Today I had to go to work, at 9 a.m. the phone is ringing, the boss is ringing! I think it's time to go out, and no))) he says so tired voice, and let's not go to work today!? to

A real advertisement. I sell the ears cheaply.

Nokia Lumia 520 stopped a bullet and rescued a Brazilian police officer

You are talking about the Nokia 3310.
Freakie: 3310 would shoot in response and detain the offenders

As an option to:
Unfortunately, in our case, the opposite words are "... no blackjack and no prostitute", then you beat.

— — —
A clear pepper. What else is blackjack and, more importantly, the prostitutes in the blackjack? "With a lotto and a song and dance ensemble"!
and----
With the "crocodile" and the chopsticks :).

Who can make a copy of a plastic card?
yyy: In the nearest ROVD clarify, they should have contacts of masters

From the Women’s Forum:
"I don’t have time, I need a Time Mockup".
Some mushrooms madam has already eaten, I don't know only, mushrooms or pineapples...

The main problem with the runnet is that everyone believes the quotes written. by V.I. Lenin
yyy: Post, under Lenin there was not yet a concept of "runet"
xxx: *facepalm.jpg*

Wife bought shampoo, read: shampoo is not effective for genetic causes of hair loss and diseases.
What are the other causes of hair loss?
She: Well... eyes...

Especially evil people remember even possible offenses.

A small courtyard in the center of the city. Two houses built at a corner each. At the building 1 entrance to the street, at the building 2 entrance to the yard, the door in the inner corner. Part 1 office. Paid parking carried the plankton into the courtyards, where you can never turn. And one metrosexual put his car with his ass at the door of the second house. One man sharply opened the door and broke his lamp. So the man was sentenced to pay for repairs for corruption of someone else’s property. And it is unclear that the guy parks the car according to his orientation, that the door is iron and cannot be seen through it. So I found out that the camera in the office was working.
Pidaras was completely squeezed and walked gool, sending tenants to the her.
In short, a video recording:
The door opens. The naked hand is raised with a tail on a long tail.
I smashed the lamp.
Cut the bumper (and what is the iron on the DEU? Foley )
To say goodbye, he pulled his shoe into the suitcase.
The hand with the tail is stretched, the door is closed.
I never found a naked hand.
Entrance to the entrance is free.

A friend from Russia called, said he took a bottle of vodka, a piece of salt and went to catch me! I said that without a fight I would not give up and bought two more bottles of vodka and a couple of kilos of ice cream... let the electricity run out! And my ginseng also has a spoonful of walnuts [...]))

The Sony Xperia

Benefits of: New

Disadvantages: drowned

The commentary:

Used a week, decided to check on for the sealability (it was for this option on him and went). I went down for half a minute in the aquarium, took two photos - this is all the pleasure for 25,000 rubles. The screen floated (started flowing from the side of the dynamic). He was taken to the store and sent for examination. In a month’s time the answer is incorrect exploitation! 😉 Going to court, the trial is ongoing.

My wife is so clever that I am a fool.

MadBrozzeR: Wait a little, I’ve already written the code, I’ve done it.
MadBrozzeR: It remains only to find out why the niqab doesn’t work...

From the discussion in the serial publication:
I want to be a reverse :)
And I’m a man who can watch TV shows all day, eat and not get fat.
333: 222, be realistic, a vampire and the simpler.

Among bus conductors, the title "Master" is awarded to those specialists who can unmistakably determine exactly who of the 40 Chinese who entered the salon has already paid for the trip and who is not yet.

Dima_K: There is such a pattern - if Metallica has a song that lasts less than 6 minutes - it was recorded a clip.

I am a deer, I don’t talk to animals.

The Hunter: You are a deer

It would be good to have a pot with a "smart" cover: when the soup starts to roast, the internet is cut off immediately!

For a long time I could not understand what annoyed me in the news on Tivi. It is today! The Civilization. The Russians invaded the territory of Ukraine. The American government is dissatisfied. The culmination was today’s news. The Russians have grown patriotism, you can build a campsite in one day. )))