bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №109930
 26.02.2015
Yesterday my dad told me how to make a talisman.
What is another talisman?
You need to get a black cat. Absolutely black. to kill her. And cook during the full moon until the bones will fall away from the meat. And these bones will be talismans. Type of luck.
YYY: Is your father really a heat engineer?

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №109929
 26.02.2015
C onliner.by
Scientists: Marijuana is less dangerous than alcohol and tobacco

Sashaquatro Yesterday at 10:33
There will never be legalization... we have a lot of spirits...

[ + 24 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №109928
 26.02.2015
too difficult. In fact, happiness is a felicitary syndrome. The Medical Encyclopedia
_______________________
Well, as the words "Felix" (happy) and "Felis" (cat) obviously have a similar origin, we make the same logical conclusion - happiness - in cats.

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №109927
 26.02.2015
I would buy $36.

And now it is not clear whether this is nostalgia in rubles, or the harsh reality in hryvnia.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №109926
 26.02.2015
About military specialties:
I have written in the military "manufacturer"
A lawyer with a tower. Such a bitch.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №109925
 26.02.2015
I just followed orders.

YYY: Relax with me. We will just shoot you.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №109924
 26.02.2015
5 copies about gifts for both men and women, since people have such difficulties. The best gift is a new experience. Joint exhibition, such as a master class of what your partner is interested in. My husband once gave me a class of jewellery (learned to pawn and so on, I now make jewelry myself - no one has such), and I gave him a lesson of managing a small aircraft of the type of Sessna - a mountain of bricks and a bunch of enthusiasm at the same time, when he was given to hold a jet with two people on board - me and the instructor. Even jumped with a parachute, walked on a yacht, grabbed sushi, chased on a painting, dived with aqualange, learned to dance salsa, not to list - this is remembered for a long time. Create memorable moments, enrich life with bright memories, not a bunch of dirt, so that it will then dust around the corners.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №109923
 26.02.2015
It doesn’t matter what you do, just don’t have to change it.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №109922
 26.02.2015
Another “split” on the subject of England...  

In England, nuclear power plants are on every step. For example, in SLOUGH, it is near London, very close to Heathrow Airport. Moreover, there is no safety zone around the station, residential houses adjacent directly to the station. There is an entire street of row of residential houses, the windows of which look directly at the reactors, right on the other side of the street... Moreover, new areas of housing and shopping squares are built directly on ground-buried radioactive waste (!)...
In 2012, during the construction of new houses, during the digging of foundations, barrels of bright yellow color were found in the ground, with familiar triangular symbols - a sign of radioactive danger. As it turned out, since the construction of the station, the radioactive waste has not been disposed of, not exported, but simply buried in the ground at a depth of not more than 1 meter, on the territory of the station. Later this, and so small territory, the state shortened, (the land in the vicinity of London is expensive!Sold to builders. And they built huge areas of SLOUGH TRADING ESTATE and residential houses - right on this nuclear laundry... On the site: https://nuclearslough.wordpress.com/ you can see and photos, and links to documents on the subject, such sites (left, as a rule a lot)...But on sites such as the Air Force you why not find such information :))
Interestingly, when reactors reboot nuclear fuel, the radioactive background in the district increases very strongly, so, "to avoid panic," to measure the level of radiation near the station, especially, to publish it in the media without the appropriate permission is not possible. In the name of caring for man.
It is funny why the European "greens" very much like to protest against oil and gas platforms (in the order of less dangerous, if at all, at least something dangerous, in any sense), anywhere... in the deserted Far North of Russia, and in the same England, 10 kilometers from London, - in the emphasis do not see such very... gmm... controversial things...

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №109921
 26.02.2015
I can't understand why oranges grown in another country, on another continent and brought thousands of kilometers to Russia are cheaper than potatoes from a local sovhospice?

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №109920
 26.02.2015
Russian banknotes dropped by a third. Swiss paint used in the manufacture. The Euro traveled.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №109919
 26.02.2015
On the eve of March 8, British scientists proved that gold jewelry causes depression.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №109918
 26.02.2015
What is the job of the translator in the market?
Question: Dear colleagues, I apologize for the modest question... what is the job of the translator in the market? I understand that it depends on experience and qualifications but I at least have an exemplary price.

OTET: So-and-just more paid translators who know the difference between dialect (Baba, why cancer?) and a pretext with a place name (What do you want, sweetheart?)

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №109917
 26.02.2015
Born during the signing of the mortgage contract in the bank:"In Russia, the marriage contract is perfectly replaced by the mortgage contract, with the wife as a guarantor";

[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №109916
 26.02.2015
xxx: What kind of trust between people, can we talk about when on the background of monuments, now photographed not asking for passers, but with the help of a rod?

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №109915
 26.02.2015
30 years and 3 years lying, not getting up, Ilya Muromets on the oven, but the "ambulance" in the village never arrived.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №109914
 26.02.2015
Do you not believe in God? But why? Faith in God makes us happy.
This is exactly! My faith makes you happy! Go with your crosses, prayers and gifts!

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №109913
 26.02.2015
Memento_mori: I forgot to take sugar to work, went to the buffet to buy. I: "Can you buy sugar?" Buffet: "Yes, of course! In the cup?" I: "Yes, please". The buffet gets the plastic glass bigger, at this point another buyer fits (as it turned out later, after the tea).The buffet: "You are full?" I: "Yes". A buffet squeezes sugar in a glass with a goat and the buyer's eyes increase as it squeezes in times. Buyer: "Oo_Oo You drink tea for nothing! Sorry, and the bag you’re going to put there?" I: "Nothing, I’ll find a place. The most important thing is to be sweet". I pay and leave.

At home in the evening I decided to eat mushroom meat. Most people don’t eat mushrooms except me – they don’t like very spicy. I scratched the last remains out of the bank, put the bank in the dishwasher, I sit down and eat. The question in the back:
Do you eat mushrooms in banks?
What a day today!

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №109912
 26.02.2015
Answer: OK, when a girl doesn’t know what to give a guy – maybe they haven’t been familiar for a long time. But when a wife doesn’t know what to give her husband..."

We have been married for 13 years. We met for 3.5 years. Holidays with gifts at least 5: date of dating, birthday, New Year, 14 and 23 February. Then the date of the wedding was added. How many gifts have been invented and presented during this time. You can know a person perfectly, but to give him something original every time no imagination is enough. Especially in marriage, when we have grown up to financial stability and can just buy what we need, without any reason. I remember with nostalgia the time when we just met: then anything could be a pleasant surprise!

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №109911
 26.02.2015
When I first saw a selfie stick (two young Chinese women were photographing at the station), I even mistaken: I didn't know what it was, and decided that the girls were just very shy, can't ask them to take a photo, so they mastered this device themselves. So to say, from shit and sticks)

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