Just by clicking on recaptcha, you realize that with the first option you are still lucky.

The head of the GUVD of Moscow personally closed the underground casino
I went to work in the morning and said:
The boys! We are closing.

Do you like the missionary posture?
She: Just in other poses you’re scratching my liver.

Hateful I (20:42:53 12/02/2011)
Astronauts in space cannot cry because there is no force of attraction.

Hurtful I (20:43:00 12/02/2011)
Never thought about it.

Hateful I (20:44:53 12/02/2011)
In space only uber-brutal men are taken

Hateful I (20:44:59 12/02/2011)
who do not cry

Green (20:45:03 12/02/2011)
:DD

Green (20:45:27 12/02/2011)
At training, they insert onto the rings like monocles.

Green (20:45:34 12/02/2011)
Look at the Lion King.

Green (20:45:38 12/02/2011)
simultaneously

The boy said:
He served in the army. Part of it was on the territory of a small town. He briefly met a local prostitute. Wasted her. Last night she came to visit him. The fence was partly from a rabbit grid. But it was on one side of the fence, and she on the other. He wanted a bottle on the floor. She, in short, became the back of the fence, and he therefore settled over the grid and spied it. Suddenly he sees that large army knots are coming nearby. He thinks it’s burned. They saw it all and said to him, “Young man! He did not go on his own and did not allow strangers to enter the territory of the unit. A round-the-round march in part!And" how that happened.

Who has a branch of saccharose in a blade, who has 20 million hryvnia, who has rescuers and specialists, and who has 28,000 bottles of red wine to Japan. Well, how Moldovan can not be loved, they are so cute=0)

The call from the representative of the customer, the voice nervous, excited:
Will you be engaged in our project?
I don’t know exactly what the call is, I answered confusedly:
Of course, he is at work.
The client continues dissatisfied:
Did you promise it on Monday???! to
I was completely confused:
Yes, and what?
Judging by the voice, I just got the "chess and mat":
Today is Thursday!!! to
I am still trying to understand what is happening:
Did you order it just yesterday, Tuesday???? to
And yes?Oh sorry...

My mom is scared of me... I bought some new tea, I sit at the compot, I drink. She approaches, says: “Smell, what does tea smell?” and “I’m (already accustomed that she’s always cooking hard): “Strong tea?” and “Mom (fun): “No, cyanide potassium!” and “I’m squeezed!” It turned out that tea with almonds was...

XXX: Remember we were with you and when you finished, said oh..?)

The most favorite thing in cleaning an apartment is chasing a cat with a vacuum cleaner.

X: Today I was scared of my own stupidity.
x: agreed to meet at 17:30 with the girl on Friday.
X: I go after the pair, I come, I stand, I wait. I look at the clock, I think to call and I look here, I arrived an hour earlier, at 16:30.
x: at 17:45 I still call, it turns out today is Thursday and I agreed to meet with another girl: (((

Lust really makes a woman stupid, but so happy.

Recently, we had a "white beast" - a dog of the breed "Vestik". Very affectionate, but annoying - stick to everything, and until it lickes - it will not calm down. On the street, too, she sticks to everyone, her tail turns into a fan, she stands on her back legs and begins to jump. We taught her to touch the strangers, but not to show kindness is, apparently, above her strength.
Her husband usually walks with her. Yesterday he came back from a walk and whispered, “I love this dog!” He tells. They enter the elevator, and there is already a girl from our entrance. The girlfriend knows the beast, and knows that she loves to express her joy. He clamps to the wall of the elevator and cries:
“Do what you want, but don’t tear your socks.”

He still regrets not taking advantage of the offer.

Today in the Georgian Hall of the Kremlin were solemnly awarded orders and flashes.

We enter with Dimka in the slurry workshop.All the slurries sit.Sanya boasts:
You do not have that!
With these words, Sanya drops her pants.On the trousers with the big letters:"Welcome".
Look back and forth without clothes.
Everyone was crying.
The Sun (C)

Arsenicum: what is it?
Arsenicum moved hosts from Egypt to Libya and then to Japan.

A young man gave me a lily. Such a large bouquet, large. It was March 8th.
Well, I put that wreath on the kitchen in the vase, and we went for a walk with him.
In the morning, this subject wakes up, goes to the kitchen, and from there there is a cry full of sacred disgust:
Is this the smell I gave you?? to

by ALI_KS I have a great team of drivers. Three mountaineers, two old men, four future police officers with brick faces, one acne child, one spouse and one apparently gay, because he knows more ways to tie a shuffle than I do.
by ALI_KS We will surely die out.

DC: I had a neighbor in the town hall that was impossible to wake up
DC: In principle, it is impossible if he slept
DC: One day he was asked to the phone, in the afternoon, he slept
DC: I went to wake up.
DC: I pin it, oral it, waved the alarm - it didn't help
DC: Then I poured it out of the tea.
He opened his eyes, looked and asked.
Q: What are you, ohhh?
DC: turned and slept further

In the ASCII:
Q: What are your plans for the evening?
YY: Well, I was going to jump with a skate, and then go to the gym, which is next to the house... But here came a husband, brought a cake, a piece of cheese and a bottle of vinyl. You will have to sit at home, eat, cuddle and cry over the heavy part of the grandmother.