.
He says aa. a. a. and pretends to fall
You are fucking fucking.

by Poltech. The first couple. Theory of materials processing.
The Prep:
- In the process of cutting participate: machine, workpiece and cutting tool.
From the back:
and tokar. You have forgotten, Professor!

You are okay.
Childhood language in winter
Didn’t you touch anything?:DD
Tag: touched
But not in childhood.

With Habra:
The Dirtyest Jobs in Google
I can’t even imagine what an invitation to such a job should look like.
“Hi, we’ve heard that you’re a frozen guy with sick moral values!
–...
We need such people!

The child does not sleep alone.
Mom: I wonder, do you have a button "off"?
R: not
M: Unfortunately, I should have added this option.
Q: But I have a touch indicator "mama". When my mother touches me, I sleep, and when she touches me, I don’t sleep.