bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 62 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №44052
 05.03.2011
Girls are like buses, then no one, then three at once.
YYY: Yes, and you don’t know which to enter.

[ + 60 - ] Comment quote №44051
 05.03.2011
I: Do you remember I told you about a guy I like? So, today at the lecture he was sitting with another girl, chatting with another girl and, the worst of all, dressed up and left with another girl. But he is always looking at me! What, what could this mean?
What, when he’ll fuck her, he’ll think of you.

[ + 60 - ] Comment quote №44050
 05.03.2011
Stanislav: Are you free? : D
Oleg: Married
Stalin: I am sorry (

[ + 73 - ] Comment quote №44049
 05.03.2011
Once at sea, perfectly attached through the bench on the run, a young miracle qualitatively ripped his hip. decently so. Naturally in the head of the 17-year-old lobotrases was born a brilliant plan to save the wounded
1. to fall
Sleeping with cigarette ashes
Closing the traveler
4 is ? to
5 is Profit to!! to
But by the evening the victim suddenly had a fever! Now, it is all banal. I found the phone, called an ambulance. When the two nurses saw this shit packed with dirt and dirty ashes, they grabbed in their voices and asked:
I wonder how you haven’t thought about it yet?

[ + 78 - ] Comment quote №44048
 05.03.2011
How long do you keep silent, and the mint will not be born again.

[ + 67 - ] Comment quote №44047
 05.03.2011
Requesting and requesting documents.
I am : - Mr. Police and what happened)))
He said, “How clever you are! You can die! The happy path. The dissatisfied went

[ + 75 - ] Comment quote №44046
 05.03.2011
from ZH:

My son asks today.
- Mom, check the undisputed "o" in the word "gowns" need the word "gowns"?
Why is this for you?
We were asked in literature to write an essay "How beautiful is this world".

[ + 61 - ] Comment quote №44045
 05.03.2011
My dream is to teach some silly and unnecessary subject to the children and grandchildren of their present schools.

[ + 93 - ] Comment quote №44044
 05.03.2011
How to make a pleasant person.
1st Their ex.
Accidentally, meet her unwashed, unwashed, in dirty and torn clothes. Ask for a cigarette and 20 rubles for a beer.
2nd acquaintance with nine.
Coming out of the audition, to comment: "I am in a hurry to drive on someone else, I am afraid of everything until my hands tremble!"
Three by Mama.
She spoke to her father: "It's a pity that there are no girls like you were in your youth. They are all stupid!"
4 is and Dad.
In a sad voice: "Natasha will not call home again, she said that my father has very little..."
5 is The Taxi.
"No, I do not know the roads. What about the $5,000?"

[ + 60 - ] Comment quote №44043
 05.03.2011
I'm not going to picnic with him anymore, doctor fucking.
What was his thoughtful phrase last weekend?
XHH: said in the midst of the feast:
XHH: "Shashkilk is just a burn of pork"

[ + 42 - ] Comment quote №44042
 05.03.2011
Sho for the political pedestrians occupied the BOR? Go go in your heels.

[ + 54 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №44041
 05.03.2011
She: Dear, I cooked the borst, will you eat?
I: I will, this is my favorite!
I start to bread the soup, and there what is white, I catch a spoon, and there is a peeling!! to
I: What is this dear?? to
She: There was no meat, I dropped the peelings.
You are a puppy!!! to

[ + 87 - ] Comment quote №44040
 05.03.2011
The xxx:
There is a little boy doing miracles.

The Prehistory:
In many schools it is cold, where 8, where 14 degrees. In Taikina school, it was allowed to walk in top clothes and hats.

So he called in the mountain:
“I can’t tolerate onions and garlic, and my mom feeds me with them every day so I don’t get sick at school. I am constantly cold! Tell me, how can you assimilate material to five in such conditions, to remain an outstanding?! to
And at the end:
Is my call recorded?

My mother was called to the mountain.
Secondly, the boy’s school lessons were reduced.
Thirdly, in the tai chi school too, and they did not study at all for half a week.
Fourth, the boy’s teacher said:
Goddan, why did you do that? I should have discussed this in the class first.
- You will discuss with my uncle, who works at the FSB in Moscow, and here I have the right to demand compliance with the conditions of training.
Fifth, he is 9 years old.

The xxx:
I told the Thai. She is:
At school, we were told that the boy complained that his fingers were frozen.

The xxx:
Taika "this is a fanatic", tomorrow, probably, the whole school will know this story.
Gorono is gathering signatures to make him mayor.

[ + 70 - ] Comment quote №44039
 05.03.2011
Child Poetry
Mom is Zebra, Dad is Loss.
How did they succeed? and c)

[ + 114 - ] Comment quote №44038
 05.03.2011
How long to fly to America?

Without thinking, he replies:

for twenty minutes.

And the browner said that they and their mother had been flying for ten hours!

And I tell you that I’m flying 20 minutes to America! Well, maybe 21 minutes, don’t argue!

I know how much to fly to America.

I was interested. I looked at my daddy’s skin and it was true. RWSN (Raket Forces of Strategic Designation)

Z is. Father right, 20 minutes flight to America.

[ + 112 - ] Comment quote №44037
 05.03.2011
In the evening, about half seven. I find it hard to catch myself angry and hungry in a crowded bus. We go. I stand almost on one leg, holding my face to someone’s back and barely falling on my grandfather sitting behind. And here on the edge of my eyes I see a wonderful spectacle: a light-haired virgin in a pink coat and a pink hairy hat, with long eyelids and glossy lips, clutching on the back of someone else's seat and pressing a glamorous lacquered bag-baul with a hand bended in the elbow, holds a healthy piece of half-copper sausage in his fingers and hungry bites from it. My patterns have not yet grown...

[ + 88 - ] Comment quote №44036
 05.03.2011
I went out to smoke on the balcony. It turns out in the neighboring house opened striptease courses... Started smoking more often (

[ + 71 - ] Comment quote №44035
 05.03.2011
Natalya: What did you do last night?
Alex M: Watching the movie at home
Natalya is Puna?
Alex M: So why just porn? Can’t I see any other movies?! to

[ + 83 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №44034
 05.03.2011
I eat marmelade. Marmelade in the form of strawberries - strawberries, in the form of pears - pears, in the form of oranges - orange... Everything seems logical. But what is the taste of marmelade in the form of a boat?! to

[ + 86 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №44033
 05.03.2011
No fuck your mother.
This is the affair,

I found my passport!! In the city of St. Petersburg! Cousin Alexey Valeryevich!!! 21.10.92!!Please publish it!!A man without docks in a strange city!!! to

Very happy for you!
Who was found? Where to write a man, to the village grandfather?

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