bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №80905
 30.04.2013
If I were with you in the paintball, I would show you all.
XXX: I would show you all!
xxx: I would show you my shining heels
xxx: but running away, I would pull my shoulder, as in dancing taught) it is important)

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №80904
 30.04.2013
xxx: They say that on the computer science EGE in part C you can use any programming language, the main thing is to specify the name and version of the language.
I encourage my friends to teach brainfuck.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №80903
 30.04.2013
Who has a Skype Zzz?
XXX: Add it to the chat.
Yyy: he sits over the table from you, ask him.
XXX: The Man
XXX: 21st Century in the Garden
I will send him an email.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №80902
 30.04.2013
A little girl comes from school and says:
Anna goes to the islands for the holidays.
In which? The Maldives and the Canaries?
I don’t remember the name of Anchorage.
and??? to
I remembered Sardinia.

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №80901
 30.04.2013
Matrix - Release
I sincerely believe that there should be a portal from the Pushkin metro station in Moscow to the Pushkin metro station in St. Petersburg.

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №80900
 30.04.2013
Good name for the cat.

Code on Musske - Trachl
When there is no food in the bowl, it’s gone.
When to embrace.
When he is angry, he bites.
When it is pleasant - Murlykel
When in the pot
When I was sad I cried
When active, jump
The Club - Play
When he sleeps, he is tired.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №80899
 30.04.2013
P is a boy, D is a girl.

Q: You are so sensitive! I like it so much in you!
D: Let’s go now. by Fuck.
P: falling out of depression

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №80898
 30.04.2013
Why are you green?
Do you know that the factory near the factory opened? I bought the mantle ready. I wanted to eat in the morning and I was alone in the cold. I feel awkward, the circle got up. Maybe because it wasn’t warm.
It’s hot for lunch, and you know what to say? Not warmer is better!
hhhhhh :D

[ + 38 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №80897
 30.04.2013
I now read in one publication in the UK from a girl (a virgin) twenty years old - "Lunch did not give". For a long time, I thought about who she wasn’t giving lunch and why should it be mentioned in the topic of sex?
Then came. People, illiteracy will destroy you someday

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №80896
 30.04.2013
I ask my wife:
What are you doing?
I watch the series.
is interesting?
The Russian

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №80895
 30.04.2013
This ship the rats leave first, but the cabinets are the last.

[ + 76 - ] Comment quote №80894
 30.04.2013
I think the whole tragedy of the situation will be able to appreciate only the girls who have long waited for the "prince".
My friend told me about her first realization of the severity of our female part. This happened in the early 1990s, when the first foreign beauty Barbie dolls were brought to us. Like almost all the girls, Annette also had her own Barbie. She lived in her three-room box of shoes, and chased teas with plush bears and rabbits, and with a rubber crocodile. And the heart of the girl was thirsty for a beautiful love story, wedding and family comfort. But there was no couple for Barbie, suitable for the genus characteristics - not with a rubber crocodile to coexist!
And Anetka lived with her parents in the village, and there with human bridesmaids was a tension, not that with dolls. And Father Aneschkin often and for a long time travelled on a business trip and brought gifts to the children, here the girl and asked, "Bring, Daddy, Ken, for my Barbie." Father promised that Ken would bring him.
Long awaited Annie and her Barbie. By the arrival of the bridegroom everything was thought out: the scene of dating, the love intrigue, the underwear (with a fate), the wedding script was made and guests (bears, rabbits and even a rubber crocodile) were invited.
Dad fulfilled his promise and brought Ken. Completed with another Barbie and two puppies.

[ + 69 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №80893
 30.04.2013
In a small music store, a decently dressed man asks the seller:
Young man, where are your chances?
Seller (long hair, eyebrows in the ear):
We only have Charles Aznavour.
The buyer blinked for a few seconds, blinking his eyes.
The Seller:
And the bastard is there...

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №80892
 30.04.2013
Appendix to Monopoly
xxx: Vote by round -700k
ууу: "Poddalovo" - is anal sex, learn Russian!!! to

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №80891
 30.04.2013
XX: Thee
Was it sarcasm?
I stopped drinking.
Have you stopped drinking? Well well well.
Q: I am graduating soon.
I must remain a virgin.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №80890
 30.04.2013
I am studying programming. Sitting on a pair in English, we understand the comparison too, too much, too many. We come to too much, listing the kinds of innumerable substantials.
The same group says "people". Prepod in answer "No, people are wrong". Not everyone understood why I broke the pattern.

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №80889
 30.04.2013
Comments on a photo of six NASA scientists writing on a board:

XHH: NASA economical, one board for 6 people

UUU: I saw a German porn show where one board was for 8 people, the Germans were more economical.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №80888
 30.04.2013
Clients decided on the last day of work to arrange my head.
It is a classic)
They went in the ass.
This is a classic :) :D

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №80887
 30.04.2013
The apotheosis of my shortness was to rebuild the route in the subway to catch 3G everywhere

[ + 56 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №80886
 30.04.2013
From Habr:
The NES (Dendy) cartridges also had protections that made the complexity of the game untouchable if the game discovered that it was hacked and launched on a non-original NES. And since there was no original NES in the Soviet space at all, games like "Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2" we passed, not even knowing that the developers considered them unpassable.

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