bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №88545
 19.10.2013
From Discussing Modes to Increase Game Complexity in Skyrim

I'm not in the subject, but after setting up such a fashion for increasing complexity, I died at the beginning, when you run from Alduin).
Just sliding on all the pairs through the burnt cottage, how suddenly Dovakin stumbled on something, while making a dead loop in the air, struck the wall of that same cottage, jumped off and flew into the fire. and burned.

[ + 29 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №88544
 19.10.2013
to this:
The Russians are not threatened in the Zombie Apocalypse: every house is a fortress with home phones on the entrances and bars on the windows of the first floors. Some gardens are surrounded by high fences. I sleep calmly.
2: See "The War of the Worlds Z". There, zombies build mountains of themselves and they stumble to the height of buildings.
You just ruined the dream of the entire population of the country.

The Russians are not threatened by the zombie apocalypse. Stupid Americans don’t put a fence around their graves!! to

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №88543
 19.10.2013
XXX: My finger has been cut off. He was drunk in order not to get a hat, bound his wound, hid his finger in his pocket, suffered until 5 p.m. and went home.
YYY: What did you say the next day?
xxx: "Nothing is true, everything is permitted"

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №88542
 19.10.2013
I agree.

This is :
"Friends forever, I have revenged for us! I was harassed by an old friend, but I didn’t give it to her :)"
You are not a vengeful, you are an idiot!! to


Do you know what revenge is? If you had it qualitatively swept out... and then said, “Sorry, but we don’t fit each other.”

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №88541
 19.10.2013
XXX: What are you doing?
I am studying, I am working! I want to try the reactor again! :) The base is bare.
YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY! I don’t know how the word is written.)
XXX: Where are you working now?
yyy: In the cool center by the operator) Only elsewhere
Yes, the reactor will definitely be more interesting!

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №88540
 19.10.2013
My husband at the company: Now I will write in contact that I am married! How is it done...? (the list of friends appears) Oooo look!! You can choose any one!

[ + 28 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №88539
 19.10.2013
This
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Why do they say in "Bash": "cat, odmin, shredinger"?
Schrödinger had a cat. Not a cat! The cat!
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because NO "cat, odmin, shredder", A "cat, odmin, shredder"

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №88538
 19.10.2013
The head of the capital police department Anatoly Yakunin decided to conduct every Friday in Moscow operations to find illegal migrants.

No, do you understand? He warned them, say, don’t get up on Friday, there will be raids!

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №88537
 19.10.2013
Whose humor is that?
xxx: Your password must contain at least one digit, the title letter, the symbol, the hieroglyph, the colovrat, the number of the beast and the virgin blood.

[ + 34 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №88536
 19.10.2013
to this:
--------
to this:
A girlfriend dreams of finding herself a guy, according to her descriptions: "lone, dull and dull, inclined to philosophy and psychoanalysis, for marriage and family."

When I realized I was perfect...
--------

You are an idiot, you never understood it, right?

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №88535
 19.10.2013
Commentary on the song "Am asuuya"
Hustla_UA: Included in the columns. Blood was poured out of the walls, the ceiling blackened, a gap appeared in the center of the room, someone came out of it, thanked for the release and went out through the closet.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №88534
 19.10.2013
We have neighbors repair, just pulled out a hole in the wall, twenty centimeters.
I want to borrow salt.)
Q: Could you move the TV a little more right?

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №88533
 19.10.2013
to this:
In the 98th year he was sitting at the meeting of the graduation (with his parents) at the IWC (Computational Mathematics >and Cybernetics, MGU). The important uncles stood back and offered to ask questions from the room. >Some mommies get up and start "We were told that cybernetics is a false science...". No one had heard her question since the whole hall was hysterically rotting.

It should be noted that cybernetics was called false science in the USSR, where all space launches were exceptionally successful (if you believe the media of the time), and the evil pops from the RPC did not only have the department of theology in the universities, but also their own educational institutions, with a few exceptions.

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №88532
 19.10.2013
xxx: there is such a beast, "coach", which in English translation means "reboot". he steals quietly and throws on unsecured documents and eats them. Especially he likes to steal before lunch and at the end of the working day, when work in unsaved documents has been done a lot and their loss is irreparable. You can only fight the scam by frequently saving documents, then it is offended and goes to other computers.
He is your beast.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №88531
 19.10.2013
A guy and a girl in a supermarket at the box office:
Let’s get a kidney for girls.
D – What are you? I'm not an adult girl, so I have to go shopping for adults. Give me that kidney with the pirates.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №88530
 19.10.2013
to this:
The hotel "Lady Lake" We have a lot of experience receiving Europeans.

The ice battle was on Lake Cuddy, if you are about it. On Ladoga, from the famous, there was only the "Road of Life" from the besieged Leningrad. Learn the story, your mother.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №88529
 19.10.2013
Mister "Iron Logic"

Forever friends, I have revenged for us! I was harassed by an old girlfriend, but I didn’t give it to her :)

The most interesting thing is that "insulted" some, and revenge others.
Let’s say that you’ve been kicked off by the 8B. But nothing, then you caught a couple of excellences from this class and broke them.
Be proud of what...

[ + 40 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №88528
 19.10.2013
This is what "Houston cries"...
_____ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
This is what, my father on the home phone ALWAYS meets type "Base of torpedo boats", "Drug Dispensary", "Pronto", "Winter Listening" and so on. One day my brother’s teacher called. After the greeting "Osama Bin Laden’s Residence" in the telephone to invite parents to school changed my mind :)

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №88527
 19.10.2013
I snorted with my wife in the evening, snorted me about higher education, I inst. has never finished. In the morning I go out to smoke on the staircase cage, and the larvae in the door broke, I remained in some shorts and boots, the street is raining, it is cold... I called the door, I decided to knock my wife, I said, “Go into the apartment, take your diploma in your left hand, in the right crucifix and save me!” After a couple of minutes I hear back coming from the door: "I dropped the screwdriver from the kitchen window, no diploma - work with your hands!"


[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №88526
 19.10.2013
I bought my nephew (13 years old) washing gums in the shape of soldiers. The husband began to scream that he was enough to play with the soldiers, it was time to be interested in the girls.
I say "One does not interfere with the other".
Man (category): "Even how it prevents! Either fuck or play in soldiers!"
In a couple of hours, my husband: “I’ll go before bed and play a little tank.”
I am " good. But as you said, either fuck or play".
Husband (protesting): "But I can do it!!and "

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