A little anecdote.
The man began to develop depression from the fact that his wife does everything better than he does, and still prevents him from doing so. They decided to glue the wallpaper, the man on the third canvas surrendered - the back was sick. My wife cries, but cries. The fence began to paint - the neighbor came with a bubble - the fence was not painted. My wife took it, painted it.
The neighbor decided to encourage: But you can ride higher than her on the fence!
The man rejoiced that at least in something better than his wife, runs to his wife: let's see who is above the fence!
The grandmother raised her shirt, struck her leg and turned 70 centimeters. Here the man pleased breadth spreads, and his wife: Where? Let’s be honest – without hands!

Do you know what trust is?
That’s when the dog comes to fuck you :((

This is what you are saying "coders". We have a project for dogs. In the code there is an entity Dog, which has the property "race". We decided to add a new fit - to leave the cats on the bench. And, in order not to blur, the Dog entity added a new meaning to the breed - Cat.

Let’s look at those who are loud. They talk loudly on the phone in public transportation. Sometimes even headphones don’t help. They go and run all the way. is angry

(The Thoughts of Fantasy)

xxx> Blind, in the army somewhat on the hand of debris failed. The nail was pulled out. It is unforgettable :(
yyy> here’s the same fucking thing happened to my leg) where it all started. I think, and I’ll try to find out what’s there. Hell pain and bleeding. A leak patch with cotton was glued, but the nifiga, in a week, scattered everything around. I had to go to the surgeon yesterday.
zzz> * remembers melancholy how she cut off half of her nail plate. On the left finger of the big leg.
The left thumb of the big foot is much more terrifying than the right thumb of the small foot, our alien fellow!
xxx> The main thing is that the suction on the tints do not hurt.

Top 3 false phrases:
"Then I will tell you"
"Chocolate with me"
"You have successfully unsubscribed from the newsletter"

5 is An abortion requires the consent of both parents.

to warm. In other words, is there a right to tell me what I should do with my body? Including all the joys of pregnancy and the real danger of childbirth? by Natasha. The child will be after birth, and as long as he is an embryo, "Papa" does not yet have "Papa" and has no rights.

Today I was not childishly hanged by the question "Which city does Greenwich pass through?"
>>>>>>>>>>>>
Not everyone is able to answer the question "who wrote the Polonese of Oginsky?", in general.

I go home in the evening and see a new sports bag in the entrance. The big. Filled with something. Hm...

Called the neighbor. They smoked. have thought. Called the police.

Two dirty peppers arrived. They stood. They smoked. have thought.

Then they acted professionally. One of them just pulled a bag. A soft like. The second comrade opened her pencil without fear.

and there...

Hockey style for teenagers.

I am for what. If somewhere they throw up an explosive device and the police arrive, we will all die.

The rap was invented by a man to whom God gave neither a voice nor an ear, but he wanted to speak.

I am an investigator who recently received the title of Major. My husband is a teacher of Russian, now all joked: he said, without leaving the apartment, I can rest all year round at the majorka.

"I was very pleased when the weaver who made the fight live turned out to be not real.
I was also delighted when the enthusiast, who got on the face in the live broadcast, turned out to be real.

The cat hunters
At one point in my house there was something rough and rough. Bees and bees, I don’t know. Katie rushed into attack. He ran, jumped and sat. But the whisper is still heard. I started looking somewhere next to the cat. I thought he was holding her in his mouth. and Nifiga. The fucking sit. The Hunter

I wonder, those people who call oatmeal as a recommendation for breakfast, because it is not only useful, but also very nutritious, what are the alternatives to it? Green at the entrance? A mosquito caught at night. "Sweet"

We have a friend who works in a village school as a computer science teacher.
Thro the year, he drove home everything he could from schoolchildren, and as a result, he assembled a good gaming computer, and a month or a half later, the lightning went off, and the computer and the router burned fun.
Now we call him Sanya Karmastraik.

“Everything is made up of atoms, but beer is made up of very good atoms.”
Xen0n: It turns out, even atoms are worse than in Bavaria.

I once came from San Andreas (at the time of Hot Coffee) to the browser in which a porn site was opened. I had to explain to Bat that these are all viruses, and I am not in business.
Years later, I bought him a notebook to watch his football pieces there, and he, like any normal person who first came to the internet, used to watch porn. Burning, he told me, word by word, that these are all viruses, and he is not at work.

"This guy loves heavy music... not everyone likes Scorpions" - what??? "Scorpions" is heavy music? To breathe in the air, it is the opening of the century!

I had a friend who was fucking looking to buy Gondons. Therefore, he must have taken one of his friends with him to the pharmacy. One day, it hit me, and at another such event, I approached the pharmacist and asked: "Do you still have super-strong condoms for anal sex?" Since then, he has finally bought the Gondons himself.
Tagged with picabu (c)

Sexual cats
My cat is castrated. When he came to the country and realized the existence of mice, he brought them with great pleasure, alive and not very. And once even brought a very big goose. It’s not about caring for offspring.