Yesterday I was offended by a girl, so I saw that the pizza delivery service on my phone was recorded as Pizzulechka, and she was just Lena. He says you treat pizza more gently than me. I had to come up with the idea that it was I who called her such a joke.

No, well not to explain to her that my relationship with this pizza lasts 7 times longer than with her)

By the way, the pizza was always brought on time, and the girl never came anywhere on time. Such things.

Once, telling my daughter a fairy tale about the cowboy, I thought about the fact that the story of the wandering bakery character is somehow too short and ends on the fourth representative of the local fauna. Of course, as a means of strengthening family arrangement and preventing dromania, the fairy tale works. But only if we assume that the main character will be naive, inexperienced and with an intelligence ratio in the area of sixty. The saga about the cautious paranoid Claw would probably shame Donzov.

#WhyMorocco

<<my mom sent a hammer to another country on the coast of the Mediterranean... >>

The oysters on the usual knock do not open, but closed firmly from the inside.

Grandma always stocked all sorts of items for her funeral... well there are decent clothes, shoes, clothes for the grave. The Red. From this red cloth I had a vampire coat, and my grandmother’s inserted jaw in my mouth looked fantastic.
Did your grandmother be buried again?

Let’s go faster to come faster to not go!

At seven in the morning you can only want to kill) and sleep.

The second desire is stronger.

Wow, you’re such a passive killer, in your head – you’d kill everyone, but you’re sitting on your bed, looking at one point and trying to figure out where the butt is.

Nevertheless, the love of the Russian people for a tail is something genetic, inferior only to the habit of the maternal design of absolutely any thought, whether it is something concrete, like a cat under the foot in the sweat, or abstract, like the theory of relativity in its own presentation. Our man with a tail can do everything: from cleaning the territory and building masterpieces of wooden architecture to defending his own civil position. Do you have a tail in your farm? No is. Do you live in Russia?

The most funny thing about the current KVN is that it is virtually the only social elevator that exists today.

From the Auto Forum:
The question:
I have a mystic. Last winter it was 20. I drove a car with an enclosed oven. A sharp thrust. He killed two mice. They pulled them out, the threshold stopped. As before, the oven stopped working. In the autumn, my thermostat was repaired by the master worked as before. Now winter has come and the stove does not work and the consumption from 8l.100 km became 12.
Per anyone has had something like this please tell me.

Answer to:
Most likely, the mice helped turn the fan on the oven, and you killed them.

When the wheel on the fur changed, the long-distance driver realized that he had found his destiny.

What is a Philosophical Stone?
YYY: He turns any metal into gold and gives personal life.
YYY: Oh, that is eternal...

"For the completion of «Zenit-Arena» allocated another 2 billion rubles"

As the saying goes, to have, so the Queen, to steal, so a million. So what kind of person are they going to fuck?? to

Listen, let us get acquainted.
and no.
And what?
You are in sports trousers.
Well, I will buy you too.

How do you call your cat?
- In a different way, from the latter: "chickens".
The Giroud? OOO
It’s like a whirlwind, but not.

News from E1:
xxxh: employees of the GIBDD organized alternate heating of passengers in a patrol car.
Who and how did he heat it?
zzz: the cute girls were warm on the warm knees of the haishnyh, and the old ugly women were warm by pumping the wheels of the patrol car with a hand pump.

From discussion on the forum situation that parents registered a child with the name "Lucifer".

What is this? In Rome during the late empire (dominate) the name Lucifer was used as a male personal name (praenomen). There was, in particular, St. Lucifer, a church figure of the 4th century AD. Bishop of Kalyari (Sardinia), an opponent of the Arians. In addition, Lucifer is one of the ancient Roman names of the planet Venus, mentioned in the Eneida.

Well, following this logic, the name "Juda" is also quite normal...

You will be surprised...

In the end, they choose and buy cheap shit. And those who buy expensive goods never ask questions about its origin and quality.
YYY: You almost revealed the trick of sellers who sell expensive shit.

Default bank with green logo
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
As of January 1, 2014, banks are legally obliged to return money to their customers if the customer proves that the money was stolen from the card.
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
The bank offers for a certain amount (approximately one and a half thousand) to insure the card against theft of money. If the customer proves that the money has been stolen and not taken out by himself, the bank... does what it is already obligated by law.

“Since I got married, I started to feel like my wife was a cat.
YYY: What is it?
I wake up in the morning with my hair in my mouth; I sit down for dinner with my hair in my food; I go to the bathroom with my hair everywhere.

The Moscow Metro. I stand on the platform, I observe the picture: a train approaches, a couple sits in the wagon, a man (M) stands up and goes to the exit of the wagon. The woman, stuck in the phone, did not notice that the satellite has gone out, continues to sit. A man goes out on the platform, walks a few meters, turns around and sees that the woman has not come out, he runs back to the door of the car in panic:
Natasha, Natasha is Natasha!
The woman raises her eyes from the phone, breaks up and runs to the exit. The door closes, a man and a woman meet through the closed door of the car.
You are going to go, Natasha.
The train goes into the tunnel, a man goes out of the station. The curtain.