bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №135761
 10.11.2016
About the election of Trump:

Americans seem tired of being tolerant – they still want to call black black.

[ + 43 - ] Comment quote №135760
 10.11.2016
Seven years ago, in the winter, I went to pick up my brother from school. He was seven to eight years old then and I was twenty. And while we go, I find in my pocket two small Ikeev pens, which were distributed there for free and all of them were reluctantly picked up. In my head was a sinister plan. Until my brother sees, I placed an unnoticed pencil in his pocket. After a while I suggested to show him the magic. I take a pencil out of my pocket, stretch it, say to hold, check. Then I take it back and say, “The pencil is magical and he liked you. He will always come back to you.“Then he leaned and drove him into the hole of the sewer, observing his brother’s remarkable reaction. After a little more, I say, “Check your pockets, maybe he’s already back.” Bran begins to ball in his pockets without enthusiasm, not believing me. And how surprised he was when he found the second pencil in his swimsuit.



Five years have passed, a 13-year-old brother comes to me, puts the same pencil in front of me and speaks. Honestly, there were two of them, right?” I didn’t understand what he was talking about at first, but after a minute I remembered that “focus.” I had to admit that yes, there were two. And he said to me, “You understand that I’ve kept this pencil for 5 years and often thought, how did you do it?”

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №135759
 10.11.2016
I need to take a shower, it’s cold. Unwillingness to get out of the warm coat

Be like Ippolit - take a shower in your coat.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №135758
 10.11.2016
Play mobile version of Who Wants to Be a Millionaire.
What was the name of the one-eyed British navy commander Nelson?
The man chooses Mandela.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №135757
 10.11.2016
In order to change the situation, someone must take the first step towards it.

Yes, and at the same time it is necessary to make sure that this is ONLY one step before the other party makes the second step, and also to meet. The main mistake is to constantly make all kinds of concessions without receiving anything in response. In this case, it is easier to turn and leave, and it is not excluded that with this arrangement, the other party will give the desired reaction. Well, or at least find yourself free and get a chance to start all over again with other people.

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №135756
 10.11.2016
Mexmed: In Ashan Farsh "The offer of the butcher". It sounds like the name of the song of the King and the Shit.

[ + 27 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №135755
 10.11.2016
Donald Trump is a reminder that you should interview for your dream job, even if you don’t have experience.
yyy: and at the interview to call all the fools and promise with three boxes
Zzz: I have two weeks here, only the tramps come.

[ + 22 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №135754
 10.11.2016
The male name Donald is an English version of the Scottish Gaelic name Domhnall, which, in turn, derives from two protocol words - dubno (world) and val (rule, possess).
In Russian language, it is Vladimir.

[ + 18 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №135753
 10.11.2016
I went looking for a transparent Sony logo (you see, on the white background I am not satisfied). I jumped, it turned out. I started reading about the SG, went looking for an editor. I caught myself reading in the stones of the hubra how to correctly pronounce Norwegian umliaut.

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №135752
 10.11.2016
We provide laboratories. And here I see that the predd somehow strangely touches our only girlfriend (eh, few girls go to programmers. In the second class, there is only one. I get up to wear it normally. and ah! The dress with a deep cut, which was found on her, after removing the sweater (in the laboratory for some reason it is very hot), she sits herself, leaving her shoulders and thinking deeply - the cut gets even deeper... I begin to think not about the pluses, abstract classes, structures and interfaces, and the underwear is sitting even closer. Therefore, every ten seconds his gaze involuntarily shifts from a sheet to two other objects. After that follows a reflective roll on a sheet with a print.
At the end, he can’t stand and shut up with his palm. Anja is doing well.
I approach her after a couple to her:
A respectable dress! Poor prey all your response tried not to cut into the cut. Then he escaped the temptation.
The girl is red:
The fucking! I wondered why he got his head, was it so bad?! to

[ + 19 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №135751
 10.11.2016
by CinemaBash

Who will tell you why in all the fantastic movies many doors and gates have the wrong shape? Thus e. Why is the line on which the strings are closed not straight, but broken? Or why do the doors/doors not move to the right and to the left, but one loop goes up and the other down? Or by diagonal?

The first explanation: this is how they create the atmosphere.

The second explanation. More precisely, the question. Is there an engineering justification for this form of creatures?
—————————————
The atmosphere, but not the one, but the one that needs to be kept :) The seal for compression is worn off more slowly than for wiping. One pipe is carved down, the other - up, as a result, they are not only compressed along the intersection of the pipe itself, but also perimeter pressed into the seals on the door box. On the one hand, they are simply pressed by the edge, on the other hand, an extension is made on the canvas, which is pressed to the palm. The same - in bushes, pressed to bushes in bushes.
You can make a cut over the plane of the canvas, but this is only if you know exactly on which side the de-hermetization threatens, and on which - not. If the sections are equal, press along the plane.

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №135750
 10.11.2016
Dialogue between two branches in the corporate chat:
hhh (Krasnodar): hello Omsk )) we are on forecast today +26 )))
We will soon be 26 too! There is a small minus.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №135749
 10.11.2016
I am a super-dobby!! to
Have you been fired from work?
A: No, my friend gave me two bags with my stuff, and said to put it out. I can’t stand up, I sing "I’m free"

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №135748
 10.11.2016
We sit in the plane before departure. Someone is angry that she doesn’t have a blanket. The man who sits behind her stretches her. She asks, “How are you?” The man replied, “I’m going out soon.”

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №135747
 10.11.2016
I don’t understand women as well as bank employees: why do they just want to give to those who already have?

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №135746
 10.11.2016
The cat from the Infinity did not just fall out. Please look under the hood before leaving, if the car has recently been warm, a cat may get there to warm up.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №135745
 10.11.2016
You do not drink or smoke – you steal the state.
You don’t take loans, you rob banks.
You don’t have a car, you steal everyone.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №135744
 10.11.2016
If you hack the university server, add yourself to the lists of IT faculty students, and give yourself a diploma, it will be considered valid.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №135743
 10.11.2016
<choisy> Now in the United States two mourning dates: 9/11 and 11/9.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №135742
 10.11.2016
At the end of a working day, the CUP in Houston asked astronauts to participate in a laser pulse observation experiment. They were sent over equal intervals from the McDonald Observatory of the University of Texas in Austin. Armstrong and Collins looked in turn into the onboard telescope, but could not see anything.

“Huyas, something tells me that the astronauts were lucky that they could not see the laser beam in the telescope.

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