bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №108830
 02.02.2015
Letter to technical support provider. We cry.
"Good day to you!
Today, Google is constantly asking you to enter a captcha, please figure out what suspicious activity"

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №108829
 02.02.2015
The head of the Luhansk regional state administration Gennady Moskal said that the militias of the LPR used psychological weapons against Ukrainian security forces: loudspeakers, through which songs of Russian pop performers were broadcast.

Hope Babkin was classified by the Vienna Convention as an OMP.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №108828
 02.02.2015
I talked to Betty 5 minutes ago. I come to the kitchen...
Leha, I heard the library burned.
Only 15 percent suffered.
"But I don't understand, the new building, it's a library, there must be sensors, there must be a fire extinguishing system.
It is not intended in case of fire.
Daddy is rugged. Everything, he says, is now understood.

[ + 14 - ] Comment quote №108827
 01.02.2015
Why write about something that you have not fully understood? First, GMO products do not exist long enough to judge their harm or benefit, so this argument can be removed at all. It is interesting how the Soviet geneticists, having created modified corn with wheat, did not create special herbicides for them. Yes Yes
___________________
Personal computers and mobile phones – and even less. Therefore, their harmlessness is also "not proven". Remove from the monitor. And take the like-minded ones.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №108826
 01.02.2015
Life recursion is when you are trying to sell a series of lectures on the phone "effective sales on the phone"

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №108825
 01.02.2015
Moh: It’s a pity for the surgeon to hear that he doesn’t understand people.

[ + 29 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №108824
 01.02.2015
Why do you have red hair?! to
YYY: Strange, I just cheat you with blondes.
YYY: So... Did I say it in a voice? I am going to Han...

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №108823
 01.02.2015
X: can I have sex, with a member of 13-14 cm, I am 17 years old?
Y: It cannot be. Sex with girls.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №108822
 01.02.2015
This is:

"xxx: The fifth year has passed. The woman still thinks it’s the cat pulling dirty socks under the couch.

You are an exemplary fool. What are you boasting about?

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №108821
 01.02.2015
- One of the most sweet specialties is a doctor of ultrasound diagnostics. A good doctor has sweets filled the whole table. I wonder if it is possible to determine the taste of candy and the presence of nuts in them on the device? Then you do not need to open the packaging and give it to anyone.

Just a X-ray! Just a hardcore!

Well right...
The doctor determines the device,
The radiologist uses the Röntgen ray
The oculist has a lump to read the composition
LOR will make a hole and the otoscope will see,
Gynecologist on the touch through the cardboard (the mirror will completely turn the box...)
Neurologist with a hammer
The therapist will shock and make a diagnosis by a characteristic stroke
And the psychiatrist will talk to the souls, and if the candy doesn't answer him, then it's okay.)

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №108820
 01.02.2015
Xu convinced Ukrainian sellers with the help of 62-degree Chinese vodka “ergotou”.
“When I was in talks with the shipyard management, it felt like I was drowning in alcohol,” Xu said. - Every meal I had to drink two or three liters of ergot.
--------
Application for victory! 3 liters per day of such a drink will dissolve a normal person to the state of biomass.
Such a ship should have been given to the master!

[ + 18 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №108819
 01.02.2015
<...> so you can’t distinguish externally frost-resistant wheat from conventional <...>
= is
That why?
Northern wheat is covered with fur and grows only after poisoning with pure alcohol.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №108818
 01.02.2015
How virtuously can struggle swarms with swarms, is written in the diaries of Schwartz:

"He got up late. To punish him for this, Lova Lunz unveiled ads from the House of Arts to the House of Literatures on the Pool. The announcement informed the owners of goats that they were given a black goat for free. It was only from 7 to 8 in the morning – and Mishin’s address was given. Since many in those years held goats, Misha was not allowed to sleep for a long time.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №108817
 01.02.2015
The wife asked to take the child out of the kindergarten, "without bullshit" on the road. Culturally, he went home with him, only snowflakes caught on his tongue on the go. Home from the threshold issued "and I snow EU with papa". and :(

[ + 18 - ] Comment quote №108816
 01.02.2015
I come to one of my favorite grotto for a night, and there three spires digged in the middle a huge pit, well, I was on them with a ride, since you sported my home, and they were me, it was not only your favorite home and let me show all kinds of skulls, archaeologists are their mother...)))
c) the zelade

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №108815
 01.02.2015
I watched the second day with interest as a quote:
""""He hated and put "-" quote with rating 667."""
change its rating from 669 to 663 and back =)

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №108814
 01.02.2015
111: And your wife knows that you are in duty in the Dotan? ?
222: Wife, by the way, played it herself, but for the time being stumbled into Pokémon)
Yes, a woman can, but you are a man! Real men are playing the devil.
222: Diablo has been bored lately.
111: Well then real men choose sex!
222: Well, I broke a bowl of gynec today, and I won't talk about the second aspect, but it was all sbs;)
111: I hate you

[ + 31 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №108813
 01.02.2015
This is:

The most unfortunate people: inhabitants of sub-Moscow, who sincerely believe that they live in Moscow; and Krasnodar, who sincerely believe that they live by the sea:

What is misfortune? The sub-Moscow people sat on a tram or a bus and in an hour at a Moscow museum or theater, or a large Moscow mall of the European type, which is also sometimes important. From Krasnodar to Juba by car or bus less than 2 hours, it is possible to spend a summer holiday swimming in the sea. Do not envy so clearly.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №108812
 01.02.2015
2bratello: One day in a dream I convinced myself that the alarm allows me to get up early because it draws energy from other people on Earth and transmits it to me, thus making me rested. I slept for two hours that morning.

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №108811
 01.02.2015
111: No, still on this paid parking go. Comfortable - it is when you needed to go somewhere for business, went down to the courtyard, sat in the car and went. No need to park anywhere.
No, it’s convenient when I went into my garage, sat in a warm dry car and went.
333 No guys. Comfortable is when you sit at the fireplace with a smoky cup of coffee and a cup of cognac and the palace officer comes in and says, "Sir, the senior manager has arrived with a report. Do you accept it?" And you’re like this: “Thank you Berrymore, take me to the office, I’ll be there in 10 minutes.” This is convenient, and everything else is vanity.
There are no words... )))
222 to convince.

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