When you throw dirt into a person, remember: it may not fly before him, but it will remain in your hands forever!

I have a daughter of Dr. R. I wish you a long and good job.

And one of them, demonstrating his new iPhone, accidentally snatches it out of his hands, and trying to get his foot in flight, caaaak heraned him a pinch...the phone in the clothes, taking into account that from the blow he flew into the ceiling xD

X: Have you ever married?
Yes, it has been a long time :)
Is it all for love? 😉
By stupidity...

xxx: I just answered a friend without a clamp after the phrase, she asks why I’m so angry)

XXX: I'll tell you a short story
xxx: which begins with the phrase with which a third of my stories starts
XXX: I was hard yesterday

We go with a companion on the street, strike our eyes at the poster "Quantum epilation", we fall into a stupor for an indefinite time. A friend wakes up and says, “Yes, I’ve already heard about this, very progressive telology from the creators of the liquid vacuum under pressure, ah...

We had a cat, the old one was already there. Always loved to catch mice, but in old age it became strange. He caught mice in the garden, dragged them into the house and released them there - a toy he got, like. The mice were also strangled, because the cat was not afraid, but began to play with it - hiding under the half, under the closet, then jumped out, dressed with the cat around the room and again hid.

Tom and Jerry 20 Years Later

In honor of the 100th anniversary of the death of the Titanic, a copy of it is sent to sail on the same route... I wonder, will the iceberg participate in the cosplay?

Did you know that the expression “Dark like a black man in his ass” is based on the hypothesis that the anal hole of a black man is darker than the average European? Has anyone tested this hypothesis in practice? Where are these "Destroyers of Legends"?! to

It’s great in the forest! I saw the whites walking around all around eating pineapples!!! to
Alex: Why didn’t you go?

XXX: We are in school.
Music lessons half class
Song: "What is Autumn
In the summer"
I can’t remember the words now :(

XX: What is the worst thing in your life?
Yyy: The terrible thing is when mom writes youtube on my computer, and youporn lights up.

In the United States, natural gas costs 2.33 rubles per cubic meter.
Gazprom is Pidoras.

Talk to a girl about cars.
She: I want a machine so it’s easier to drive.
I: I think if you’re driving, many people will want a car.

The essence of life with my parents can be represented by this story:

An old lady goes on the street, not touching anyone, here an energetic young man runs to her:
Let me take you across the street!
No, I don’t need SP.
No, I insist on it! Which street will you move through?
I don’t have to cross!
No, I have to. Through which?
Well, take me through any street and calm down.
Choose through which!
Take me through the street A.
It is better to go through B or B.
Okay well...
I like it, let’s go through it.
Well, let’s go through B...
It is ungrateful! I do you a good deed, I put my soul in you, and you are still dissatisfied!

I went to a friend to help with the comp, and he disassembled the old things from the warehouse, and until 12 o'clock they were stuck in Lego. I am 25 and I am 24 =)

I slept with my girlfriend’s best friend.
YYY: Well, that’s somewhat unethical, IMHO.
XXX is WOOT. Now the joke of the year. I went into my skype, so she wrote "I fucked yours!and 1"
YYY: What did she answer?
xxx: "guyyы)))) how is it to you? The Chocolate Coffee "
I think I was sold for chocolate.
YYY: You don’t think it 😉

Investigators will not be needed soon, all the evidence will be on YouTube

She: I hate the bull that lives within me.
To keep her quiet, she needs to fuck her more often.
How is it interesting to fuck her?
Do you want to tell the process?
She: Well, it’s interesting to be honest, she lives in the brain.
He: Well, with you, and what else?
She: she wakes up on other occasions, such as buying new boots.
He: Well, wake her up with new boots, and then fucking.
She is: her! Then I’ll just think about shoes :)
He: I watched the discovery show about the creation of the universe yesterday, it was much easier there.