I got a compliment today.
Riding a taxi, the taxi driver says to me, “You’re the first girl for today to come out almost on time.”
I answer: "You don’t know the whole story yet. After the signal that the taxi had arrived, I had time to change clothes.
Taxi Driver: "Did you accidentally serve in the army? andquot;
I: "No, but I have two children"
Taxi Driver: " Yes, this explains everything "

Sergey Ivanovich is a very naïve but intelligent cat. He regularly climbs to the table, knowing that he will scratch the water in the sharp gray face of the sprayer, so he runs through it to the window at an accelerated pace so that it doesn’t fall. Here is the package on the table. How not to smell. The demonstration begins from the spray. And then Sergey Ivanich includes MEGAMOG and escapes from the mini-brandspot in this same package with the head, tail and other causals. But the package is not a capsule - and dry and left on the table - profit!

With this character, someday someone will beat you! ... maybe even me... or those I will pay for"
If you forget the notebook again, I will buy it for you. This is a beautiful... with Beer..."
You talk so much that I can’t understand whom you are reminding me of the bulbs—papagating my neighbors or those from House 2.
Why doesn’t Ivanka write anything? "Well, because he is stupid here!"
You didn’t read Fathers and Children because it wasn’t in the library? Vasya, you should talk to your parents about this, but I will have to. What do you know about torrents?"
Hello to you from 10A! ?

A good leader is like a fur in your ass: it doesn’t let you sit quietly.

here here :

I’m all waiting for London to declare the Scottish referendum illegitimate and start bombing Edinburgh.

As soon as there will appear the people's self-defense of Edinburgh in the form of the Russian Federation.

We were in Budapest and lived in the City Apartments. The Wi-Fi points at the neighbors were called Fucking City Apartments, City Apartments Sucks, Fucking Tourists From City Apartments, City Apartments Go Home. Lovely people...

xxx: From the company "VTB-Insurance" came a letter "Give gifts for the best adventures". What are they about?
yyy: Casting for the most exciting insurance case

I am a great 5B manager. After the lessons, they went with them to clean the area. There was almost no garbage, so the children began to get angry. One boy ran with a package against the wind and spoke: "MUSOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!". I caught myself in the thought that I also want to run and scream: "MUSOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOR!!!and "
26 years old, teacher, I don’t feel like an adult at all :D

The harmless man. Noisy, often under the beer, a lover then in a fight to use, then in a monkey to be

— — — —

Ahha, we know such: "I just asked to smoke", "The car just took a ride"...
It’s disgusting to read!

From Szhaman:

In this place, I always remember the fairy comments in the Lithuanian news portal. Then they discussed a small change in the gun law. And it was written in such a way that, if desired, it was possible to understand what they were deciding - whether to allow the sale of guns in Lithuania at all.

I sat and just stumbled. Unfortunately I could not keep the comments. All internet theorists were hysterical - but how can we allow weapons in Lithuania? We have corrupt mentions, people are wild, drunkenness and crime. Absolutely not! Lithuania is not America - there are traditions - and here is wildness.

Everything is like a copycake with arguments in Russia. Humor is that wearing and possessing guns was allowed at the time for more than 10 years.

(Man is an administrator at the bar)
Kirill
Yesterday there was a fight again.
I’m waiting for my pizza to come ?
Given who I am working with, it will happen soon)))
Nikolay
There are quiet people like
Kirill
That is yes))
Although yesterday one person got between the case for the question "what’s happening"
Nikolay
I did not get it)
He was answered clearly.)

I have a dating site with a Polish woman. It almost reached the point.
XX: I squeeze my chest with one hand, and the other squeezes my cheek.
I: How do you print?

Title: The Pizza
Original title: Pizza
Year of Release: 2014
Genre: horror, thriller, mystic
Country : India
Produced by: UTV Motion Pictures

by djtaren:
Are there dances? If there were, I would have stumbled, never seen horrors with dances.

I’m a fucking joke, I admit.
I went into food, the mood was awkward.
I see the value "kill in that. Sweetened "
I tell the saleswoman - and exactly in this sauce?
She raised her eyes and was tired:
That is the same, young man, that is the same...

An anecdote on the subject:
It was brought to the shops during the times of the Brežnev shortage of canned food "Coffee whale in tomato sauce". Kilometre lines, all in a moment. A happy man comes home with a conserve, opens, and there is only a tomato sauce and nothing more. He goes back to the store and goes to the seller. Yes, tired of getting rid of the complaints: "Well, you probably also got a hole".
Good and delicious food for everyone.)

Why is it so difficult to communicate with programmers?
YYY: They learn several machine languages, eventually forgetting the human language.

XXX: Again aunt some got up in the passage :/ Neither to circumvent nor to pull out.
YYY: I call them Celestials.
XXX: O_o
yyy: Because "princesses" and cobbles at the same time :3

And I'm wondering, muezzin so passes in one copy, or a few of them, and they have watches? Or maybe they are, for example, two, and they make noise two by two?

99% of the minarets have long been installed, and this scale in the recording is broadcast. Really beating the throat for faith is now accepted on the Internet.

xxx: In the documents to my clock it is stated that they have an error of 3 seconds per year
My clock is not...
XXX is wrong?
YYY: the documents

We talk about girls.
In general, I added her to my friends. Truth is, I do not know what to do next.

I remember, at our wedding very loudly, during the kissing, oral a drunk testi, the words "debil" "compassion" "nakera" well and in this kind. And why 15 years ago I was so dumb that I couldn’t understand such hints.