There is a department at our factory "Regional Accounting Center".
Here his staff came for a meeting at our department. A phone call is issued, the colleague responds:
I can’t talk to you right now, I have people with hands here.

Why is there a smiley serving a rose in the aske, but no smiley serving a beer?

He was travelling from Kyrgyzstan to Russia. From the Kyrgyz canyon took in memory a few small camels. At the airport, the customs officer looked, stumbled and issued: "The export of stones is prohibited, the stones are the national heritage of Kyrgyzstan, immediately get out of the airport doors and throw them into the urn."

Never, NEVER respond to your girlfriend’s ironically-disgraceful phrase "And yet you divorced me, a whore))"( said after a tumultuous night preceded by a quarrel)- "It was easy))"... The face hurts ((

I took the cartridge for repair. I ask "you urgently get it back" – and what? I have a cold beer and I am afraid it will get hot. Well, you are what! Drink beer first.

From the Dating Site:

Sergei today at 22:09
Give it off?
I cry 2000

Ilya today at 22:13
I will leave you on a black day.

Yesterday, at the beginning of the seventh evening, I got into an untrained traffic jamming on the ring in Adler. The mood is shit. And there is still a dull haishneh, trying to regulate the flow of cars, who pushed wherever, hindered the way. I sit, crawling through my teeth, watching the haishnogo. After stopping our flow, it begins, strongly gesturing the guides, from the other row, calling not to dwell and sharper progress. He started with the fact that, just actively working with his brush, he made longitudinal swings with his rod, but, apparently, this seemed to him not enough. Then he dropped the rod on the rope and began to roll it up like a propeller. And so, the painting - stands a haishnogo in the middle of the traffic jams and depicts Carlson, but with a propeller in front. And here at the rod, the same brushed rope and the rod flies away in the sky. The fainting face of the haishnogo, shaking his head and accompanying the glimpse of the rod flying away from him, was not soon forgotten to me. Never before have I seen so many smiling faces in the traffic jams.

1: And I learned yesterday on a drunkard how in English will be "It wasn’t"
2: So what then?
She was She wasn’t!
2: O_O by my you onfuck

Study Mom Grith
Clean up at home.
I am everywhere?
Yes, and in my room!
And when I said, there is no room in my garbage...
I am not mistaken in principle...

Prisoner who escaped by threatening with a gun made of toilet paper and sticky tape (!) He was arrested four days after the shooting!!! Police on a busy street. I was lucky to read it in the newspaper.

I go from the morning, stands hentai, the cap is opened, there is a blonde, I think: strange, where the world is rolling, I already know the blonde in the car, I approach closer, I look the oil is poured - well, I think, really a pipet disconnect, I go even closer, let go, everything is normal - flying into the washing machine)

A nuclear war can ruin your whole day.

How is a cooked cupcake made?? to
by Fuck! You will not believe! From the vaffle tubes is pressed out!!! to

How then gathered for lunch the electrician, Sisadmin and the coder... did not eat, but were swollen! and :)

Case in the store.
I buy 2 cups of beer, from the shelf near the box I take a pack of condoms.
Directly at the box, the girl "blows" beer and condoms with a scanner. At this point I add: more whinston blue please. The girl falls into a stupor and turns the already passed condom scanner in her hands. A few seconds later, he stared me in the eyes:
Is it fat?
Average O_O
Whinston, is he thick or slim?! to

Lianna> what's wrong with my cell phone
Sega> broke down?
Liannah> wiped him with alcohol for the best work of buttons... First he himself separately turned on, then I found him with an open page on oh ah interesting site, but when he in the tel.book began to pick up Yulkin's number I pulled out of him akam and simka nah
Sega> he has her straight as a man took on the chest scattered on porn sites and let's call friends ;))

Russian roads are so harsh that drivers circle them on the sidelines.

Today is Wednesday?
by admin:
Today is Thursday! Wake up! We are not working tomorrow!
Why not work tomorrow?
Because it’s a bad sign to work on Friday!

When you do good for others, remember to reward yourself.

I don’t remember the year 92, 93.

In those post-Soviet turbulent times there were many sects there.

preachers and so on.

So here in all our institute (Kyiv Aviation) and

There have been reports of the arrival of a Korean in the surrounding area.

A Christian preacher.



None of the students and thought would move to go on.

The preaching. But! There was a rumor that when I entered the sermon.

This preacher is given free toothpaste, toothbrushes and more.

Some kind of hygiene. Going out, we went twice.

No need to ask. gathered and went. Indeed, at the entrance

The first is a paste, the second a brush. Fuck, I had to sit down.

preaching, for all the exits of the hall were blocked, so that all

The parishioners could not wash themselves without receiving a dose.

The religious labyrinth.

In particular, in the sermon it was said that, like, repent, for it will come.

The end of the world (not new, I think many have heard). But it was interesting,

The end of the world does not come there, but on a specific day.

That hour! And what the most interesting end of the world is predicted by the Korean

The prophet is coming on the next (I don’t remember exactly, well, let’s suppose...) Tuesday!

And for the ears drawn numbers from the Bible, through simple mathematical

with an accuracy of a second indicate on Tuesday.

number at 11:55!

Hollow brushes and pastas continued to distribute properly 4 times a day to everyone.

The Coming. Students living in hostels and in

Apartments around the institute have managed to get around ten times.

They were handcuffed with brushes and pastas and were aware of the exact date and time.



Everyone in the institute said that now all KYGA after the end of the world

He will go to heaven, for it is impossible to send a man to hell who has wasted his money.

A week on your teeth 5-10 tubes of pasta. It is :)

And then came the long-awaited Tuesday. Classroom with 300-400 seats

All is covered. Sitting all the flow and not listening to a lecture on physics.

Why do you ask, because everyone is waiting for the end of the world and everyone is waiting for it?

Not in physics.

And here at 11:54 in the silence of the lecture hall, a growing wave begins

Pick, swipe and play all sorts of melodies of Montana, Casio, Seiki and

Electronic devices that are designed to not be missed.

The end of the world :)

At 11:55 p.m., the cocafony in the enormous clock room reached its maximum.

power and went down.

At 11:56 the last calling son of the electronic and

A silent silence prevailed.

“And what was it actually?” I couldn’t stand it, the teacher asked.

“This is the end of the world,” he said in the room.

The glass was trembling from rotting rust. The hysteria in the room continued.

five minutes, until the teacher has picked up the journal and the instructions

He ran into the corridor.



P.S No one has heard of the biblical apocalypse yet.

and laughed.



P.S to P.S Then a group of students in the hallway told the teacher

The reason for the restless laughter, showing as proof the posters

Korean preacher and collected toothpaste for the morning sermon

The brushes. The teacher then ringed herself and, taking the poster in

As a souvenir, she went to the school.



by P.P.S. As the rumors went on, the preacher washed away.

Right before the beginning of the apocalypse. I wonder why? It is :)