bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 32 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №60993
 07.03.2012
We found on:
I had sex with a condom and the guy didn’t finish. Three days later, the monthly...
How do I know if I am pregnant or not?

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №60992
 07.03.2012
What’s the difference – a civil wife or a legal woman?
Don’t say it’s like a citizenship or a residence permit.

[ + 53 - ] Comment quote №60991
 07.03.2012
Favorite today: "Can I buy you a guitar on March 8?"
I asked him three times, fucking.

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №60990
 07.03.2012
The Mayan calendar does not include high years.
Technically, the end of the world should have come 7 months ago.

The Mayan calendar does not include the Gregorian calendar.

[ + 42 - ] Comment quote №60989
 07.03.2012
I worked as a programmer in a company. I worked for two months without a contract. It was not possible to bring documents. I forget to take it, I forget to give it. Finally, I bring a flash with docks scans.
The financial director, not waiting for the end of the printing of other documents, took a photocopy of the diploma from my hands. "Finally we are here!! The first document that confirms your name!"

[ + 35 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №60988
 07.03.2012
by Kain 11:54
Are there other minerals in Belarus besides cortophane?

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №60987
 07.03.2012
Computer science, 2nd course, introductory lesson:
Computers are new, the next batch is foreseeable shortly, about 20 years later, for this we do not touch anything, we hold the mouse with two fingers, if you are not comfortable, ask for help from a neighbor, we do not tap the keyboard, do not turn the monitor, do not bend, if anything - change your position on the chair!
(Student) Igor Petrovich, the monitor stands so that absolutely nothing is visible.
Prepod thinks and answers - Move the chair, if it doesn't help try to turn it on.

The rest of the couple went through in an attempt to suppress hysteria))

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №60986
 07.03.2012
The first comment under the newly released porn video:
"Crazy... a new view, and I have already picked up the old =(" gathered twice as many likes as the video itself.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №60985
 07.03.2012
Who wants same-sex marriages?
Q. Do you have anything against it?
ZZZ is. of Aleppo.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №60984
 07.03.2012
x(23:06): It is free! Are you here?
y(23:06): and geometry
x(23:07): Do you have geometry?
y(23:07): Yes
x(23:07): compassionate( [link to Mass Effect 3] torrent
y(23:08): Go out, the demon-examiner!!!! to
x(23:08): the tablet inside... :)
and y(02:12): the hell...

[ + 43 - ] Comment quote №60983
 07.03.2012
Hello my brain!
Hi my liver!
Father: Wella...


[ + 55 - ] Comment quote №60982
 07.03.2012
My husband and I sit on the couch and watch a movie.
The sandwich would...
and pause. I run to the kitchen. I make butter. I bring. and play.
in 20 minutes.
The tea would...
The same algorithm.
In another 20 minutes.
And yet another butter.
The Third Circle.
I come back and say:
- Here I would lie like that, ballet and let somebody bring me everything (((
M is married!
The exploitor, the exploitor.

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №60981
 07.03.2012
The Boy 1
I thought that I had never met a girl in my life that in my taste completely, that is, which for me is virtually the ideal of beauty, I was always with others and I was fine but the picture in my head was different.

The Boy 2
I’ve long understood this to us ideal men is very difficult.

[ + 43 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №60980
 07.03.2012
We have a very good relationship with accounting. He even made a phone call for them separately. From the movie Mary Poppins, about 33 cows.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №60979
 07.03.2012
Do you think about what to give you for your birthday?
YYY: No
xxx: would you be happy to get something memorable and so much not practical?)
Daddy on the ass? 0 O

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №60978
 07.03.2012
I liked the life phrase of the girl in transport: "I just miss everything..."

[ + 14 - ] Comment quote №60977
 07.03.2012
Will you be a vodka?
YYY : No.
XXX Why?
I am drunk with her:

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №60976
 07.03.2012
XXX: Tell me the truth?
YYY : the truth? Darth Vader is Luke’s father.

[ + 26 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №60975
 07.03.2012
XXX: Are you a girl?
Yyy: Use the deduction
xxx: the term deduction is probably taken from the Sherlock Holmes notes, because it is fundamentally untrue and this method should rather be called ‘reduction’ – that is, the conclusion of the primary fact by the consequences. Given that the main part of the site is people between 18 and 22, and guys don’t like to read books at that age, usually, the more detectives, then you’re most likely a young girl. The same benefit is the fact that now popular series and film about Sherlock Holmes, in which case your age varies from 16 to 19.
YYY: at the point =)

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №60974
 07.03.2012
Xxx: Do you have pets?
YYY: Do you want to come to me?

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