bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 79 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №22438
 13.11.2009
And in my opinion, the advertising of Coca-Cola "Fest comes to us" in Russia as "Ironia of fate" - a pre-New Year’s tradition.

[ + 96 - ] Comment quote №22437
 13.11.2009
Translated from English Pirates:

From the translation of the American cartoon on Ukrainian TV (children noticed).
The girl runs away from the bear and cries "Bear!!! Bear is!and "
Below the translation titles "Beer!!! The beer!and "

[ + 84 - ] Comment quote №22436
 13.11.2009
from Google

Malina77: What did you do good today?
Malina77: Good for others.

At 4 a.m. I went out to the balcony and sang a good song for the neighbors.

[ + 89 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №22435
 13.11.2009
The employee calls his colleagues to warn him that he will not be at work.
I will not be, I am sick.
Is it A/H1N1?! to
and C2H5OH.

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №22434
 12.11.2009
The xxx:
What’s there with the password? – Remember, and it’s written false.
The xxx:
Tifou
The xxx:
understood

[ + 62 - ] Comment quote №22433
 12.11.2009
XXX: What a good day!!!))) I will ruin.

[ + 96 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №22432
 12.11.2009
There is a lawyer in our company, funny letters sometimes on the general newsletter throws)) Here are a few of his creations:

Dear managers, someone has taken the stamp "Copy is true" and keeps it with him (apparently copying everything that comes in hand). Do not engage in anger and curse, return the stamp to the window.

Colleagues, I will be on vacation from November 13 to 26. Sorry if you can..."

I remind you once again that in no case can you work with these documents (introduce changes, details, etc.). These documents need to be copied first, and then work with them. Disobedient managers will be subjected to persecution and reproach.


[ + 104 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №22431
 12.11.2009
Everyone says 2012 is the end of the world. The Maya calendar is ending. And it seems to me that the Indian who made it was just worried...

[ + 115 - ] Comment quote №22430
 12.11.2009
About young mothers and with children and about the fact that most men do not need someone else’s child.
Judging by the number of single mothers, most men and their children do not need it (

[ + 81 - ] Comment quote №22429
 12.11.2009
I will complain at all! What a day is not Friday!

[ + 116 - ] Comment quote №22428
 12.11.2009
X: (19:58:05 11/11/2009)
Do you know why a man has 12 meters of intestines?

Y: (19:58:25 11/11/2009)
and? Nao is?

X: (19:58:35 11/11/2009)
Do not burn your ass with hot tea.

Y: (19:59:01 11/11/2009)
I just got a little tea! ? ? ? ?

[ + 83 - ] Comment quote №22427
 12.11.2009
Which animal has four legs and one arm?
Maybe a four-legged one-handed one.
The happy pitbull.

[ + 66 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №22426
 12.11.2009
xxx: I now do not kiss girls at all, I have an obsessive idea that each of them at least once has sucked someone's hair.

You and the men do not say goodbye to the hand (they write) and in the transportation, do not take the helmets, if you may have smaller who, and use the air more carefully, suddenly what kind of girl sneezes after this affair.

[ + 67 - ] Comment quote №22425
 12.11.2009
At the entrance, masks are given to visitors.
The most interesting thing is that when they go out they need to take over and the same masks are given to other visitors.

Here is the mass regime.

[ + 106 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №22424
 12.11.2009
[18:37:41] XX: I have my mother here watch the hour of judgment
[18:37:43] XX: on television
[18:37:55] XX: I go to the kitchen
[18:38:02] XX: how do I think rjod - took asked
[18:38:07] XX: she can no longer
[18:38:12] XX: briefly told
[18:38:39] XX: a carrier at work worked with one grandmother
[18:38:54] XX: in the warehouse, special room
[18:39:31] XX: the shorter door once closed
[18:39:34] XX: and the pedestrian
[18:40:10] XX: decided shorter that this lady will climb out the window and save
[18:41:09] XX: briefly, she walked into the window and stuck there like a viper, a ass in the warehouse, a head on the street
[18:41:28] XX: and shorter this loader took her and fucked her
[18:41:43] XX: further she went to the police hit the statement
[18:42:08] XX: Mint drafted the protocol and said they went to conduct an investigative experiment
[18:43:27] XX: short came, she stuck there again, mint went out to see why she can't get out.
[18:43:45] XX: and then the shorter loader passes again, saw, closed the door and fucking again)))))
[18:44:13] XX: Short hour of judgment is the pedestrian of the campaign

[ + 138 - ] Comment quote №22423
 12.11.2009
My friend and girlfriend met. There and here, yesterday, he asks me to buy him condoms at the pharmacy, said he is embarrassed. I have agreed. We go to the pharmacy, there are 2 sellers, one is 40, the second is such a nice 25 years old, well, I approach the young:
I: Give me a condom of this size, please.
Do you want strawberries or bananas?
Do you prefer bananas or strawberries?
The wild rust of both sellers. Now I am afraid to go to the pharmacy.)

[ + 87 - ] Comment quote №22422
 12.11.2009
XXX: Fuck the whole package of condoms
YYY: EYE... in a good sense?

[ + 78 - ] Comment quote №22421
 12.11.2009
The best proof of the Terrible Mutations and the Environmental Catastrophe is the mole that completely swallowed 100% of artificial fur in my shoes.
Do not let God tell you so!

[ + 81 - ] Comment quote №22420
 12.11.2009
How much you don’t feed, the strings will strain.

[ + 102 - ] Comment quote №22419
 12.11.2009
Yellow ‎(0:00):
The most true sign of truth is simplicity and clarity. A lie is always complicated, fuzzy and multi-word. by L. Tolstoy

-Cherry- ‎(0:01):
And this is what the man who wrote "War and Peace" said.

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna