bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №87445
 25.09.2013
In principle, I didn’t register on Instagram, after our husband’s Instagram has more likes than I =((

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №87444
 25.09.2013
Fuck, I am a robot!

I mean sitting at work. I sleep after lunch. I do not touch anyone. More and more sleeping.
Here is OP! I heard his name in the corridor. Immediately I woke up and I knew who was talking, what they were talking about, and so on. Even though I slept.)

There is also a sleeping regime in people)))

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №87443
 25.09.2013
Article about how 4 girls rent a 2-bedroom apartment (well and do not complain, of course)
The comments:
XHH: It is quite normal for 2 people in a room.
In Siso, there are 50 people per 30 meters.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №87442
 25.09.2013
Of the frequently asked questions about the registration of the FMS passport of the city of Kursk:
"Will a passport be issued for 10 years to a youth of undertaking age?"
- "The FMS does not deal with recruits. If the military is concerned, they can agree with the FSB officers to stop the evaders at the border, as is now the case with debtors.

Good response from the official service :)

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №87441
 25.09.2013
Dugvadorj: I used to think that there are things that can’t be broken or broken, but then I got two boys and now I know that nothing is impossible.

[ + 18 - ] Comment quote №87440
 25.09.2013
From Habr:
Don’t try to explain to people that you’re an expert in a narrow field. For all people, all IT specialists are divided into one type: “programmer.” You can repair computers and upgrade the equipment. You can paint and paint. Or code in C++, but for everybody, you’ll be a crazy person who can look at a computer.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №87439
 25.09.2013
No time had come, he fled, for a long time the jungle was wrapped up by the hungry war of the masters of life, standing at the top of the food chain.
YYY: In my childhood, I represented the food chain as a bandage of sausages.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №87438
 25.09.2013
Yulia Cheshire has bought a cottage)) Siberia))
Is it called Cheshire?
I don’t know (Yes, I have to ask)
No to Yulia))
Stas Now he can take photos "I and Busya".

[ + 70 - ] Comment quote №87437
 25.09.2013
I go to work in the morning, I don’t touch anyone. I walk through the courtyard near the neighboring house and suddenly I hear from somewhere above: - Brother! Listen to Brothers!! to
The voice seems to be not Happovsky and so bassistic, male, a man for years. I raise my head and see a man rise from the third floor window.
- Listen, - continues the man, - do mercy, go out that hentai next to you!
The request seemed strange, and I asked why.
Fuck the pony! Greta, is it difficult?! to
Well, I wondered what problems the tea did not break the glass or the lighthouse asked. Naturally, she proclaimed with her screams the court and surrounding houses. The man disappeared from the window, well, and I accelerated the steps so that the break-up with the owner of the car struck by me did not come. But after 30 steps I heard from behind that the car stopped and then the man shouted:
Thank you friend! I found the keys! Respect to you!
I sneaked and went on. And the mood in the morning was not as depressed as usual!

[ + 12 - ] Comment quote №87436
 25.09.2013
You left me alone.
What is it? OOO
This is how I remember...
I went to the Irish Pub.
Let me try it. This is what? What do you like with Jack Daniels? Compare your drink. What would you advise me? The red elephant? Eight rounds? and give it. Give me more. Give what the guy ordered. Give me an elephant, where am I? Where do you take me? Home, there is...

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №87435
 25.09.2013
St. Petersburg in September. I jump out of the bus and get under the town, which instantly turns into rain. I don’t have an umbrella, so I run to the nearest coaster. At the same time, three guys rush with one umbrella on three. They stand up next to me, and one says, “Listen, maybe this bar is nafig? Let’s go to the universe, it’s closer!"

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №87434
 25.09.2013
You are late for a couple of hours. Here, the girls were invited to the Italian dinner of anyone - gender and age does not matter, according to them.
ZZZ: And the candidates guessed that dinner would be at their expense?
XXX: Well in the announcement was "there are products for the Italian dinner". We consulted here and decided that they had a pack of pasta and water in the crane.
XXX: For any girl is very important to be able to present yourself beautifully. I’t think it would be so nice to say that I have a pack of pasta and you come to visit with your buckle.

[ + 10 - ] Comment quote №87433
 25.09.2013
boot_from_cd: My closest contact with an oracle was when I fucked an oracle programmer. By the way, I did not like it.

[ + 17 - ] Comment quote №87432
 25.09.2013
You have to believe in a dream... Otherwise it will be offended and go to another.

[ + 51 - ] Comment quote №87431
 25.09.2013
In some populations of babouins there is a good custom. When two males of approximately equal hierarchical position engage in some common affair (usually it is an attack on a high-ranking male, or a joint production of food, etc.).There is always a risk that they will cross each other along the way. When their position in the hierarchy of the herd is clearly different, and it is obvious for both of them who is the chief here, then there is no problem. But when they are equal competitors, conflict is very likely. And in this case, a special "ritual of invitation to cooperation" has been developed in some communities. They come together and catch each other’s eggs. And squeeze a little, but so that it doesn’t hurt, because if you give in to the temptation and seriously drag, then you have to remember that he holds your testicles in your fist too. This custom removes potential hostility and makes males for some time capable of mutually beneficial joint actions. This is how a strong friendship is born.

[ + 52 - ] Comment quote №87430
 25.09.2013
Putin and Medvedev have promised that by 2018 they will promise even more than they had previously promised.

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №87429
 25.09.2013
I am a city jungle.
The change of season looks like this:
Included Heating
New year
Shut off heating.
Turn off the hot water.
Included hot water.
Included heating...

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №87428
 25.09.2013
From Twitter:

I knew that cooking chicken in honey would do me good. I knew that putting a spoonful of honey on my breast into a cup of honey was bad.
I knew that the day would come when I would need honey as a sweetness, not as a spice.
HH: And this day has come.
I drink tea with honey with the taste of fried chicken.
I am a fucking...

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №87427
 25.09.2013
During the anniversary of the duo...
I found it on the German Wikipedia page:
Patent granted to Joseph Rollings 14 Jan. by 1913
Unfortunately, the historical date was failed - the "Century anniversary of dumbels".
Preparing for the 110th Anniversary.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №87426
 25.09.2013
Instructions for VPN:
- If the router works without rebooting for many months, then before changing any settings requiring recording in nvram, it is better to reboot it by overturning the power. This will save you from a lot of unknown shit.

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