Yesterday, my husband and I returned from a famous furniture supermarket, bought a closet for the kitchen. They collected it together according to instructions, carried to 3 o'clock at night. Three of our cats joyfully rotated underneath their feet, swept their noses everywhere... We assembled the closet, hanged and closed the doors and decided to put it on the refrigerator. He was lifted up, unbearable! We can't understand anything - before this we tried to raise it, it was easier... Somehow we put it on the refrigerator, we open the doors... and from there, about O_O O_O O_O, the frightened cats are roaring on us =)

A month without beer. It is all shit.
Crab: Transmission "Good night baby" do you know? You are throwing out what duration it needs to be to spin the doll of the chrysanthemum, sitting under the table between the legs of Miss World Oksana Fedorova and at the same time managing to not forget the word!

X: We had a...
xxx: a nice, young teacher practices, we solve the task.
She drew a healthy graffiti, marked the tops with letters.
and asks the audience..."suggest from which point will we begin bypassing the Count?"
The whole group is a choir, not speaking "from the G point!!and "
She says: "No... she still needs to be found" 
Tagged with: rofl
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah

xxx: How did you get this straw, straw, and other beef... almost every day call and: "and you’t want to connect." ]:-> You don’t know how to get rid of them?
yyy: I always say that I do not have a comp at all and do not plan to call less steel.
Yyy: Or you can do like my acquaintance - talk to them on abstract topics. He has a couple of philosophers on the phone. Very abstract and dirty. When someone calls with an advertisement, he randomly opens and speaks to the telephone "and you knew that... (reads from the book)". Until the phone calls itself.
YYY: He also printed from the injection of every sectarian snake, compiled and tried to convert those who called to their faith - the faith in the Prince of the Twenty-second Galactic.

An intellectual competition was held in Australia. The winners were two:
Priests and middle-aged workers.
To identify the very first, an additional task was proposed: in 5 minutes to compose a four-step with the word Timbuktu (a deaf town in Africa, Sahara).
The first, by the draw, came the priest:
I was a father all my life.
I had no children, no wife.
I read my Bible through and through
All the way to Timbuktoo.

The audience is delighted, everyone is sure that the robot does not even know such a word where to go.

He goes out calmly, and:

Tim and me to Brisbane went
We met few ladies, cheap to rent.
They were three, we were two.
So I booked one and Tim booked two.

"The fans of the Azerbaijani national team were throwing the tribunes with smoke sticks... No, stand, I think they just broke the mangal and now they will start to roast the sticks!!and "

Where is the price, damn lazy?
WOW: You, Fyodor Andreevich, seem to have worked somewhat and have not noticed how your manner of communication with colleagues has acquired a shade of familiarity, and I firmly refuse to cooperate with the Hamas and ask you to continue to be more restrained.
The phrase, which you, Andrei Alekseevich, found familiar, was caused by the fact that due to the lack of a current price buyer, our department cannot fulfill the lion’s share of its direct responsibilities to implement the new service of the company, and I am personally under tremendous pressure from my direct management, forced to pay for the simple qualified personnel. So I am by no means the ham, with which you willed me to attest, and not more than a conscientious subordinate, executing the order of the unknown to you, Paul Olegovich, formulated by him in the following way: "Let me stand until the price is delivered!"
XHH: So please send us a ready prize prize soon.
Fuck you, you are lazy!

Listen, was the clay tea in your kitchen?
YYY : Oh
YYY: Has it broken?
XXX is broken. = = (
YYY: You know, to start talking about it with the phrase "was" is like calling from the hospital and asking: "Can you talk to the widow of Ivanov Ivanov?..."

School is when you go to bed in the morning.
EugZol: You hear parents get up to work
EugZol: You think - and it all went nuts!
EugZol: Wrapping yourself in a blanket
EugZol: and... you feel the fucking light of the fucking yellow lamp in your eyes, and the voice – “Wake up now.”
EugZol: and then the flow of thoughts – like shit “what does it mean? At seven o’clock in the morning, how naked are you already?”
EugZol: but it’s not all loud.
EugZol: and you get up fucking like a fool
EugZol: an Institute
It’s when you lie down in the morning.
EugZol: you hear the neighbors get up on the first pair
EugZol: Think - and it all went down.
EugZol: Wrapping yourself tightly in the blanket
EugZol: And... it’s going naughty!
EugZol: It’s really going on!

Under the South of Sakhalinsk is Americos, and with addiction photographs the shrub of Kalina. A man approaches him and asks: Why do you photograph the bush, what is there?
Americos: It is surprising that I had never seen the caviar grow on the trees before.

black-z (14:06:19 14/10/2009)
How do you feel? I have an offer. Come to me tomorrow yesterday. I’ll cook dinner, I’ll make a glitter. Candles, music... I’m just on vacation.
black-z (14:06:31 14/10/2009)
Sorry, not for you.
Iriska (14:06:56 14/10/2009)
I am not against
black-z (14:10:38 14/10/2009)
Fuck... I wanted to send one, and it turned out that the whole contact letter went.
Irishka (14:12:31 14/10/2009)
Happened
black-z (14:12:47 14/10/2009)
Most importantly, almost everyone agreed.
black-z (14:14:37 14/10/2009)
Even a friend said that he would definitely come, only asked the candles!
I probably don’t know about it :(

Arkan - went to soap the rope and charge the revolver
Ljutsiana - Soap revolver and charge the rope.
Arkan – Luciana Burtune... revolves a rope and charges soap?
Ljutsiana - not you confused everything! We need to revolve the soap and charge the rope!
Arkan – What? This is a bad signal, I can hardly hear you. He wipes the revolver and washes the charger.
Ljutsiana - I repeat once again, you are a multi-red-yellow-annihilation-atom-neutrin-root-broken man, you need to MILLERELV the charger and reboot the rope!
Arkan - 0_o XDDDD
Anchar – the brain is wrapped in a cube
RazeR – O * died in attempt to create this

Lapa: and what will we do after these walks and restaurants?)))
Doo Bak: Well, I, as a true gentleman, will take you home and lead you to the door, and you, as a true lady, will undoubtedly invite me to a cup of tea. =) is
Lapa: I don’t even know... I’m just as upset to invite hardly-known guys into the apartment.
Doo Bak: Don’t worry, I’m completely safe sexually. =) is
Ahaahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah Why are you not even thirteen and you are already impotent?
Doo Bak:........................
Doo Bak: No, shit, I’m, just imagine, just well-educated.
Doo Bak: Well what babies have gone today, eh?

From personal experience:
The dark entrance, I am standing on the site and for a long time I can not get the key into the lock well.
Where is that fucking hole? No longer annoyed.
I am here, my beloved. My wife got...

Neshika: Please do not touch our Anushka with your hands!
And don’t give it oil.

What is Jewish in this song?
Do you think the end is cut? xDD

He walked like a bulldozer and ended up like a rabbit. The light"
The teacher was very surprised by this recording.
I too.
by as063)

I think the boss looks at me and thinks "This device can work faster"

I watched the show today about the bad effects of pepsi-cola on the body, so don't drink any shit, I want you to die healthy!)

You are great when you drink.

You are great when I drink.