bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 33 - ] [8 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №91545
 23.12.2013
I walk quietly through the forest, encountering two bodies. The path is narrow, they came to me and stopped. Well, I am a polite dohuya, I pulled out the headphones, I wait for what they want. I will give them replicas without matte, and then it will be very long. One asks, I say, to smoke. I have already used cigarettes as a second pick "and call". Well, now, our criminal district officer has caught me. I think I can’t run anyway, knees on my knees, and which one of me is running. To talk or to scratch. I already start feverishly pretending what to say, like the first on the second whispered, and listened. And the forest, there is no one, there is silence, and I did not pause. And I play there Luftaffé march in the performance of the SS choir (well, it goes under it just wonderfully). The first stood, hanged, still stood, and issued "so are you from the tabernacles?"
Well, I’m kidding, kidding will be like that.
"Excuse me, but not offended"
They are walking around me, I’m staying in the shower.

[ + 29 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №91544
 23.12.2013
My MRI complexes about excess weight, reassuring him, I say: "You are not fat - you are powerful, and I really even like you", he is on this )) How does he know that my true motive is to continue to look very thin and miniature on his background )))

P.S Yes, I am a coward. I really like this cute bear.

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №91543
 23.12.2013
from 4pda:

Those who don’t like Apple don’t have Apple, those who don’t like Android don’t have Android.
vladk64: Agree, Hard to argue with a man with your nickname)

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №91542
 23.12.2013
1 February this year:

Khodorkovsky will be released before Half-Life 3

He was right)

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №91541
 23.12.2013
Correspondence from Vkontakte. The woman is in hospital and is preparing for an operation.
Q: How long will it be cut?
I don’t know 9 starts.
For: for 6 people
Tagged: us
Good that you clarified 0_o

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №91540
 23.12.2013
To this reader:
and----
I read an old quote:

Jekfat: I made a screening schedule today. Among other things, he wrote: "30 February - shooting six programs". sent to the whole team. The administrator first responded: "The partner refuses to lease the pavilion on February 30. The reason is not explained".

— — —
Do I think my partner is an idiot? I could pay in advance...
and----
If one does not want to fuck another, is he an idiot? You guys, you’ve already gotten out!

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №91539
 23.12.2013
We went to the bar and went to the bar! P.S The lab did.
and without me (
Zzzz: and without me :)

[ + 24 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №91538
 23.12.2013
Olympic fire in space, Olympic fire on the bottom of the Baikal... do they have a competition for the best way to get rid of the Olympic fire? Thus, throwing it into the slope of Mount Orodruin is a proven option!

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №91537
 23.12.2013
Ges: And I think Jesus called the followers behind. And about apostles for beauty invented.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №91536
 23.12.2013
Gregory
What role did you play yesterday?
Irina
The poor little girl.
Gregory
You wicked me, you wicked me 😉
Irina
I was just sick – I was in that mood 😉
Not to hide, but to give you pleasure.

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №91535
 23.12.2013
X: We really don’t have time to process applications. or more people, or do it in mind: in two lines.
Y: I will think.
X: What do we do while you think?
A: Allocate one person to the Orthodox sapport.
X is?? to
Q: After identification questions, you ask about religion. If you are Orthodox, you are sent to the Orthodox sapport, who attentively listens to everything and reports that he will pray for the swift resolution of the problem.
This should reduce the load by one-and-a-half times. Serge, are you a believer?

[ + 52 - ] Comment quote №91534
 23.12.2013
Alex is
So what "cause of need"?!!! Do not laugh!
Call a prostitute and ask instead of a mine to wash the floor in your home! None will agree!! to
_______
There was a deal, with a comrade took on the road two terrible little, for cheap for the whole day. We brought to the country... one gave grabbers, the other a stamp :) Surprised, of course, but after three hours they gave us order on the whole site, got the cups and went home happy.
Do not judge by yourself ;)

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №91533
 23.12.2013
Comments on discussing the titanium phone on the 4PDA:
ss_2003: The phenomenon of Fox, on the scale of the phone, is insignificant. I had a titanium break, one pleasure to go.
FreezingAzure:ss_2003, Mr. Freeman, are you?

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №91532
 23.12.2013
When I feel like there are fools around me, I look in the mirror.

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №91531
 23.12.2013
<shai> one day a dumb man stretched his gloves on his feet. This is how the socks appeared.
<akshurgi_яаpalosoK> shai: Instead of the valley gloves stretched on his heels.
<akshurgi_яаpalлосоK> shai: A classic of the same.

[ + 50 - ] Comment quote №91530
 23.12.2013
here here :

The path to Zen cognition is a broken signal (clakson) in a machine. In the winter"

I saw the case: on a narrow road with unilateral movement is going right in the middle of some informal, headsets on it half-headed and apparently loud something in them plays... he is pursued by a life-threatening craft of VAZA, the guy behind the wheel drops the window and says something like-"may you leave on the sidewalk?" meloman-0 emotions, he does not hear. So they go-go another 20 meters, the driver asked a couple of times to leave, and calmly so, but then tired apparently. He balls under the seat, pulls out a button from the classon, a large one, rubber, and throws the music lover back straight out of the window. The man jumped out of fear, turns out, pulls his headphones. And then the driver says: "BBC fucking...", picking up his button and passing...

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №91529
 23.12.2013
This permaculture:
>> xxx: breaking a template is when the PREPOD in a session asks you to copy your lectures

This is done by many lectures, which have already been charged by students with the phrases: "And you did not say this at the lecture". Prepare questions based on lectures recorded by one of the students

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №91528
 23.12.2013
XX: As far as I remember him, Gosha has always been an erudite guy. On any issue, he always had his own opinion. True, in most cases, it was reduced to: "And I..."

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №91527
 23.12.2013
He went on to P. Jackson's fantastic combat "Smaug Desolation".
The story reminded me a little of the "Hobbit", but overall – very good.

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №91526
 23.12.2013
The code is compiled and passes all the tests from the first time. You are vigilant, Scuco.

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