bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №69929
 12.09.2012
My mother is an alien or a saint. I was a witness to a miracle!! to
and???? to
“She found my cluttered headphones on my desk, wrapped them and put them in my bag. And when I came to the institute they didn’t get confused again!!! They were lying well!! I am in shock!! I don’t know how to live with it now!
I’ve always dreamed of telling you that no one will believe you ?

[ + 28 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №69928
 12.09.2012
Call the rescue service in the area
Tagged with: alo
In Greece, pigs are poorly born. It is not in hand. We drank her beer to calm her down. What to do next?
XHH:Guddy

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №69927
 12.09.2012
We had a secretary (simpapulechka and at the same time a sports master in karate) put the theme of a common mail of some pink mice. No one likes it, but no one disputes it.)

[ + 42 - ] Comment quote №69926
 12.09.2012
I recently went to a psychiatrist and said:
I play dance, like dependency.
One of the psychologists:
What is your efficiency?

[ + 29 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №69925
 12.09.2012
Bremaver: I remembered a banal way to confuse a person. Ask "you down?" and point your finger up.

[ + 35 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №69924
 12.09.2012
Funny advertisement went - The dentist says: "I am often treated with tooth pain..." AND WHAT should I treat him? With hemorrhoids?

[ + 53 - ] Comment quote №69923
 12.09.2012
You need to allocate 18+ to the advertisement, at least during the day it will not be shown.

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №69922
 12.09.2012
Our players have become champions of the Paralympic Games.
The main collection?

[ + 44 - ] Comment quote №69921
 12.09.2012
Only in Russia to the doctor, taking from 4 o'clock, you can sit in the line for 2 hours, and you have a TALLON for 4!

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №69920
 12.09.2012
I work in the security department. The customer comes to connect the apartment to the security controller. Fill out documents and in the object card (the characteristics of the apartment) writes, literally:
- Two-room apartment in the first entrance on the first floor of the nine-storey panel house, windows of the kitchen and lodge out on the back of the house, the bedroom window on the entrance (facade). Animals in the apartment: a dumb cat. In the event of a cat alarm or cat attack on the police officer, shoot the cat to the defeat (you will shoot, do not damage the linoleum, the apartment can be rented)

I can’t stand up to see the cat’s hand.

[ + 53 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №69919
 12.09.2012
256 days a year. Congratulations to all involved!

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №69918
 12.09.2012
The suv:

In St. Petersburg, a pensioner stole six million rubles and Faberge eggs

Give me your eggs back!!!! to

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №69917
 12.09.2012
I sit in the cabbage... The playlist is just to inspire... Here you and scurvy, and Bilan, and Alsu, and metal with Kenny J... Gesto... Poor my brain...

Upd: Oh, Ramstein went... I’m waiting for Mozart and Sepulture...

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №69916
 12.09.2012
Dear iPhone 4S owners! We remind you that tomorrow morning the spells of your wickedness will disappear and you will become poor again. =) is

[ + 48 - ] Comment quote №69915
 12.09.2012
See photos from the car show. One of the companies presented a concept car with completely transparent doors.
Commentary of husband:
And not to scratch...

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №69914
 12.09.2012
From the ASK:
...
Wgr: When we were sitting in the apartment, after the celebration, did he know that he was wet?

wgr: Girls from the universe asked him to sing a song under the guitar that reminds him of them and is associated with them.

Wgr: When I heard the familiar introduction, I was alert. And when the words went: "Children's Shallows on the Tossy Shallows" I couldn't stand and just scratched my legs with laughter C:

[ + 48 - ] Comment quote №69913
 12.09.2012
On Sunday evening in the shopping district on cameras saw some emo that painted the walls.
Well, they quickly gathered all the guards, ran after them for a long time, eventually pressed them in some corner, brought them to themselves.
XXX: Locked in some office, caused penties
xxx: I forgot to say, while running, one of these fools fell and put on the concrete well, well, and someone from the guard said too loudly that well, say that under the camera it happened, there will be no need to prove that we did not beat them.
xxx: A minute after 20 mint profits, the cabinet opens, from there the bodies fall out, all in blood, one's nose is broken, the rings swell right in front of the eyes
xxx: Everyone is in shock, and those to myths, say uncles, save us, we are beaten here, punish them, we are not at all and so on
xxx: So now in the local security there is a cool recording, in HD, with the original sound, as three dude beats each other in a hurry :)

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №69912
 12.09.2012
From Chat WoT:
XX: Ride like a flock
YYY: So is it!
Zzzz: That is true!
Uuu: So is it!
Kkk: That is for sure.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №69911
 12.09.2012
The news:
1st Russia is in favor of holding an international conference on Syria, said Bogdanov.
2nd The US does not consider it possible to hold an international conference on Syria in the context of ongoing violence in the country
nailgun: Russians - Let's hold a conference to stop the war!"

Americans – "It won’t work, there’s a war going on!"

It is :)


[ + 41 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №69910
 12.09.2012
Monster: Just as a samurai goes to battle alone, knowing that he will not return home, so I am tired of going to work, knowing that the boss will answer my puzzles.

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna